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polterguy
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09 Mar 2010, 10:37 pm

First of all Hi everybody, I'm new here and I am an adult with [self diagnosed] Asperger. I had two of my three kids diagnosed a couple of years ago, and slowly, after some time "in rejection", I have realized I'm "an Aspie" myself, and what that means.

I don't have [too much] problems with eye-contact, and socially I'm mostly functioning close to optimal, although way too often I will say things not really appropriate, and I'm not good at picking up social cues. I was nick-named "the walking encyclopedia" when I was in elementary school, and everybody keeps on telling me I'm "super bright". I'm kind of a geek, but I've got my own IT/Software company, and although I'm not hugely successful [*YET*], we're getting there. I've now got 3-4 employees, and this is actually my second startup.

I realize this is to some extent a controversial topic, but I actually registered here purely to put this out there, so I am pretty motivated in regards to this, and I'd love to hear opinions about this.

I don't consider myself as "sick", I consider myself as ** BLESSED **! I would never have traded my so called "bad" traits away if that meant also loosing my IQ, memory, skills and ability to focus on tasks over long period of time. But more important to be frankly, I get pretty pissed off when people try to tell me how my *KIDS* are "sick" and "suffering"...!

Sure I can clearly see that they are socially more challenged than the average, but they're also 20 times brighter than the average...

Their Mom has been pondering into their heads [especially my daughter] how this is a "disease" and she's even tried to get them on medication, which I clearly see as almost somewhat of an abuse!

I wrote some of my ideas up here; [link removed - M.]

The way I see it, in both of my kids, myself and everyone I've met before who I can clearly now in retrospect see had Asperger, this is somewhat of the new word for "Super Intelligent"...!

Or...?

I'd love to get great resources on Asperger/Authism, I've read some of the blogs from people regularly posting here, I've watched White Tiger's movies [thank you, great info :)] but I'd love to read even more...

... as most Aspies, I guess I'm no exception, I too am an "information junkie", and thankfully I'm able to turn down video games in favor of *reading*...!



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09 Mar 2010, 10:51 pm

And what if your kids struggled in school and weren't the bright Asperger types? Would you still see this as a gift or blessing?
I know why people are so happy about having AS if they have a good to gifted IQ, could spend hours on their interests and know everything about them, and be able to pursue a career with it. Some of us, however, are not that fortunate.

I do not think that your wife should say her kids have a disease and try to get them on medication. There's no medication for AS, apart from dealing with anxiety, depression or co-morbid disorders.
It's kind of like how people called me slow and stupid all my life. I started to believe it.


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09 Mar 2010, 11:03 pm

Asperger's and general intelligence aren't very strongly connected. It's just that when you define some group to contain no developmentally delayed people, naturally the average IQ in that group moves up.

Now, if you're referring to the fact that autistic people tend to have skills scattered all over the place, and usually end up with some strengths that are above the neurotypical average, then yes--definitely. Autistic people do tend to have talents of this sort. There is a tendency to be very, very good at some things, and be very, very bad at other things--a very unique sort of cognitive style. The strengths can lead to innovation in many fields (notably art, music, science, engineering; many others are possible). Work with them, and their strengths can turn into careers for your kids.

My opinion on medication: Well, if it helps, then it's a tool you can use; but it's neither a cure-all nor is it a poison to be avoided at all costs. So, don't automatically rule it out. But you are absolutely right in not automatically putting your children on meds. If there's a non-medical way to do it, then that's highly preferable. Learning tends to last. Medication, not so much.

Autism is both a blessing and a disability.They are not mutually exclusive. :) I enjoy my talents; I enjoy the way I see the social world from a distance; I enjoy the way I get fascinated with things. I may never be able to understand what it feels like to be part of a social group, or to instinctively read others' non-verbal communication, but then, they will never know what it is like to be absolutely fascinated with something. (I really think it is much like falling in love, when I find a topic like this. I tend to skip from topic to topic every few years. Some people have life-long special interests.) It is a different life; but it is not inferior. Once people stop thinking of disability as inferior, a lot of problems will have been solved.

Autism is not a "disease". Someone with autism has a healthy brain that is arranged in a different way from the typical. The autistic brain is not out of balance, nor is it injured; it simply develops differently. (This is the origin of the phrase "pervasive developmental disorder" to describe autism.) If you wish to label it something, "condition" or "disorder" may be better (if one acknowledges that "disorder" does not mean "disorderly", in any case).

Your kids sound like they are probably twice-exceptional, right? If you haven't heard of that, it is a term to describe what happens when a child is both disabled and gifted simultaneously. It can definitely happen with autism... and yes, it complicates things at school. You may have to tangle with the school system to get your kids the education they need; because often times, they will either try to underestimate them because of their disability and not let them develop their strengths; or else they will overestimate because of their giftedness and not give them accommodations for their weaknesses. Either way is bad. (Are you in the US? They should have IEPs; and yes, you can put giftedness in a child's IEP and make sure they are being allowed to develop those skills.)

