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Jingo8
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15 Mar 2010, 5:01 pm

maybe, i wouldn't know where to start other than back to the gp and hope for a referal to someone else who authorises some therapy or whatever, to be honest i'm not even sure what therapy actually means other than similar to counciling.

It'd be just another thing to deal with at the moment i think and i have more than enough trouble trying to work out and keep up with my current diagnostic stuff.



Toadstool
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03 Apr 2010, 4:31 am

I think it's a balance of accepting your own limitations and having realistic goals but not giving up completely.
I don't know how to do this yet.



Mysty
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03 Apr 2010, 12:52 pm

Jingo8 wrote:
Has anyone taken the decision to stop the constant effort of pretending and go live life the easy route? What are your experiences?


I can't quite see how this question relates to the discussion in this thread and to the original question (as quoted) before the post was edited, but, still, I want to share my thought on this question, on pretending.

Me, I decided in Jr. High that, well, basically, that pretending wasn't going to work. Which didn't make the alternative easy. It didn't make me value myself. It didn't give me a social circle where I fit in. Those came much later, with effort and luck.


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TurboGirl
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06 Apr 2010, 6:39 am

Jingo, you sound like you're in a right downward spiral :( They're hard to put the brakes on but if you look round the folk who have run, you'll often see that the problems are still there, just with different surroundings. Don't feel you have to live up to other folks expectations on how you relate to your daughter. Thats up to you two. Find some good stuff to try out and do with the family to build up some positive feeling around you all, take pictures to reinforce it, turn out some stuff that makes you feel good and viable.... look for the opportunity to flip your feelings around and capitalise on it when it happens!


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Element333
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06 Apr 2010, 11:14 pm

Jingo8 wrote:
Has anyone taken the decision to stop the constant effort of pretending and go live life the easy route? What are your experiences?


Sorry, but I'm not sure I understand the question (above) that others in this thread seem to be able to answer right away. What sort of pretending? What is the "easy route?"

I've always been "me" and no matter how hard I tried to feel like I was part of society, it never worked. Ever. Even now at 42, I'm pushed aside by everyone I know and by those I don't, and it has depressed me to the point where I have to talk myself into seeing each day through. I'm supposed to be seeing doctors for some pretty significant health problems as of late, but I'm so close to utter shut-down mode that I forgot to go to a pre-op appointment for a much-needed biopsy. Truth is, I don't care. If I cared, I would have remembered the appointment. I've already lost everything in life I'd worked so hard to gain, and that's a lot less than most typical people have. The more time passes, the less I'm able to cope. There is no kind of "pretending" for me. There is no "easy life." People in my family who are worse off than I am depend on me to care for them, but I'm getting to the point where I can't do it any longer. There's no one else in my life to rely on now except myself, and if I fail, then what? There's no safety net for me, no "easy life." If there is, someone please tell me how to get there. I could use a vacation.

E333