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NullChamber
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18 Apr 2010, 6:55 am

I may have Asperger's albeit a mild form; i show some of the traits like focusing on my thoughts, occasional inattentiveness, persistent lack of eye contact (when i have to talk to others, not vice versa), pedantic (as they say) and overly detailed style of speech, and not being very in tune to other's (or my own) emotions or reciprocating. i should say the aforementioned symptoms aren't just my observations they're also observations made by my therapist. however, he wouldn't diagnose since i don't show enough traits.

the inattentiveness and daydreaming has subsided a lot since i started taking stuff like ginkgo biloba, acetyl-l-carnitine. Prior to the vitamins my ability to learn new subjects was terrible because of my lack of attention, which also caused me to make frequent mistakes/faux paus, which led to frequent negative reactions (mosty disdain) from others, all of which (probably) led to a social anxiety diagnosis.

Before social anxiety therapy, i was hospitalized for depression, but curiously diagnosed psychotic depressive even though there weren't any hallucinations/delusions. What I most recall was being so stuck inside my mind that whenever I tried to speak to other's i stammered excessively and it took a long time for me to say what I wanted to. After I started taking the vitamins (which was after the futile sa therapy) I could honestly say that I felt like a completely different person, and gradually my self esteem got a huge boost, which ultimately eradicated my social anxiety (aside from the lack of eye contact.) however my mind still wanders too much and sometimes i feel like my mind is going in a million directions without being focused on the present (it's not anxiety or racing thoughts or add (as my therapist ruled out saying i 'don't fit the profile'))

- considering what i've mentioned so far, is there such a thing as "mild" asperger's or am i splitting hairs? if there is, do the behaviors i laid out fit that profile? how would "mild" cases differ from "regular" ones?

-Please tell me what you think of all this. I'd like to think that there's some kind of explanation out there for my past experiences and behaviors compared with how I am now. I would REALLY appreciate it!

(btw, I know that Asperger's isn't technically considered a disorder anymore in the DSM-V, but really I'm not looking for a diagnosis, I'm just looking for some kind of confirmation)



Last edited by NullChamber on 18 Apr 2010, 7:07 am, edited 2 times in total.

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18 Apr 2010, 7:02 am

I don't think there is such thing as a "regular" case, because it's different for everyone. You get very severe, severe, moderate, mild etc and everything else in between.
And you get milder traits than others, I am classed as a mild case but all my traits differ in severity, even though my social problems are mild enough my tendency to get lost in my own world is quite a severe trait for me. I think the way a mild case would differ from a moderate-severe case would probably be that you are more likely to make friends or live independently if you are mild than if you are severe, depending on whether you have any comorbids or not.


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x_amount_of_words
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18 Apr 2010, 12:05 pm

Sometimes they diagnose this as PDD-Nos. Which means that you don't fully meet the criteria.


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Willard
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18 Apr 2010, 12:43 pm

NullChamber wrote:
(btw, I know that Asperger's isn't technically considered a disorder anymore in the DSM-V


There is no DSM-V. There won't be one for another two years, and there has not yet been a determination made as to whether AS will remain or be folded into one of several levels on a spectrum.

In any case, Asperger Syndrome will still be considered a disorder and no doubt the term will persist within the community of Mental Health professionals for some time to come, even if it isn't used as an official diagnosis in patient file records.

IMO, If a case of AS is mild enough to be considered mild, it doesn't require diagnosis. If it isn't causing you disabling problems, then need it even be called Autism? Why label something that's ultimately insignificant to begin with?

And if it is disrupting your life in a significant way, then it's effects are hardly mild, no matter how high functioning you may appear.

I don't appear Autistic at first glance, if you don't know what to look for, you might know me for months and never suspect - but the associated behaviors have created havoc in my personal and professional life for decades. Is that mild? Not to me, it isn't.



