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Moog
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28 Apr 2010, 4:59 am

I can be somewhat leadery. People often take my suggestions well, and sometimes look to me to make judgements. But I prefer not to have the responsibility.


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Ladarzak
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28 Apr 2010, 6:41 am

> I prefer not to be a leader, but I will often try and take charge of a situation lest chaos ensue.

Yeah, me too. And I have been a leader, and have been appreciated for it. But I'm never popular, never really feel liked as a person outside my leader role. I can't connect. :roll:



ursaminor
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28 Apr 2010, 7:17 am

Need followers.
Make jokes sometimes, not really leadership though.
Do not really lead in anything as I usually do not know what I have to say to lead.



danmac
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28 Apr 2010, 7:26 am

I have always stayed in the shadows(I think of myself as a sniper)but have always had friends
I don't lie and hate it when people do it around me, I can lend an ear when poeple need to get something off there chest,
and gen.like to do good for the world and spread smiles though out the day.with out knowing it I became one.I don't like the position but I like that I'm a good example to people.I jioned a softball team and was voted team captin and I declined, they told me I realy don't have to do anything but I still declined.


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ToughDiamond
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28 Apr 2010, 9:44 am

Not sure. As a gut reaction I shudder at the thought of the responsibility and the idea of shoving people around is abhorrent to me....but there's no doubt that I was pretty dominant in a band I used to be in. Years later I would think back and feel guilty about not being a good egalitarian, and since then the only signs of leadership I've shown have been a few masterful suggestions that could probably be counted on the fingers of one hand. And I'd never push others around for the sake of an employer, that would really break my ethical code.

There have been a few times when people seem to have been waiting for me to guide them, particularly with music, and I've sometimes thought that I might be taking my egalitarian attitude a little too far there.........power can be very intoxicating, and once a person pops up to take on authority, they often seem to have trouble popping down again when their command role has expired. I probably have a lot of skills that others would want to ape, but my perfectionism always tells me that there's something seriously wrong if people want me to run anything with all the shortcomings in my skills. I hope that if I ever do become an authority figure for any purpose, I'll be able to pass the torch on.

I often balk at being led, though I've mellowed. I've noticed how the Aspie traits make it difficult for me to dance to the tunes of others, and I've had to accept that a lot of my anti-authority attitude is down to that special difficulty rather than it being particularly terrible to be led once in a while. I still feel that many authorities (and lay people) can't be trusted very well, but overall I'm more comfortable with accepting leadership from others. And at work, it helps ease my feelings of culpability - I can always play the "he told me to do it" card if anybody turns nasty about my work (not that I've had to, but I get paranoid if my back isn't covered). And I've noticed that I take leadership from people almost unconsciously - if I'm talking with somebody and I start talking way past the point or wringing out every scrap of useless information about a topic, very often it's the other person who has guided me out of it. In a way I'm content to be pushed around, though I don't tolerate anybody abusing it, unless it seems necessary to hold the job down. Whatever lay people tell me, I'm aware that I can do what I like, and that their authority over me is a gift I can take back whenever I want to.



UrchinStar47
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28 Apr 2010, 10:17 am

anbuend wrote:
People have been calling me a leader since long before I was aware they were calling me that. I never set out to be a leader. I only set out to do what I thought was right. And people apparently followed me for that. I would continue doing the exact same thing whether or not anyone followed me. To be honest having people trust me so much unnerves me. I am highly aware of my own limitations and am frequently afraid someone will see me do something incredibly stupid and think it's a good idea. I do think there is a big difference between me and people who consciously set out to be leaders. I wouldn't know how to do that if I tried. I know autistic people who do it consciously though so it's not an autistic vs nonautistic thing, it's just a difference in motivation. The idea that some people follow me is rather terrifying but if I stopped doing what I think is right because of that it would be no better than doing something wrong with the intent of being followed. So I continue doing my own thing and if people choose to follow or not follow it's none of my doing either way.

From what you write, you are the definition of a good leader. Looks like a page from the manual about being an alpha male.