A lot of people are getting pretty angry about the whole "medical model" of disability--you know, it's a disease, you need a cure, you've got to sit around and make puppy eyes at the doctor so you can have a "normal life"... yeah, gag me. Seriously not. Disability, at its base, is defined by society, by the gap between what you can do and what society expects of you. Simple as that. It doesn't have to be a negative concept. The only reason we define it as negative is because our society has decided that being really crappy at communication/socializing/executive function/whatever makes your life worse. It doesn't, though. I mean, is the average guy's life worse because he's not an Olympic athlete? I doubt it. The problem isn't that autistic people have this disability (i.e., have a skill set that is not made for the culture we live in); it's that society figures that the disability is intrinsically bad.


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10 Mar 2010, 12:35 am

polterguy wrote:
Sure I can clearly see that they are socially more challenged than the average, but they're also 20 times brighter than the average...


Hey, you're a smart guy, why don't you think about this. Imagine, just imagine, if they weren't 20 fold brighter than the average kid... can you see it? A kid who can't pick up social cues like the others, doesn't recognize when they're being taken advantage of, can't for the life of them figure out why others seem to dislike them more than most, and they also struggle with their work. Hm, I'm not one to quantify the qualitative, but if I had to guess at how bad their situation would be, I'd say about 20 times worse. But I'm so glad you're proud of yourself IQ... like I'm proud of my health and fastidious attention to exercise, which, like you for some dumb reason, I attribute to aspergers (which I've also self diagnosed).

Nice to meet you!



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10 Mar 2010, 12:48 am

*sigh*

Look, I understand it's irritating to get yet another "aspies are special and intelligent and superior" thing, but you have to realize where this comes from. Lots of people start out coming to terms with having autism by trying to frame it as a gift that makes them somehow better than others. It's not like it's exactly easy to reconcile the reality of having a disability with what the world thinks of disability. And it takes a long while to figure out that you can just altogether reject the idea that disability has to be a bad thing. At first, you're trying to choose between "I'm disabled and therefore inferior" and "I'm talented/intelligent therefore superior". Then you realize, hey, wait a minute; who put that "therefore" in there? Why does disability have to mean inferiority? Why does talent have to mean superiority? And then you realize you're ignoring the third option--equality. And that's a better option than either of the other two.

So go easy on the OP, okay? Many of us have been there. I know I have. Eventually, you just get tired of feeling like you have to justify your existence to the world.


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Last edited by Callista on 10 Mar 2010, 1:02 am, edited 1 time in total.

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10 Mar 2010, 12:58 am

Welcome to WrongPlanet.:)


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10 Mar 2010, 1:16 am

Yeah, I find the idea annoying but I don't like the idea at all of jumping all over someone who is just finding out. It's no worse than the "I can't do X Y and Z so I think I'm defective" way of thinking which is equally common among people who are first finding out and have only standard views of disability to go on.


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10 Mar 2010, 2:03 am

polterguy wrote:
First of all Hi everybody, I'm new here and I am an adult with [self diagnosed] Asperger. I had two of my three kids diagnosed a couple of years ago, and slowly, after some time "in rejection", I have realized I'm "an Aspie" myself, and what that means.

I don't have [too much] problems with eye-contact, and socially I'm mostly functioning close to optimal, although way too often I will say things not really appropriate, and I'm not good at picking up social cues. I was nick-named "the walking encyclopedia" when I was in elementary school, and everybody keeps on telling me I'm "super bright". I'm kind of a geek, but I've got my own IT/Software company, and although I'm not hugely successful [*YET*], we're getting there. I've now got 3-4 employees, and this is actually my second startup.

I realize this is to some extent a controversial topic, but I actually registered here purely to put this out there, so I am pretty motivated in regards to this, and I'd love to hear opinions about this.

I don't consider myself as "sick", I consider myself as ** BLESSED **! I would never have traded my so called "bad" traits away if that meant also loosing my IQ, memory, skills and ability to focus on tasks over long period of time. But more important to be frankly, I get pretty pissed off when people try to tell me how my *KIDS* are "sick" and "suffering"...!

Sure I can clearly see that they are socially more challenged than the average, but they're also 20 times brighter than the average...

Their Mom has been pondering into their heads [especially my daughter] how this is a "disease" and she's even tried to get them on medication, which I clearly see as almost somewhat of an abuse!

I wrote some of my ideas up here; [link removed - M.]

The way I see it, in both of my kids, myself and everyone I've met before who I can clearly now in retrospect see had Asperger, this is somewhat of the new word for "Super Intelligent"...!

Or...?

I'd love to get great resources on Asperger/Authism, I've read some of the blogs from people regularly posting here, I've watched White Tiger's movies [thank you, great info :)] but I'd love to read even more...

... as most Aspies, I guess I'm no exception, I too am an "information junkie", and thankfully I'm able to turn down video games in favor of *reading*...!