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18 Apr 2010, 1:55 pm

I was in a very similar place to the OP a few weeks ago. My first post on this website was a query about whether or not to seek diagnosis and treatment, and I represented myself as having a "mild", "high functioning" case of Asperger's Syndrome. The cranky gentleman posting above me let me know that we *all* think that when we first recognize our autism. It sounds like your symptoms are disabilitating to you in your social and emotional life, and that you are suffering from a host of common comorbid symptoms as a result of that. You have been misdiagnosed as psychotic because it shares some major symptoms with autism. Autistics and schizophrenics both have above-normal sensory perception, and can be very distractable and anxious as a result; schizophrenics exhibit disordered thought and speech, which autistic rants can resemble if the train of thought is not clearly laid out; both groups also engage in repetitive motions, especially with their hands. Since the popular conception of autism is retardedness, and you are clearly not retarded, you may have been misdiagnosed. You should look for a psychologist who specializes in adults with pervasive developmental disorders. That's what I did (my consultation is on Wednesday), and I am becoming more at peace with myself than I have ever felt, just from having done that.

Good luck. Don't let them beat you down.
-ck



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18 Apr 2010, 2:54 pm

x_amount_of_words wrote:
Sometimes they diagnose this as PDD-Nos. Which means that you don't fully meet the criteria.


What does PDD-Nos stand for? And is there any other definition for it other than "mild aspergers"?



Willard
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18 Apr 2010, 4:30 pm

cthulukitty wrote:
The cranky gentleman posting above me



You may interpret my demeanor in any way that suits you, but please refrain from name-calling.


'gentleman', indeed. :roll:



Last edited by Willard on 19 Apr 2010, 7:43 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Magicfly
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19 Apr 2010, 5:32 am

I was diagnosed with mild Aspergers, my psychologist's biggest issue in diagnosing me was apparently that I'm not like any other ASD/AS person she has ever met before, but having said that she was easily able to 'tick all the boxes' on the DSM-IV... (I'm going to assume it was because I am female, lesbian, and in my 30's, once I get to know a person I can be quite chatty and exceptionally verbose!!)

I do agree with her assessment in that I am at the milder end of the spectrum, but, she did recognise that mild or not, it's something that constantly manifests itself in my life, some days are good and some are a real struggle.....

Mild doesn't mean that it's not affecting you, but at the same time I understand there's that thin line where it becomes so mild, is it worth diagnosing?
For me, yes it was as up until that point I had battled my entire life with depression and tenuous social links/experiences, being called a weirdo, having no friends, changing schools due to bullying, being taken advantage of or being socially isolated by people in the plcaes I worked, finding out the reason to my 'f*ckuperry' was a huge positive.
Now I know why I'm 'socially retarded' I can let go of it all, mostly, the burning self-awareness/embarrassment I have had since I was a very small child, the constant awareness that something was wrong with me, the freakouts in crowds, the unbareable sensory overloads I have had since I was a baby......

I think part of the process of diagnosis should include looking back over your life, not just looking at how you function now. I've always had this. I was first taken to be assessed when I was only 2 due to extreme freakouts, rocking, lining up my toys and then smashing them in a temper.
Back in those days (1979) there was no diagnosis of Aspergers.

My point is that you have to look for examples that would fit the DSM from ALL of your life, ask parents/family for input if it helps...........



edel
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19 Apr 2010, 7:05 am

PDD nos stands for pervasive developmental disorder not otherwise specified



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19 Apr 2010, 7:11 am

NullChamber wrote:
(btw, I know that Asperger's isn't technically considered a disorder anymore in the DSM-V)



incorrect. This is the most annoying thing about the DSM-V issue: individuals casually familiar with autism are making all kinds of statements about Asperger's status in the DSM-V that just aren't true. As Willard notes, the DSM V doesn't exist yet, and when it is finally published, Aspergers will still be a disorder, but may simply be regarded as a subtype of the more general classification of "autism spectrum disorder".



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20 Apr 2010, 3:00 am

Willard wrote:
I don't appear Autistic at first glance, if you don't know what to look for, you might know me for months and never suspect - but the associated behaviors have created havoc in my personal and professional life for decades. Is that mild? Not to me, it isn't.

