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Cad
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29 Mar 2010, 8:32 pm

my first bf was in primary school so basically only puppy love lol. That said, we still have a very strong connection and are close friends, even if we don't bump into each other for a year :D



hale_bopp
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29 Mar 2010, 8:34 pm

i've been involved with several guys, thought I loved two of them, Then I realised I only loved the second one. He didn't love me back and now lives overseas, i'm having real trouble moving on. He will always hold a place in my heart.



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29 Mar 2010, 8:38 pm

My first crush, no.
The first person who I was in love with, yes.
I met him when when I was in my first year of university, and he was one of the first people who I really "connected" with, and a really nice person. We had a good friendship, and I spent a lot of time figuring out how to take things further, but not taking action. Unfortunately for me, he got a girlfriend (one of his friends who he'd known for a lot longer than me) and ended up marrying her. Then he lost contact with me, which kind of hurt, because I valued the friendship, and, from the point where I knew about his girlfriend, I never would have tried for more than friendship.
I wouldn't want to be with him today, partly for personal reasons, and partly because he already has someone who he is (as far as I know) very happy with.


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poopylungstuffing
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30 Mar 2010, 12:34 am

oh gee...the first guy who really wrecked my brain stayed with me for a number of years...and I would seek parts of him out in other people who I would try to date...not necc. intentionally...it just sorta turned out that way.
My very ASish friend...who I like a LOT better on many different levels has his same birthday....but is a year older...some similar features...similar political views..
He contacted me several months ago and told me he was diagnosed as being BPD....I told him it turned out I was ASish.....Told him about my friend who has his birthday....ended up most likely creeping him out again...have no desire to communicate with him further, or if I do, it soon passes...


Um...howyousay...


before that....I had a my 7 year kindasorta loveless relationship....and um....a long crush on a guy from jr. high/high school, who I still often wonder about, mostly because he lost both his parents and then seemed to kinda fall off the face of the earth..though he stopped talking to me when we were still in high school, and I went down a more waywardly path....



alana
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30 Mar 2010, 6:12 am

it was not my first love, actually it was the last relationship I had that eclipsed all the others. I think because we both tried so hard to be present and make it work even though we were not compatible. She was everything I ever wanted. Probably if we came within 50 feet of each other we would end up in bed together even still. But it just wasn't/isn't ever going to work.



Gremmie
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30 Mar 2010, 11:17 am

I think I might be on my first love right now... I think it might be actually love anyway... it's hard to tell without a proper definition. I've definately never felt like this about anyone before - it's actually insane but in a good way. :)



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30 Mar 2010, 3:22 pm

I had a crush on someone, once. He turned out to be a real jerk, and he had AS. Not all aspies are nice, and not all NTs are jerks.


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30 Mar 2010, 4:32 pm

DavidM wrote:
Everybody's first love is themselves and everyone spends the rest of their lives pretending that they don't love themselves more than they do others.


That's nonsense. I don't bother pretending.

I still think of my first love now and then. I even see her around, and I chat politely with her. She's all married and stuff now. I don't really want to be with her again, but for a very long time I did.


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30 Mar 2010, 7:11 pm

The first person I was actually in love with wasn't my first boyfriend and I spent years as a very close friend and confidante of his before we became romantically involved, though people had suspected he had a crush on me before (though he was with other girls or chasing other girls at the time). He completely broke my heart and betrayed me on very deep levels and traumatized me. I'm finally getting to the point where I can think of him more distantly, and while I wish we could be very good friends again, the past makes it too difficult and I get scared even seeing his first name somewhere. I'm sure I will never forget him and even if I forgive him completely I will probably always be scared of him on some level. It makes me really sad to think about, though, and I go back and forth on my opinion of him and feelings toward him. Since then I've gotten back together with another boy I used to be with (though after I had fallen in love with the other boy, before I had an opportunity to be romantic with the other boy). I love this other boy and I'm much more compatible with him, but the trauma that happened with my first love lingers.



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31 Mar 2010, 6:31 am

I fell into an insane, unrequited love of someone (probably because she was one of very few people at school to treat me as more than an object of fun) when I was about thirteen, and stayed that way for most of the following decade, even when we no longer saw each other at all. I'd spent too long reading about the romantic ideal of one love forever and always. :? Very, very stupid. I've not seen her for a long time; dunno how I'd react if we met again, but I strongly doubt that I would go all slack-jawed and drooling. :lol:


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happymusic
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01 Apr 2010, 6:26 pm

I have a hard time sorting out the categories like first love and crushes and stuff. For all the people who caught my eye in the past, though, I don't think I'd go back. Done is done. But I think that depends on the person, I've just been with people I'd rather not revisit - nothing wrong with them, it's just actually over.



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01 Apr 2010, 7:34 pm

hanazai wrote:
How true is this?

Not true at all.

Most of the girls I fancied in the past I still fancy, at least a little bit, and I'd still go out with them unless I have trust issues of my own with them. But there are many, not one.



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02 Apr 2010, 4:07 am

not true. But it was mainly silly crushes unrequited. Now I think I really love someone who seems to love me ... unless he plans to jilt me now I told him I have AS. It's more than hero-worship, it's intellectual, transcendental, accepting, nurturing. I don't think I'll ever forget him even if he dumps me, and I am so scared he will.