All I can say is that people need to stop thinking that AS is a disease. It is not a disease, it is just a social disorder, meaning AS can been labeled as the stereotype of that kid you know back in high school who got his head flushed down the toilet or the kid who you would throw papers at for fun when you were little. It all depends on the level of AS, some people can do very big things if they have a positive attitude about things and willing to learn. Or if you have a bad attitude, you will be stuck living in your mommas basement till your 30 or you will live off social security sitting home all day watching porno. You choose. You can do anything that you can set your mind too, just have a good attitude. I mean look at Bill Gates, he is one of the most famous AS success stories.



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10 Mar 2010, 2:11 am

Howdy all, and thank you all for your answers :)

Yes, I am in the US. I've chosen a Waldorf School [charter] for my daughter since it seems as if they're able to fulfill her needs better than anything else I've seen so far. BTW, I quite recently came here in fact on a visa from Norway. Thank you for the tip anyway :)

There is one thing I cannot understand after reading your replies.

The whole basis for why we're having difficulties in picking up social cues the way NT people can easily do, is our extreme abilities to focus and see details, right...?

This makes us shut out the rest of the world, except that tiny little thing we're currently trying to focus on, which makes us "socially challenged" when we're in the zone, right ...?

When one have extreme abilities to focus and see details, as in higher abilities than others [NT people], that creates deep knowledge about whatever we at the moment are focusing on, right...?

I used to explain my skills and IQ to "normal people", all the way back to my teens, kind of like an excuse for them since I've grown up in an environment where being smart was not socially accepted [google "the law of Jante" or "Janteloven" - Norwegian - if you're interested] as having an interest in things. So when others asked me "how do you do it" after telling them about some obscure thing I read *everything* about, which they couldn't understand even remotely how I could know so much about, I would say; "I don't believe IQ is separated from curiosity or having a deep interest in problems". And I still believe this to this very day ...

Einstein didn't have more than 160 in IQ according to modern psychologies, this means that one out of every 100 people are equally bright as Einstein! Why aren't there 6 billion / 100 Einsteins out there today then ...?

Einstein himself said about this; "I am not particularly bright, I am just incapable of thinking about anything beside one question! For 50 years I've had one single question I've asked myself, and when one does only wonder about one thing, even a relatively 'slow' person like me can get some pretty stunning answers" ... ;)

I am an information junkie, that's why I know a lot of stuff. I am deeply interested in solving problems, always have been, always will be, that's why my brain are "trained", and that's why I'm "smart". I don't believe in "born IQ" or "genetically predisposed IQ". Now why I am an information junkie, and why I am "smart", I still am 100% certain of is because I am able to focus on tasks over a long period of time. So then again why am I able to focus on the same tasks, or read walls of technical texts about one narrow subject? Because I am able to shut out the world. What defines my "social problems"? My abilities to shut out the world! Or like NT shrinks would probably put it; "my incapability to shut *IN* the rest of the world" - or something ...
So, why am I defined as an Aspie? Because of my "social problems" - among other things ...

... those "other things" summed up can all be looked upon as two sides of the same coin. One side's a problem, the other side's a gift ...

So I don't see a separation at *ALL* between having AS and being "bright" to be honest...?

I do not for the bare of my life understand how these two cannot walk hand in hand...?

What I do know however, is that if you focus solely on video games your entire life, this clenches you from your thirst for knowledge and problems solving hunger, but gives you very little applicable skills and useful knowledge. Don't take my words for it, Google Temple Grandin and see some of her video presentations out there ...

What I also know, is that if you do not refuse "truths" about you and your problems [or any other problematic things out there for that matter] you *WILL* start to believe them - after a while ...

... which is phreaking sad to be honest ... :(

So, here's my questions to you all;

* pensieve; I've read your blogs, before I posted this thread in fact, and I enjoyed *everything*, and I tried to soak up as much as I could, and I've seen how you are "angry" with the current state of affairs - and how you are happy to see that people wearing AS as a "badge" might not "make it" into the new category of Autism. I also deeply feel for your problems! And I truly admire your courage as a concert photographer, when you obviously have such rough times going to them! My question to you though goes like this; "Are you sure you're not really, really, really bright? But that you've been told by the world that you're 'stupid' so many times that you've started to believe it?" No matter what your answer here is, I would like to tell you *not* to give up! Your struggle as a concert photographer, is of hugely importance, not only for you, but also for others - as long as you blog about it ... :) Basically, your courage is worth a lot for others! And your way of expressing your feelings is very admirable and a beacon of light to others!

* Callista; Your blog was the second one I started consuming from the signatures in here! Second after pensieve's. And your blog posts about autistic people being murdered and autistics in general made me have conflicting feelings. Firstly, *PURE ANGER* for what you're talking about, and the fact of that it [apparently] is "socially accepted" to murder autistic kids because they're "so difficult". But at the same time, comfort and *HOPE* for people like you denying it to go on unseen...! I *LOVE* the truth! Also when it slaps us in our faces! Keep on at it! However, I don't agree that it's necessarily prejudice to say all those things you mention in one of your other blogs though. Facts are facts, they don't become "less facty" just because they're political incorrect to state! The average height of Nordic people are more than the average height of Asians, is that a racist claim? Of course not...! Now if I were to say that "Nordic people are *smarter* than Asians", that would not only [*obviously*] be a racist statement, but also certainly 100% false! I think you give it away yourself in your reply to me where you say; " It's just that when you define some group to contain no developmentally delayed people, naturally the average IQ in that group moves up". Here you are giving us a fact! Out of that fact we can derive another fact I think, or ...?