If this is prying, and you'd prefer to keep it to yourself, feel free not to answer; But I'm curious, how does your autism affect you? My own situation could be described somewhat like yours, in that it's not really apparent to anyone unless they look close, but I'm myself crippled in some elements of independent adult living. Everything else is quite mild, akin to how NullChamber appears to be describing.



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02 Jul 2010, 4:36 pm

Right, I don't know if this has got anything to do with was this forum is about, but read carefully. First, 3 abbreviated words: WTF???? Listen to some ridiculous symptoms what apparently ONLY Aspies have and NTs DON'T - according to the symptoms given on the internet. Listen and listen good, old Beans:-
Aspies may appear rude
Ahem. Excuse me - where did that drivel come from? Hello?! !! I know lots and lots and lots of NTs who are rude. I work in a shop and almost every customer now a days have some sort of rude manners. (Apart from the old people). Some grumpy woman came up to the counter to pay for something, and I looked up at her - made eye contact and smiled - and she just stuck her bottom lip out miserably and didn't even want to look at me. Now, how rude and unsociable is that? I was guessing she was an NT. I bet she was. As she walked out of the shop her phone rang and I heard her talking about some social garden party she was having with lots of mates. How could she have lots of mates and hold garden parties when she can't even be bothered to be friendly and polite to a cashier?
Aspies take everything literally
That is Autism. Aspies do not take everything literally. I always laugh at a joke, and I always know someone is joking - by the tone of their voice (which apparently Aspies also find difficult).

The internet makes out Aspies to be some sort of little problem-factories, which means everything they do, say and think are some sort of a problem which NTs don't have. Wrong. Wrong, wrong, wrong. If you get to know an NT really well, you'll find that half the problems you face are exactly the same as the ones they face.
Aspergers is supposed to be some sort of a mild condition involving a few social anxieties - but it's got lots of other things connected to it too, so it says.
Listen carefully: Aspies are normal

1. My Auntie was with a control-freak. He wasn't an Aspie but he was bloody weird and didn't behave like a human at all.
2. I hear a lot on the news about child abusers. Aspergers is never mentioned in the cruel parents.
3. My collegue got Agoraphobia - very bad. She hated crowds at the best of times, and getting this condition made it worse. She didn't have no Aspergers.
4. My brother used to be really popular at school. Since he left, he become depressed and shy - and no drugs were involved. He's now his worst enemy. He was never diagnosed as Aspergers or even no symptoms were reckognised.
5. My Mum's friend's children never went to school because of major panic attacks. But they were perfectly normal, and now they are working and have made lots of friends and are even invited to all-night parties. They never had Aspergers.
6. A 23 year old lad who lives in our street bawls and cries if he's split up from his girlfriend. I heard he stamped about at work and slouched off not speaking to anyone. It was practically a melt-down. He doesn't have Aspergers - I used to play with him when I was little.
7. Another lad in our neighbourhood got these really weird obsessions with my Mum when he was 14, and started stalking her and breaking in to steal her underwear. What NT does that? But the schools said he was fine with social development - no Asperger symptoms were reckognised in him.
8. My Auntie's friend is single, but she gets these crazes for men, and gets herself involved with them, even if they are married, and I heard a lot of men are laughing at her behind her back. But nobody said anything about Aspergers.

I can't think of any more - but here are 8 examples of some NTs I know full well, and they have weird sides to them. Aspies do better than these!

NTs are perfect says all the Aspies in the world. This is wrong. The internet just exaggerates. Don't take it all so seriously. Nobody on this planet is perfect. Even insects are individuals. The other day a moth flew into my bedroom and was fluttering all round me and looked happy that I was standing there. But another moth came in and stayed behind the curtain - he didn't want to show is cute little body. This moth might have been shy, whilst the other one might have been bold.
See - believe it or not, even insects have their own personality.

Have a nice day wink



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02 Jul 2010, 6:35 pm

Magicfly wrote:
I was diagnosed with mild Aspergers, my psychologist's biggest issue in diagnosing me was apparently that I'm not like any other ASD/AS person she has ever met before, but having said that she was easily able to 'tick all the boxes' on the DSM-IV... (I'm going to assume it was because I am female, lesbian, and in my 30's, once I get to know a person I can be quite chatty and exceptionally verbose!!)

