Why is it so wrong to love animals more than people?

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I recently confessed to my mother that I love my bearded dragon more than I have ever been able to love anyone. I asked if that was wrong and she said yes. I asked why and she goes on about how I am supposed to value my family the most. Even as young as two I felt rejected by my parents because I wasn't what they wanted me to be and even today are sometimes very mean to me for reasons I can't control. My mom is even going on about how I need to give up on meerkats because I will never be able to work with them? I ask why can't I go to school and become a vet or something and she never gives an answer. Why is it so wrong to love animals more than people?

I have this hunch that it's actually very NORMAL. You can hug and touch an animal plenty, which presumably releases oxytocin, the bonding hormone. Humans don't hug and touch much even if they know each other very well, thus, less oxytocin rampaging around your brain and a less acute feeling of bonding.

Anyone know whether I'm correct on this?

While I definitely don't agree with you about loving animals more than people, I wouldn't say you are wrong for it. You are not even alone in it, there are many people who love their pets more than their kids/spouses. There is expected to be a certain amount of solidarity for your own species built into our psyche. That allows us to survive and propagate as a species. But since we are in no danger of extinction I think that people could stand to be a bit more forgiving of your choice in the matter. It's a personal choice who and what you love, and as long as you don't engage in criminal activity over it, then it's not the business of anyone else but you.

It is an evolutionary advantage.
If one would love other animals more than humans, they would be less likely to procreate and would be less reluctant to approach some more dangerous animals, which would in turn increase their chances of dying.
Humans and all other animals are mostly incapable of thinking outside of those predetermined values and presets.
I actually value computers more than either, although I cannot hug them and they are largely incapable of performing comedy.
I also cannot eat them.

It is also funny that people think children are born as blank slates, while they are not.
Their entire personality is predetermined in the womb, long before birth.
Male fetuses, for example get a testosterone burst somewhere in the forming of them, which makes them male.
This makes them more prone to extreme deviations from the norm, because testosterone influences the brain lots, too.
Or even less extreme deviations from the norm, such as left-handedness.
But I digress lots.

I know why someone would think that, but I do not think that, so, as with all human behaviour, I can only rationally approach it with evolutionary theories but I cannot sympathize, much less empathize.
I like science, it is so useful.

I admit that I love animals more than people. They're easier to get along with, and I love to hug them.

I love my kittypuss moare than I would some
human.

I'd brake hard and fast for a kittypuss
I don't care if someone rear ends me or
the guy behind them.

I don't drive anymore.

I'd take a bullet for my cat.

There's no reason why you couldn't work for the RSPCA or your country's equivalent. At 23, you're probably leaving it a bit late to go to veterinary school.

Last edited by EnglishInvader on 14 Mar 2010, 6:40 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I'm not sure why people think it is wrong to enjoy an animal's company more than humans. I love spending time with my dogs, I find it, on the whole, very relaxing. They also make me feel 100% loved which I don't get from people.

Why? All it would mean is that she would be older than average when she graduated. I don't see why this is a problem.

The same reason why it's wrong to love objects more than people.

See: it's not wrong at all.

You are still young and can certainly go to college. My mom was in her 40s when she got her degree, and she was the first one in the family. Gather all the information about veterinary school and see if you could commit to the program. If not, start volunteering at shelters to get your resume built up and take classes. You might find you would be happier as a vet assistant or in another animal field.

I think it is sad that your parents don't encourage you to go for your dreams, but I think the folks here can make up for that and cheer you on.

As for your question- no it is understandable if you love animals more. Their love is truly unconditional, they are never disappointed in you, and they are always happy to see you. I cant say I love my animals more than my mom or daughter, but I do care more about them than I do most people.

I think extremely social people persons often don't understand why anyone would love animals more than they love people--and it makes them uncomfortable. By saying it's wrong they are voicing that discomfort.Consequently they then try to repress or eliminate parts of other people's personality that make them uneasy. But really, who are they kidding?

They associate with people because they're comfortable with people. If the tables were turned and people persons were the minority, an autistic person(or anyone who loves animals for that matter) might tell them it's wrong to love people more than they love animals! It's a ludicrous assumption to say that someone else should want what I want.They might have their own ideas.

So I wouldn't feel bad about loving animals more than people in the least.Now if you'll excuse me I'm going to go hug my kitty before she commandeers the keyboard and demands a belly rub!

Last edited by Dark_Red_Beloved on 15 Mar 2010, 4:58 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I love animals much more than people. They're prettier, and their nice to hug, especially cats. Not to mention fun. My kitty can always make me laugh.

Who are they to tell you your love is wrong? About a year ago, I explained to my parents that I love my tubas as much as I do the humans with whom I have the closest relationships, and I love them just as much as I do Mia, the mean, old cat I have had since I was six.

I love my dog and cat. They don't judge me. I feed and pet them, and they love me back. Animals don't play games when you show them kindness. They simply return the favor. So much for being an "intelligent" species where kindness is the equivalent of weakness in some cases.

My pets don't judge me or tease me or try to have boring conversations with me. They just want food and pats and my warm lap to sit on at night. I love my two cats and wish I could show love to a dog. I loved my dog so much that I had to give her up to save her.
I don't think it's not normal. It's just different and generally looked at by some people as weird.
I've been that little girl from Charlotte's web all my life.