Is it a aspie thing to get upset over a little thing?
I get upset over little things. They bewilder me, and preoccupy me. I have to figure them out, so I either do, or I don't, in which case I don't deal with them. That part tends to upset people, and they don't see it coming, because they take me for granted.
On the other hand, I also don't get upset over other things. I can avoid getting upset about things that are potentially upsetting if I have figured out what's real and what's not and I have understood it and have not been misled by flawed information. Misinforming me, by lies or omissions, is like gagging a normal person. There's no such thing here as telling her 'on a need-to-know basis' or 'what she doesn't know won't hurt her'. I use information the way a blind person uses Braille. It cannot be misleading or I will topple over.
A most upsetting thing which can sometimes seem minor to others if I should happen to mention it is if I have made a huge, huge effort to ask for something to be different than what it is, ie something bothers me enough that I a) find words to express it b) make the effort to express them c) trust the other person enough to expect them to care and listen to me, and then they ignore me. This is excruciatingly painful, and the pain of it is added on top of the original grievance, which was painful enough to begin with for me to try to address it.
FOR THIS REASON I RESERVE THE RIGHT NOT TO SPEAK. If they have the right to talk trash at every turn and at anyone's expense then I have the right to keep my careful, thoughtful words to myself.
Enough said. This has been a bit of a rant.
One of the things that used to annoy me and get me upset is when my instant messenger's stops working and unfortunately my AIM wasn't working very well last night, it was refusing to sign me in and everything and I just updated the blooming thing and that would used to make me cry.
Now I realise, oh... maybe it's probably just a one off? Is it?
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Yes, it definitely is--at least to get upset over things that other people think are "little things". See the thread I started earlier today about disappointment for an example. In another sense, though, I think that to us many things that NTs get upset over seem trivial as well, like someone in class looking at them the wrong way (I guess that is more a teenage thing, but still, I don't hear of aspie teenagers doing this sort of thing).
I also think that NTs tend to be more flexible, hence less upset about things going their way, and also for them, many of the "minor" things that really upset them would also upset many other people, and so they don't feel alone about it (I think the feeling of misunderstanding is often as much a cause of getting upset as the actual thing).
Also, contrary to one of the other posters in this thread, I almost never forget something I was upset about, until it's corrected. I may not care about it for a while, sometimes for months or years, but the next time I'm upset about one thing, ALL the other things I was upset about and couldn't solve come back.
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