I do agree with her assessment in that I am at the milder end of the spectrum, but, she did recognise that mild or not, it's something that constantly manifests itself in my life, some days are good and some are a real struggle.....

Mild doesn't mean that it's not affecting you, but at the same time I understand there's that thin line where it becomes so mild, is it worth diagnosing?
For me, yes it was as up until that point I had battled my entire life with depression and tenuous social links/experiences, being called a weirdo, having no friends, changing schools due to bullying, being taken advantage of or being socially isolated by people in the plcaes I worked, finding out the reason to my 'f*ckuperry' was a huge positive.
Now I know why I'm 'socially retarded' I can let go of it all, mostly, the burning self-awareness/embarrassment I have had since I was a very small child, the constant awareness that something was wrong with me, the freakouts in crowds, the unbareable sensory overloads I have had since I was a baby......

I think part of the process of diagnosis should include looking back over your life, not just looking at how you function now. I've always had this. I was first taken to be assessed when I was only 2 due to extreme freakouts, rocking, lining up my toys and then smashing them in a temper.
Back in those days (1979) there was no diagnosis of Aspergers.

My point is that you have to look for examples that would fit the DSM from ALL of your life, ask parents/family for input if it helps...........


This sounds pretty much exactly like me. I am also female, lesbian, a talker (since childhood), and 30. I also believe I have a mild form of AS and it would feel good to know for sure.



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19 Jul 2010, 4:03 pm

All I can say about about Aspergers is that it's a very cruel thing to have, and it's cruel to let people live with it. I mean, there's Down's Syndrome, Tourrettes Syndrome, Dyspraxia, Dyslexia, Fragile X Syndrome, Soto's Syndrome, Alzheimer's disease, ADHD - I'd far rather have one of these than AS, if I had to. I've met some people with one of these conditions, and they all seemed happier than me. They at least have a LIFE.
Well, maybe Dementia people don't, but they don't know that they haven't got a life. And at least they've had a life.
I've been different from day 1. My mother felt sick throughout the whole time of being pregnant with a waste-of-person like me, and I cried a lot as a baby, and I was a miserable toddler, and I gave everybody grief when I started school, I never been able to make friends, I argued with my cousins all through my childhood, I got stupid obsessions when I was a teenager and fell out with friends because of it, now I've got no other life so I cling onto my mother. . . I've been a bain on everyone's life to this very day and I'm not proud of it. So why should I happily go upto a job interviewer and happily smile and say, ''I have Aspergers, by the way''.
I might aswell be saying ''I'm a bain on everyone's life, by the way''. Because that is another word for Aspergers.
And another thing - I've never known a condition to have so many symptoms!!
Down's Syndrome may be bad to have, but it doesn't have as many symptoms as this AS does. I mean, everything I do in every day life is a struggle, and it's so difficult to live with.

I might aswell be f*****g dead. The only life I'll ever have and I have to be stuck this s**t.
Nobody ELSE in my family has this, so WHY ME?????! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! :evil: :evil: :evil: :evil:

Could do without it.



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18 Dec 2010, 1:52 pm

I am going to apologize now because this is going to get very long....I have been kinda seeing a guy for 1/1/2. He has a great job and has many responsibilities. We are not official becauseof a few things, he is somewhat hung up on his ex girlfriend, that he just can't seem to let go of and he likes being single. Regardless, we are very close. Recently, we were in a discussion where I stated that my sister thought he had asperger's syndrome. My sister studied the syndrome and when she first met him mentioned it. I always had it in the back of my head and never said much because I didnt know much of what it was. The night I mentioned it, he wanted me to google it and what we found was shocking. There were so many similarities. I could tell he was releived to know he wasnt the only one that felt the way he does. He was very interested in knowing more, so we read about it for hours.

There are so many things that describe him, but then so many things that dont. The next night we rented the movie "ADAM", which was a great movie, but wasn't my friend.

I think rather than getting into to many stories I will just describe him. I would love to hear what anyone has to say about him and if they think he has aspergers. I am a terrible writer and have a hard time putting thoughts into words, but I don't know where else to get answers.