* CaptainTrips222; I want to focus on one thing you said in your reply to me, ref; "Hey, you're a smart guy, why don't you think about this. Imagine, just imagine". Funny you should use that word "imagine", which I can only assume is deeply connected with "imagination". Just before I left Norway [a highly developed country, the richest country on the planet in fact, and also the country Obama is currently glancing at when he talks about "health reforms" in regards to "higher quality"] I had a talk with a psychologist which claimed that AS' *** COULDN'T *** imagine. Then she went on to tell me how "imagination is not the same as creativity". I virtually had to sit on my hands not to fly in her face...! How's that for "prejudice"...! Well, I *** KNOW *** I can imagine, indeed I do...! I can imagine a ** LOT ** of things, in fact "Imagine" happens to be one of my favorite songs...! However, what you ask me to imagine, I am actually in fact having difficulties to imagine. I've gone through some of my reasons in the beginning of this reply, but basically to sum it up I see a mutually [must] inclusive pattern on our so called "disabilities", and what's currently defined as "IQ"...! However, what I *CAN* imagine is how somebody can be told "truths" [myths if you want to] so many times that they start to believe in them, and hence they become self fulfilling prophecies ...!

* Callista [2nd post]; Ref; "Why does talent have to mean superiority? And then you realize you're ignoring the third option-equality". *** BEAUTIFUL...! *** I couldn't have put it better myself ...! The paradox is that I've spent my entire life *CURSING* that I was born with higher IQ than others, not because of the "social problems" that comes with being an AS - without even knowing it before the age of 35 - but because of the jealousy this brings me from others ...! I've had to spend large portions of my life *DEFENDING* myself and having to explain that I ** DO NOT ** think I am "more worth" than another human with 100 or less in IQ. I do not measure "human worth" in number of IQ points more then equal 100. The problem is that everyone around me, who do not have my IQ tends to do so. I used to dream about being "normal" when I was a kid. And by "normal" I mean ** AVERAGE IQ ** - not "socially challenged". The way I see it, I'm not the one with "social problems", the ** REST ** of the world are the ones with "social problems" ... Anyway, because of my IQ points I am perceived as a "threat", and I am basically ending up as a victim of "reversed Eugenics" - or something ...! I don't ** CARE ** about IQ points...! Sure, I probably won't bother to discuss "Rocket Science" with you unless you're significantly "above", and I am myself more then averagely interested in "Rocket Science". But the myth that's been forced down my throat that "I think I am special because I am so #### intelligent" - is nothing but #### *BS*...! I believe we all have equal worth! And I don't believe I am more worth than "others" just because of my accidental IQ points. Unfortunately this believe is not shared by "the others", and I end up defending myself for a view, which I myself do not believe in, and I myself also never have believed in either ...!

* CockneyRebel; Thank you ... ! ! :)


One thing that strikes me is you've all got blogs. Some of you *SEVERAL* blogs too...! The average NT guy I know would first of all not have the passion needed to set one up, not even at blogspot dot com, not to mention change its skin and even add up a complex biography at it! Another thing that tells me is your level of *PASSION* and your inability to not share your deepest thoughts...! I bet you all have some sort of philanthropist reasons to set them up! I know that's why I write...

Third of all, I've read your stuff. The level of articularity you're all expressing in your writings are *stunning*...! Now I understand why I am good with the written word myself...

So anyway, to conclude, I know a lot of you ** believe ** that you're only getting the "dark side" of the coin. I however am inclined to believe that you might be wrong, and all you need to do is to "flip the coin around", and see a whole different aspect of Asperger ...

... and I think your way of articulating your thoughts, ideas, emotions and dreams are my main evidence to sustain my beliefs ... :)



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10 Mar 2010, 2:57 am

polterguy wrote:
* pensieve; I've read your blogs, before I posted this thread in fact, and I enjoyed *everything*, and I tried to soak up as much as I could, and I've seen how you are "angry" with the current state of affairs - and how you are happy to see that people wearing AS as a "badge" might not "make it" into the new category of Autism. I also deeply feel for your problems! And I truly admire your courage as a concert photographer, when you obviously have such rough times going to them! My question to you though goes like this; "Are you sure you're not really, really, really bright? But that you've been told by the world that you're 'stupid' so many times that you've started to believe it?" No matter what your answer here is, I would like to tell you *not* to give up! Your struggle as a concert photographer, is of hugely importance, not only for you, but also for others - as long as you blog about it ... :) Basically, your courage is worth a lot for others! And your way of expressing your feelings is very admirable and a beacon of light to others!

