I should start by saying that I'm not out at work. I mean that as Asperger's out, not gayness out (literalists FTW).
I have pretty much the most Asperger's possible job: I analyze data for a freight railroad. I KNOW! It wasn't until after I was working in that role before I started thinking of myself in terms of Asperger's, because the diagnosis for males looks so different than us ladies.
I was finally motivated to post today because of difficulties at work. Holla if you hear me: it is maddening when people read malevolent or haughty intentions from you when there are none. For example, I'll propose a possible solution in a meeting without real attachment to it, but for the rest of the meeting I am treated as being fiercely unyielding in my commitment to the idea. It makes me defensive that I was just throwing out an idea and I'm not that attached to it. And boom, the second they see you on the defense they get their wedge in the door and start wheedling. And I feel played, frustrated, and hopeless that people are actually interested in solving the problem, rather than achieving some meaningless social dominance in the meeting setup. It doesn't help that I'm the only female, and more than 20 years younger than the next youngest person in the room. So it's hard to separate the otherness of demographic from the otherness of my weird asperger's behavior.
I'm married, no kids.
I'm desperately trying to figure out how to proceed in my professional life so... misunderstood. If there's a subgroup of people looking for work support, please let me know.
My dad is clearly (CLEARLY) aspie, though undiagnosed. I'm convinced of my own diagnosis and have an appt for tomorrow morning to start the diagnosis process.
I'm having a hard time finishing my master's degree. It's killing me - if there's a sub-community here for people having a hard time finishing a degree, please get in touch. I finished my undergrad in 8 years and my master's is 4 years going now. Does this sound familiar to anyone else?
29 Mar 2010, 1:32 pm
