Who has a good way to come down from an overload?

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electrifiedspam
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02 May 2010, 9:56 pm

I think I am calling it the right thing - overload. But it's like all the little stresses and discomforts pile up on one another until it becomes physical painful. It's can be like the whole world falling in on me, but I have not had one that bad for many years.

I find beer helps but I don't want to add alcoholism to my list of woes.

Beer helps many things. If I am by myself or if I can finally study a bit (my interest is programming) then I can come out of it and be a little more even keeled when dealing with the world.

The best way is avoidance but I have 5 kids..... avoiding noisy environments is a bit impossible from time to time.



blastoff
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02 May 2010, 10:45 pm

I would agree that beer is not the best solution. Personally I find that it works well. Very well. Too well. Vodka and rum work even better. But for me anyway it's a pretty self-destructive habit.

Ok, so with alcohol ruled out...

I dunno. Mostly I guess I'm here to discourage you from the 'drinking' solution. There's only so much you can do to get yourself back together with five kids around, especially if you need to be by yourself. Or maybe there's some way to use the kids to your advantage. Perhaps if you all had a good rope swing to take turns on, swinging and spinning and leaning over backward hanging on with one hand.... Probably it's a stupid idea, but it would help me, even if I had to share the swing. Often intense sensory experiences can help me recover from a shutdown more quickly than just hiding out until I feel better.

YMMV.



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02 May 2010, 10:50 pm

What works for me is going for a long walk and blasting my iPod or going for a nice, long drive somewhere.



pumibel
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02 May 2010, 10:56 pm

I find when overloaded I just need to be in a room by myself doing whatever I want to do: pursue special interests, watch TV, read, draw etc. It is probably hard to do with that many kids- the spouse may get resentful. Maybe after they are in bed or while they watch their favorite programs you can have a decompressing period.

I don't know if the beer is a problem since I don't know how many drinks you average a day. I like a little wine sometimes, but I don't drink it for a buzz. I think my usage averages to about a tablespoon a day if that much. If you are having a drink or less a day it may be OK to continue with that. when I was screened for depression they asked how often I have had 6 or more drinks in a sitting or the last time I did. (I have never, actually.) If you get a depression or alcoholism screening those are the types of questions they ask. It leads me to believe that a drink a day is not something to worry about. Maybe if alcoholism runs in the family it would be a concern. Sorry for the ramble!



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02 May 2010, 11:09 pm

I go into a dark quiet room by myself and either stim or do nothing. Generally if I'm that overloaded a non-sensory special interest just makes things worse. Sometimes I have to force myself to stay in one place while the painful overload stuff makes me miserable for a few hours because adding more stimulation just makes it take longer.


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02 May 2010, 11:28 pm

Whenever I am in an overload mode: Stop whatever I am doing that was causing it, and/or avoid the environment that is also causing it. That's the first step.

To end it, I will do these:

Sleep. That's the #1 remedy for me.
Watch some TV.
Play games on the laptop.
Go out for a walk, or sit outside, look at nature in real-time, taking them in.
Take a bath. I rarely do this, though.
AVOID PEOPLE AT ALL COSTS! They do NOT help me at all, even when hovering nearby, still within my sight or within the same room.
Turn off lights at night time, if I have any on, because I am photosensitive. A dark room relaxes me, even though I hate the dark sometimes.



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03 May 2010, 12:20 am

Much of what has been said wuill be repeatedly dittoed, not least by me, but I notice a crucial omission - 5 younguns, you say, but you do not indicate age range or availability of alternative caretaker[s].

I know for a fact - my father a great example - that 5 offspring ranging from toddler to middle school, then advancing till the older start leaving home need not preclude getting solitude / privacy / cool down and recharge time.. But if the cluster is 1 through say 7, and if you are sole caretaker or do not have a sympathettic ear, it would, yes, be hard.



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03 May 2010, 12:52 am

Go to a quiet room. Write down my thoughts. Get my mind off it (read, exercise, play video games).


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03 May 2010, 1:53 am

Another vote for the quiet room. Sometimes even my cats are too clingy for me to be around and the blinking light on the answering machine is too much pressure. :lol: A dark or at least naturally lit, cool, quiet room is the only way to go when I get like that.

Tell the kids that you love them but you need a half hour or an hour to yourself -- my daughter learned that one early -- then close the door, turn off the cell phone and do something you want to do or just take a nap or veg out for a while. It's good for you, and frankly, having a parent who's not stressed out and snapping their little heads off is good for them.



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03 May 2010, 3:01 am

I try and focus on one thing to block everything out. My boss showed me a great game, Armadillo Run. It's a weird physics based game, nearly a sand box but without the complete freedom.

It helps me to play it, just take a while and focus on anything but what threw me. You guys all sound like you like no stimulation, but for me at least, I find narrow stimulation along a well planned path to be more calming.


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03 May 2010, 3:27 am

My great grandpa had an idea. He lived in a small shack in the yard away from the main house with seven kids in it. He went there to be alone. He wasn't diagnosed but is definitely autistic.


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electrifiedspam
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03 May 2010, 5:54 am

The age range of my children is 10 years to 5months. I have a very supportive wife so there is help. It just took me so long to figure out what was wrong, and now I have to look for constructive solutions for it.

I have never thought about MORE stimulation before. I'll try going for a walk. I could use the exercise.

I have actually done that before (even though I didn't know that that was what I was doing). We were waiting for the girls (ages 7 and 5) dance recital but the waiting area was getting crowded, with few places to sit around a bunch of people that I didn't know. I took my son and walked around the building exploring. It was fun.

We hid in the mens room (they had a bench to sit on) for a while, but you can only hide for so long. I have a family gathering coming up..... My anxiety level 0 - 10 is about an 8. It will give me a chance to deal with being overloaded.

Thank you all.

P.S. Moving into a shack in the backyard has entered my mind several times...



Last edited by electrifiedspam on 03 May 2010, 9:12 pm, edited 1 time in total.

sarek
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03 May 2010, 6:31 am

I find that not doing anything at all is not the answer either.

But I want to be doing something that relaxes me and that ironically usually comes down to foruming and mailing.


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03 May 2010, 9:38 am

For me its taking a long walk. I sometimes zone out and just daydream. I sometimes do it when I am walking which is a little dangerous due to traffic.



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03 May 2010, 10:32 am

From age 18-34 I used mainly alcohol to soothe the overload. Things for me were exceptionally bad the last 4 of those years when my life seemed to spiral out of control while also having some physical difficulties to cope with.
I had to stop the self destruction so I stopped drinking completely and have done so now for 10 years. I have also stopped smoking after 30 years, I`m quite boring now. :)

I have found either having a bath [with ears underwater to cut out any noise] or a drive in my car to some quiet spot or watching some comedy on tv does me far more good. I also bought one of those vibrating plate exercise machines and stand on that if I get stressed.

I hope you get some relief from your situation but a hangover just makes it worse from my experiences.


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03 May 2010, 5:25 pm

I put loud music on, sit on the floor and rock.


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