People told me that I was stupid and I believed it until I found out I had AS, and that I actually did have a good memory for facts.
Well thank you for your kind words. Hmm concert photography...I am trying. It's competitive, it's stressful, and it will have to be on the back burner while I adjust to my new job. I can pretty much go out and take photos whenever I want, as long as my editors don't suck, which lately they have been doing a lot of.
I basically blog about autism because I can't express myself verbally. It's the one place where I can communicate it to other people.
Yes, I am angry but I am going to get assessed for ADHD. Hopefully in less than 3 months. Maybe then I can start to get a bit of control in my life.


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10 Mar 2010, 3:10 am

pensieve wrote:
polterguy wrote:
* pensieve; I've read your blogs, before I posted this thread in fact, and I enjoyed *everything*, and I tried to soak up as much as I could, and I've seen how you are "angry" with the current state of affairs - and how you are happy to see that people wearing AS as a "badge" might not "make it" into the new category of Autism. I also deeply feel for your problems! And I truly admire your courage as a concert photographer, when you obviously have such rough times going to them! My question to you though goes like this; "Are you sure you're not really, really, really bright? But that you've been told by the world that you're 'stupid' so many times that you've started to believe it?" No matter what your answer here is, I would like to tell you *not* to give up! Your struggle as a concert photographer, is of hugely importance, not only for you, but also for others - as long as you blog about it ... :) Basically, your courage is worth a lot for others! And your way of expressing your feelings is very admirable and a beacon of light to others!

People told me that I was stupid and I believed it until I found out I had AS, and that I actually did have a good memory for facts.
Well thank you for your kind words. Hmm concert photography...I am trying. It's competitive, it's stressful, and it will have to be on the back burner while I adjust to my new job. I can pretty much go out and take photos whenever I want, as long as my editors don't suck, which lately they have been doing a lot of.
I basically blog about autism because I can't express myself verbally. It's the one place where I can communicate it to other people.
Yes, I am angry but I am going to get assessed for ADHD. Hopefully in less than 3 months. Maybe then I can start to get a bit of control in my life.



I used to think I was stupid too for a while in my teens and I also thought I was ret*d despite knowing I had AS. But I didn't know what AS was back then. I just started to believe I was ret*d because I couldn't understand teasing or sarcasm and I needed help with my school work. I also couldn't connect to people but once I found it it was my AS, I started to think again I was not ret*d and felt better and it also meant I wasn't stupid. But it took me a while to get rid of that thinking. Reading about AS helped me out. I understood myself better.



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10 Mar 2010, 3:31 am

Be forewarned that I'm very interested in the world and lit of the X-Men. First have you seen X-Men 3 or read about the early years of Jean Grey's mutation? She had Telpathic and Telekinetic mutant abilities. The telepathy came very strong at an early age. To help her filter out the other voices, Xavier placed within her mind a mental block. When she was older, Xavier eased her into accessing and functioning with all these abilities. I see my hyper-sensory abilities in a similar way. For me at least, I am constantly feeling different temperature changes, smelling different things, and hearing voices and sounds over vast differences. I often have to focus my senses. When I switch from hearing to listening, I must put in extra effort to focus on a particular sound or voice signature and ease back on hearing everything else. I consider drugs to help with something like concentration to work similar to Xavier's mental block. It makes life easier for a person to fit in until they are at the right age to acknowledge and harness their abilities.



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10 Mar 2010, 4:33 am

Callista wrote:
*sigh*

Look, I understand it's irritating to get yet another "aspies are special and intelligent and superior" thing, but you have to realize where this comes from. Lots of people start out coming to terms with having autism by trying to frame it as a gift that makes them somehow better than others. It's not like it's exactly easy to reconcile the reality of having a disability with what the world thinks of disability. And it takes a long while to figure out that you can just altogether reject the idea that disability has to be a bad thing. At first, you're trying to choose between "I'm disabled and therefore inferior" and "I'm talented/intelligent therefore superior". Then you realize, hey, wait a minute; who put that "therefore" in there? Why does disability have to mean inferiority? Why does talent have to mean superiority? And then you realize you're ignoring the third option--equality. And that's a better option than either of the other two.

So go easy on the OP, okay? Many of us have been there. I know I have. Eventually, you just get tired of feeling like you have to justify your existence to the world.


I agree.

I also do not respect the reasons I was rejected, or many if not most of the people who did the rejecting. So there is that aspect or reason for pride, in the general scheme of things they are 'hip, slick and cool' but I don't want to be them. I just want them to respect difference and not pathologize it.



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10 Mar 2010, 5:00 am

Before I start, I must apologize for yet another "wall of text", I am notoriously infamous for it though, I guess it's one of my "extra gifts" that comes with the game ... ;)

First of all I can truly relate in regards to being different, and having a feeling of not fitting in at all. When I heard about the name of this website, I was totally blown away ...!