-When young he was very shy and often had to wisper what he needed into his mothers ear rather than share with the person that could give him the item.
-He is a tall guy and has amazing athletic abilities, especially football. Clumsyness is often talked about, which he does not have.
-He is a great speaker when it is about a subject he is familiar and confident with. He has great eye contact and sounds very professional. Def. has a monotone voice.
-He is very controlling. If he doesn't have control things are not ok.
-He has a routine for sure, but it doesnt seem different from other people I know. He gets up at the same time, eats, cleans up little messes that drive him crazy, runs, takes a shower, gets dressed, goes to work.
-He is somewhat obsessed with money. Doesnt want to hoard it. He invests in real estate and is really good with managing money. He has a very hard time putting money into anything that will not be making him more money in the future. He has a spreadsheet that shows him what his net worth is at all times, depending on what he pays on what. This may be normal, but is something I haven't seen other do in my life. He is very concerned with being fiscally responsible. He is amazing with numbers.
-In the past I have blamed many quirky, somewhat wierd things on him being hurt very badly by his ex girlfriend. The more I read though, I am unsure if that is it. He has a hard time letting go of the past or forgiving.
-I am a very logical thinker myself....can deal with the way he is because I understand him wanting to be single and still having feelings for his ex gf....I do not need or want to push him into anything until he is ready, but I have been having a hard time because he tells me how emotional I am...I have so many emotions and it overwhelms him and gives him anxiety....but I am not emotional at all....I have feelings that I feel sometimes don't get understood correctly and becomes frustrating....every other person in my life tells me how unemotional I am and that I think a lot like a man. With this said, I beleive the problem we are running into is the lack of empathy. I see this with many other people in his life. He really doesnt seem to understand other peoples feelings.
-He has abloslutely no problem talking with his friends and is portrayed as being very confident and to outsiders arrogant. He seems to have it all together. Doesnt do much that is new or foreign to him, therefore everything he does he is almost an expert at. The problem arises when he is suppose to be social with people that he isnt familiar with. For example, meeting my parents or new friends, it scares him and brings on so much anxiety. I never want to make him do it. I think he feels he will be judged.
-He says when he sees face expressions or people using non verbal ways of feelings he knows what he should do, he realizes it, but has to push himself to do the correct thing, it isnt natural.
-He has a very high pain tolerance
-Our relationship is very strange. He likes to be able to depend on me for things and when I forget or don't do exactly what I normally do he gets irritated with me. Lately, I feel like everything is my fault. If I tell him I like him, he will say "Stop it" or "no". If I want something or want to give him affection, he fights against me. He doesnt give compliments, but sometimes I feel like he doesnt want to be too nice to me for whatever his reasons are or maybe his past relationship. I know this gets long, but I just dont know if this is his personality or something he can't help. He likes to play games, control games with words or texts to make me feel inadequate.
-He is a huge flirt and very good with women. He has so many women wanting to be with him and giving him much affection. This gets hard because I feel that I want to be with him forever and we can deal with anything, but so do so many other women. I think this confuses him also, he doesnt completely understand why we all feel the exact same way, so to him it seems, and his buddies have a hard time finding even one woman to give them half the effection he gets from any of us.
-he has extreme anxiety at times. Writes lists about everything. He can't relax until his list is done. Gets very cranky if he is unable to get everything accomplished. Sometimes I swear he makes up things to put on the list.
-There are million other characteristics I could explain, but I think I have covered the main ones. any advice is greatly appreciated.

I think he is definetly aspergers, but to what extent I dont know....and what we can do about it I don't know either.



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18 Dec 2010, 2:03 pm

cthulukitty wrote:
Since the popular conception of autism is retardedness, and you are clearly not retarded, you may have been misdiagnosed.


Sorry to just pull one quote out like this. But you can't actually tell that about a person by the quality of their writing. I know someone who finished at least two university degrees and wrote a best-selling book before finding out she was "retarded". (And yes she was impaired in all of the other areas besides just IQ below 70.) Lots of "retarded" people can pass for nondisabled in person and in writing.


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