I'm not. I lost the approach. :cry: However, I'm building a new one, so, I'll see how it goes.



Asp-Z
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28 Apr 2010, 11:11 am

I'm a leader of myself, and a follower of no one.



Taupey
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28 Apr 2010, 11:43 am

Asp-Z wrote:
I'm a leader of myself, and a follower of no one.


Nice :D



Taupey
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28 Apr 2010, 11:51 am

I have found myself in leadership roles too but not because I wanted to be there but because others insisted or because someone had to do it or all Hell would break loose. I am definitey not a follower. I'd much rather be independent and by myself doing my own thing.



Asp-Z
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28 Apr 2010, 11:52 am

Taupey wrote:
Asp-Z wrote:
I'm a leader of myself, and a follower of no one.


Nice :D


Thanks! :)



TheDoctor82
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28 Apr 2010, 1:42 pm

I guess I'm looked at as having leadership skills due to my professional demeanor the majority of the time; I've been told I'm really mature for my age, and of course owning my own business definitely helps.

I'm also the guy always planning ahead, so that adds to it, too.



Spazzergasm
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28 Apr 2010, 2:02 pm

I've been told I was good at leading hikes. Don't know if that counts, it was in 6th grade. :P
I can take control if I really like and know what we are doing.



Ichinin
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28 Apr 2010, 3:02 pm

Leading people around is not what it is cracked up to be, at least in the business world.

Outside that, I cannot care less if people thinks that i am a leader or not, i prefer to practice the "Gregory House" method for private social situations.


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alana
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28 Apr 2010, 5:52 pm

I've never been a leader and I've paid dearly for not following but I'm just not going to. If someone started following me, I would have to slap them. People need to think for themselves, having to have someone to follow is ridiculous. I think both are abnormal, the middle ground is what people should aim for. Authoritarianism sucks, that's whats going on when you follow someone. And a huge percentage of leaders are warped in some sociopathic way.



dustintorch
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28 Apr 2010, 9:19 pm

UrchinStar47 wrote:
anbuend wrote:
People have been calling me a leader since long before I was aware they were calling me that. I never set out to be a leader. I only set out to do what I thought was right. And people apparently followed me for that. I would continue doing the exact same thing whether or not anyone followed me. To be honest having people trust me so much unnerves me. I am highly aware of my own limitations and am frequently afraid someone will see me do something incredibly stupid and think it's a good idea. I do think there is a big difference between me and people who consciously set out to be leaders. I wouldn't know how to do that if I tried. I know autistic people who do it consciously though so it's not an autistic vs nonautistic thing, it's just a difference in motivation. The idea that some people follow me is rather terrifying but if I stopped doing what I think is right because of that it would be no better than doing something wrong with the intent of being followed. So I continue doing my own thing and if people choose to follow or not follow it's none of my doing either way.

From what you write, you are the definition of a good leader. Looks like a page from the manual about being an alpha male.

I'm not. I lost the approach. :cry: However, I'm building a new one, so, I'll see how it goes.


I agree. If Harry Potter taught me anything, it's that the best leaders are not the ones who go looking for it. They are the ones who have it thrust upon them.



TheDoctor82
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28 Apr 2010, 9:21 pm

alana wrote:
I've never been a leader and I've paid dearly for not following but I'm just not going to. If someone started following me, I would have to slap them. People need to think for themselves, having to have someone to follow is ridiculous. I think both are abnormal, the middle ground is what people should aim for. Authoritarianism sucks, that's whats going on when you follow someone. And a huge percentage of leaders are warped in some sociopathic way.


they won't; it's a popular trendy belief for people to tell each other to "think for yourself", but the majority of humanity really isn't known for doing it.

The majority of "leaders" are made so by the idiots who are willing to follow them; then you have to consider the source: who was the idiot who was willing to follow said nutjob to begin with?

At that point, you have the majority of people showing another "wonderful" trait of the majority of humanity: lack of accountability.

Humans like to do stupid things, and shirk off any responsibility in regards to their stupid thing.