I used to have dreams [semi-nightmares] as long back as when I was 8 years old about being an "alien exchange student" sent by some alien super intelligent breed from another planet as an experiment to this planet to foster understanding and exchange ideas and knowledge - weird, yes I know! But I guess many here have that same feeling. For instance, I just read a blog called; "Somebody stole my spaceship", so I guess I'm way far away from alone in regards to those feelings ...

One of my earlier creations in computer programming was in fact a computer game called "Abducted" - and was about an alien that was stranded on Earth and was taken hostage to be conducted experiments on, and had to escape and find his hyper-drive to be able to leave back home to his own planet - you do the math ...

I also used to be taken advantage of and be bullied, until my Mom switched school for me, and all of a sudden I had several friends, and I was able to at least partially "fit in" ...

To KJC, yes I have read X-Men, and I believe a lot of fiction have more values to it than just the day-dreaming-like state we submerge ourselves into when enjoying it as "entertainment". I can see wisdom in places where others can only see entertainment. I must only assume that a lot of the reason that is, is because most of those "entertainment movies" are highly likely created by AS' themselves like Matrix, Star Wars, X-Men and so on ... I can definitely relate to that, although I have to be frank with you, and state that I see them purely as "allegorically myths", to explain some moral aspects about the human condition that helps us cope with our daily lives, and not as "direct truths" - in fact BTW, not as far away from my perspectives on a lot of other "stories", which I probably shouldn't bring up directly in these forums, due to them being pretty extremely off topic for this subject ...

As for me I have problems reading my mail [normal mail], and I have troubles doing "everyday things" - like paying bills and such. And yes, I often "panic" when I get bills in the mail. Also, when I get angry, I get totally "over the top" - and it's not always evidently understandable, for others around me why. Luckily I'm surrounded by great people that helps me cope with these things. One highly understandable wife, and a great business partner that helps me run my business by doing the "practical things". Then I can focus on the parts where others define me as a "the genius" - which is in computer programming, business strategy, and paradoxically plan meetings with business partners and such ...!

PS!
Computer Programming has been my "special interest" since I was 8 years old, I'm 35 today ...

For me personally, I read a ** LOT ** of self development literature in my youth, and I know if I put my brain to a practical problem, that have an absolute solution, I'll ** ALWAYS ** find a way. And the weird part is, that even the problems we tend to think of in terms of as not having "absolute solutions", often will actually have absolute solutions once studies carefully. Anyway, so I taught myself, through self development literature, how to meet people's eyes and cooperate with others in social contexts, by studying body language from some of the greatest researchers in the areas at the time, and I digested tons of psychology books to "understand normal people". So instead of having an "intuitive" understanding of how humans work, like most NT people have, I ended up being able to "debug my way" through how to socially interact, and mostly "fit in" ...

Yes, I am uncomfortable with huge social contexts. Still I can cope! In fact I teach classes in my special interest, whenever I get a chance! I also speak at conferences - sometimes with hundreds of people attending as audience ...

I think Temple Grandin explains why pretty good in her biography movie when she says; "I want my life to have meaning" ...

I am still a bit of a "weirdo" and ** VERY ** intense, especially when I am talking about something I am passionate about, which I guess this wall of text is just one proof of. But lately I've seen to be even able to at least partially control even those parts of myself. I still find myself "blurting" occasionally, more seldom now then previously. And my goal for 2010 is to completely eliminate my "practical paranoia" - which are those parts of me that have a hard time reading my mail ...

Even though I do not believe in prayers, I do strongly believe in that we are what we think we are. Everything emerges from our ideas and believes. I think the right words of Lennon in his song should have been with an ending of; "I just believe!" - and not the " ... in me" parts ...

Like Gandhi said; "Be the change you want to see in the world". The only difference between "John Doe" and The Mohattma - which BTW must have been an AS - is that Gandhi believed strongly enough the way I see it ...

And what I do ** KNOW **, with 100% certainty, completely beyond doubt, is that ** NONE ** can believe the way I and others with AS can ...!

Something yet again I want to put forth your blogs as the prime evidence of ...

Couple that with an extreme devotion, fanatical eye for details, and supreme dedication to "special interests" and you've got a recipe for something that might not necessarily be too far away from X-Men in fact ... :)

Most of you here, also shows a pretty decent 20/20 vision in regards to morals BTW ...

... I know I am!

In fact, not having a "box" was part of the "foundation" of AS according to that shrink I talked about previously. So when a NT sees a table, he sees something to put his coffee on top of, when me and all you other AS' see a table, we see a potential boat, by putting on a big plastic table cloth on top of it, staple it to the legs of the table, and flipping it upside down - now all we need is a sea to sail our ship! Most NT people would sacrifice a couple of kidneys for that talent ...!

This was the exact reason why Gandhi could "fix India", Bill Gates could put "one computer in front of [almost - my edit] every human being on the planet - running Microsoft Software" - and the author of X-Men [the comic book] could see the "next step" of human evolution ...

In fact, I think everything, including good morals and good ethics, can be rationalized. I've even had a couple of shots at it myself by defining evil as "forcing your will upon others", and good as "helping others have their will". I know Nietzsche had a shot at it, but I kind of like to think I succeeded where he failed ...

And if there's one thing evolution has thought us, is that it doesn't "create errors" - it ** CAN'T ** in fact! AS isn't a "bug", AS is something either given to mankind collectively to help facilitate the transition out of its current state of matters in regards to the problems we're facing today, like wars, CO2, etc. Or something given to the human genome to help evolve our specie. Mount Improbable doesn't have room for "bugs", every trail there only lead ** UP ** ...!

I see myself as "on a mission", or as "a device" put here by natural laws, to help fix some of the things we're collectively struggling with on this [wrong] planet - ...

When given a device capable of putting contexts too large for NT's to even comprehence the size of, into our central CPUs, I cannot possibly even imagine how that can be a "bug". Collectively we're here on these forums more capable, more philanthropic, and more resourceful than some smaller nations are put together ...

And just like the "Fabulous 4", we're here to protect those weaker than us, right ...?

But for that to happen, I am 100% certain that we'll need a shift of mind, and get out of our misery, stop staring at half-empty glasses, and embrace our state of mind ...!

"Be the change you want to see in the world" ...

... and I happen to think that we are the ** KEY ** ...!

With brains the size of planets, we cannot afford to run around like Marvins, and be super depressed, see only walls, and embrace our deficiency. The world need ** CHANGE **, and we can give it to it ...!

The bat signal is on the sky, do you have the courage to put on your cape ...?



pandd
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10 Mar 2010, 11:35 am

polterguy wrote:
The whole basis for why we're having difficulties in picking up social cues the way NT people can easily do, is our extreme abilities to focus and see details, right...?

Not necessarily. Note also fixation is not always an "ability" but can also be a liability.

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This makes us shut out the rest of the world, except that tiny little thing we're currently trying to focus on, which makes us "socially challenged" when we're in the zone, right ...?

Er, no. I am socially challenged all the time.

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When one have extreme abilities to focus and see details, as in higher abilities than others [NT people], that creates deep knowledge about whatever we at the moment are focusing on, right...?

Firstly, many of us have attention disorders and are not able to focus on things of interest, but might fixate on things that we really have no desire to fixate on. Secondly, not every interest is knowledge based or even reality based. One person I know with Aspergers is in his early twenties and is fixated on becoming the tallest man in the world. He has no hope of achieving this and fixates on it all day long. It ruins his week when he encounters people taller than he is. His knowledge about height and growth in humans is not comprehensive and is frankly unrealistic.

I cannot see what benefit I have received from any obsession I have. None have turned into a career and only very rarely do they even result in a conversation point. Evidently, one of my obsessions was Harry Potter for years. Plenty of non-Autistic people knew more about it than me though.

We are people not some nerd/geek/mega-genius/savant stereotype. Many of us have ordinary to less than average intelligence. Many of us have problems with attention and/or executive functioning, and learning disorders occur at a higher rate in our population than they do in the general population.
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I am an information junkie, that's why I know a lot of stuff. I am deeply interested in solving problems, always have been, always will be, that's why my brain are "trained", and that's why I'm "smart".

That seems a more realistic explanation than Aspergers Syndrome.
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I don't believe in "born IQ" or "genetically predisposed IQ". Now why I am an information junkie, and why I am "smart", I still am 100% certain of is because I am able to focus on tasks over a long period of time. So then again why am I able to focus on the same tasks, or read walls of technical texts about one narrow subject? Because I am able to shut out the world. What defines my "social problems"? My abilities to shut out the world! Or like NT shrinks would probably put it; "my incapability to shut *IN* the rest of the world" - or something ...
So, why am I defined as an Aspie? Because of my "social problems" - among other things ...

As noted above, plenty of people with AS do not have your abilities with information and they still "shut out" the rest of the world as per being Autistic.

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... those "other things" summed up can all be looked upon as two sides of the same coin. One side's a problem, the other side's a gift ...

So I don't see a separation at *ALL* between having AS and being "bright" to be honest...?

I know differently. There are people with AS whose cognitive abilities are well below average. It is not a stroke of genius to think you can become the tallest man in the world when you are not anywhere near as tall as the tallest man in the world and have reached the end of your development in terms of growth. AS and being "bright" are two entirely different things.
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I do not for the bare of my life understand how these two cannot walk hand in hand...?

Well it is not uncommon for people with AS to have learning difficulties, attention disorder, executive functioning difficulties and to be none-too-bright, so I suggest that your view on this matter is not realistic.

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I had a talk with a psychologist which claimed that AS' *** COULDN'T *** imagine.

She was exaggerating (although she may not have realized it); we are impaired in imagination, but not universally devoid of it so far as I can tell.
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The paradox is that I've spent my entire life *CURSING* that I was born with higher IQ than others, not because of the "social problems" that comes with being an AS - without even knowing it before the age of 35 - but because of the jealousy this brings me from others ...! I've had to spend large portions of my life *DEFENDING* myself and having to explain that I ** DO NOT ** think I am "more worth" than another human with 100 or less in IQ.

All my life I have known intelligent people who did not have this problem. Being intelligent is not a problem per say...the issues arises when one is intelligent and unable to carry it off socially. Many intelligent people do not have particular problems socially because they know how to behave in ways that do not unnecessarily provoke resentment or a desire in others to "cut them down a peg".
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One thing that strikes me is you've all got blogs. Some of you *SEVERAL* blogs too...! The average NT guy I know would first of all not have the passion needed to set one up, not even at blogspot dot com, not to mention change its skin and even add up a complex biography at it! Another thing that tells me is your level of *PASSION* and your inability to not share your deepest thoughts...! I bet you all have some sort of philanthropist reasons to set them up! I know that's why I write...

I strongly suspect the overwhelming majority of blogs are authored by non-Autistic people. Many Autistic people do not have blogs.
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Yes, I am uncomfortable with huge social contexts. Still I can cope! In fact I teach classes in my special interest, whenever I get a chance! I also speak at conferences - sometimes with hundreds of people attending as audience ...

Many of us find such formal semi-structured situations much easy than ordinary social interaction. I have never had an issue speaking at large groups of people.

Quote:
In fact, not having a "box" was part of the "foundation" of AS according to that shrink I talked about previously. So when a NT sees a table, he sees something to put his coffee on top of, when me and all you other AS' see a table, we see a potential boat, by putting on a big plastic table cloth on top of it, staple it to the legs of the table, and flipping it upside down - now all we need is a sea to sail our ship! Most NT people would sacrifice a couple of kidneys for that talent ...!

When I see a table, I see a table.
Quote:
And if there's one thing evolution has thought us, is that it doesn't "create errors" - it ** CAN'T ** in fact! AS isn't a "bug", AS is something either given to mankind collectively to help facilitate the transition out of its current state of matters in regards to the problems we're facing today, like wars, CO2, etc. Or something given to the human genome to help evolve our specie. Mount Improbable doesn't have room for "bugs", every trail there only lead ** UP ** ...!

The processes of evolution often results in dysfunctional creatures. Evolution has no intent; it does not give things for X or Y reason, it has no interest in perpetuating itself by causing next steps, and in fact describing evolution in terms of "next steps" is inaccurate and misleading.
Quote:
With brains the size of planets, we cannot afford to run around like Marvins, and be super depressed, see only walls, and embrace our deficiency. The world need ** CHANGE **, and we can give it to it ...!

There is no evidence that high intelligence occurs in our population at a higher rate than it occurs in the general population provided the sample bias (exclusion of people with sub-normal intelligence from the AS group) is controlled for.



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10 Mar 2010, 12:14 pm

polterguy wrote:
In fact, not having a "box" was part of the "foundation" of AS according to that shrink I talked about previously. So when a NT sees a table, he sees something to put his coffee on top of, when me and all you other AS' see a table, we see a potential boat, by putting on a big plastic table cloth on top of it, staple it to the legs of the table, and flipping it upside down - now all we need is a sea to sail our ship! Most NT people would sacrifice a couple of kidneys for that talent ...!



Most NT people had that talent as children. In fact, the lack of that talent in childhood is considered by doctors to be one of the "red flags" for autism. When my daughter was diagnosed with autism, one of the things that the doctors did was observe her with some toys and see if she was able to play with them in creative ways. She was not. They questioned me at great length about her play habits at home...did she ever use furniture or other household objects creatively? No. She did not. Unlike myself as a child, it never occured to her to upend the furniture and re-purpose it for creative play. Sometimes I would try to coax her in that direction by upending or re-purposing furniture or household objects and trying to get her to see it more imaginatively (this was a therapist's idea). Her response was to set the furniture or household object back how it was and become agitated that I was using it "wrong".

The question is, why do NT adults abandon or lose this childhood talent? According to what I've read, it is intentional abandonment of the talent in the name of "putting away childish things". Perhaps what happens is that AS people take longer to develop creative play (my daughter is slowly coming around to it) but once it is there, feel no need to intentionally abandon it in the name of "putting away childish things". The whole idea of abandoning something because it is not "age appropriate" (even if it is something useful like creative repurposing) does not seem to apply to AS people. There are a couple threads exploring this back in the archives.

. Einstein commented on it too. He theorized that it is very common for children to think about the big questions that he built his career on. But once they move into their teens, they stop pondering those things and consider it "childish" to do so. He felt that his slow development caused him to still be pondering those things at an age when others had moved on. The capacity is there- no need to sacrifice a kidney- what is often lacking is the motivation. So many adult concerns take over and people have a vague feeling that to be fully adult you really shouldn't think like that any more. You should "put away childish things" as a couple-millenia-old saying goes. Some people realize in midlife that they want to unbury that buried talent and there is a minor industry in helping people "recover your inner artist" by taking them back to a more childlike mindset so they can recover abandoned creativity. AS people, in contrast, never felt any particular need to abandon it in the first place once it got developed (as it does in some, not all) since there isn't the feel that one ought not to "act childish".