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DonkeyBuster
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04 May 2010, 12:51 pm

Wild, huh? I'm sitting here feeling excluded from humanity, isolated and rejected, ruminating over the month's old loss of someone I thought was a friend but who turned out to just being nice and finally got fed up with me (sound familiar?), wishing I had community and friendship...

but the idea of being around people, having to interact with them, and sort through enough to maybe find some folks who like me just gives me the shudders. The sound of the human voice is really getting on my nerves these days.

Can you relate?

I mean, this is like the most social thing I've done in a couple of months.



Last edited by DonkeyBuster on 04 May 2010, 1:09 pm, edited 1 time in total.

CockneyRebel
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04 May 2010, 12:54 pm

There was a time, when I felt the same way. I've since than found a good group of friends.


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Dots
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04 May 2010, 1:15 pm

I feel lonely and peopled out often. It doesn't take very many people or very much time for me to start feeling overwhelmed and I just disconnect but then when I'm safe in my apartment I feel lonely. I sometimes feel lonely in the middle of a group of people, too. I think it's because it's hard for me to actually connect with a person.


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pschristmas
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04 May 2010, 3:02 pm

I'm sorry you're feeling bad.

I can relate to feeling peopled out -- I often am -- but I don't really get lonely very often. I don't often find myself missing anyone, either, and when I do it's usually more of a fleeting thought. This is how I usually end up losing friends -- they want more contact with me than I want with them.

I hope you feel better soon.



IdahoRose
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04 May 2010, 3:19 pm

I feel that way often. I can never decide if I'm happier being around people or being by myself. I guess I just like knowing that other people are there for me if I need them and having the option whether to interact with them or not.



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04 May 2010, 3:39 pm

I like people, but in limited quantity :D

I would prefer just to meet with a couple of people once per week and not have to socialize much beyond that. I interact with people at work, as part of my job, but at home on my own time - I prefer to spend time alone.

That's not to say that I don't want to connect with others. It's just that I don't want to gab on the phone, hang out for hours, etc.

One thing I found helpful was to enjoy an activity. For example, finding someone who likes to do a sport or hobby or activity of mutual interest. Meet up once every two weeks, have some fun doing the activity for an hour or so and agree to meet up again. Keeps me connected without being smothered.

Anyways, I hope you feel better soon.

:)



anxiety25
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04 May 2010, 3:55 pm

Feeling that way right now, too... it really SUCKS!

I went away to my mom's for the weekend, and had a great time... but now I just want to sit in the house and... regroup.

My more social activities that I usually get involved in... well, the ones online at least, I tried to mess with the other night and just got bored and overwhelmed with it. So even the things I do normally to zone out and regroup are bringing absolutely no satisfaction.

I know I'll come out of it, I always do... but I hate that period of waiting for it to happen.

I've found that as I get older, it happens more and more often, too.


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DonkeyBuster
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04 May 2010, 3:56 pm

Thanks everyone. It's just nice to know that others understand feeling repelled by people and yet lonely and depressed...



DonkeyBuster
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04 May 2010, 4:04 pm

anxiety25 wrote:
Feeling that way right now, too... it really SUCKS!

So even the things I do normally to zone out and regroup are bringing absolutely no satisfaction.

I know I'll come out of it, I always do... but I hate that period of waiting for it to happen.

I've found that as I get older, it happens more and more often, too.


Totally, totally. 8O

Major inertia, can't even get into reading, and absolutely I'll probably get fed up with something about the forums and quit... it's frustrating.

I mean, if I could get lost in one of my interests, then life would be GOOD.



anxiety25
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04 May 2010, 4:11 pm

DonkeyBuster wrote:
anxiety25 wrote:
Feeling that way right now, too... it really SUCKS!

So even the things I do normally to zone out and regroup are bringing absolutely no satisfaction.

I know I'll come out of it, I always do... but I hate that period of waiting for it to happen.

I've found that as I get older, it happens more and more often, too.


Totally, totally. 8O

Major inertia, can't even get into reading, and absolutely I'll probably get fed up with something about the forums and quit... it's frustrating.

I mean, if I could get lost in one of my interests, then life would be GOOD.


Yep.... it's just like right now, everything is just boring or overwhelming. I'm really irritable lately, and little things are bothering me. I tried to indulge in cleaning-sometimes a really really good cleaning spree can pull me out of it once I get going, but I just run out of motivation, lol. Ugh!


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DonkeyBuster
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04 May 2010, 4:26 pm

anxiety25 wrote:
Yep.... it's just like right now, everything is just boring or overwhelming. I'm really irritable lately, and little things are bothering me. I tried to indulge in cleaning-sometimes a really really good cleaning spree can pull me out of it once I get going, but I just run out of motivation, lol. Ugh!


Exactly! I tried to get going in the garden... it was all I could do to water, forget about anything else. If I didn't know how guilty I'd feel for negligence, I'd just let everything die.

I'm effing sitting around like a zombie... just staring off into space, missing my so-called friend...

Dinner? I have to think of something for dinner tonight? No, all I really have to do is have an opinion about which I want for dinner, and even that just seems pointless. :roll:



anxiety25
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04 May 2010, 4:47 pm

DonkeyBuster wrote:
anxiety25 wrote:
Yep.... it's just like right now, everything is just boring or overwhelming. I'm really irritable lately, and little things are bothering me. I tried to indulge in cleaning-sometimes a really really good cleaning spree can pull me out of it once I get going, but I just run out of motivation, lol. Ugh!


Exactly! I tried to get going in the garden... it was all I could do to water, forget about anything else. If I didn't know how guilty I'd feel for negligence, I'd just let everything die.

I'm effing sitting around like a zombie... just staring off into space, missing my so-called friend...

Dinner? I have to think of something for dinner tonight? No, all I really have to do is have an opinion about which I want for dinner, and even that just seems pointless. :roll:


We're gettin McDonald's... yeah, I know, not healthy at all, lol, but it works in times like this. The kiddos made that choice.


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DonkeyBuster
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04 May 2010, 4:58 pm

Enjoy your happy meal! :D

I've settled on the baked potato with chili. Phew, glad that's taken care of.

:o Wandering off now...



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04 May 2010, 5:28 pm

Oh WOW!! !!

I've been reading a set of articles where this was talked about at length as one of the hallmarks of Asperger's. It was so profound, and it perfectly described my own feelings throughout my life. The article was written by a woman named A.J. Mahari; she has Asperger's.

More recently, I am just peopled out. I try to socialize, and then I get to the point where I feel overwhelmed and I begin to sorta' ZONE OUT...then it's like CALGON TAKE ME AVAY!! !!

I would really like NOT to feel peopled out because I have some friends and acquaintances who are really into me, but of course, I am not good at making a real connection despite the desire. And then I'm right back to feeling overwhelmed again.

Then there are the situations where I'm actually GLAD not to have a connection, but people keep trying to force me to be social on their terms, and it makes me feel even WORSE.

It's frustrating, really.



Last edited by Surreal on 04 May 2010, 5:31 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Leander
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04 May 2010, 5:31 pm

Dots wrote:
I feel lonely and peopled out often. It doesn't take very many people or very much time for me to start feeling overwhelmed and I just disconnect but then when I'm safe in my apartment I feel lonely.

I feel lonely after hanging around my apartment too long as well, despite needing the solitude often. It's an annoyingly contradictory feeling to crave human contact at the same time as fearing it, and the fear always wins out.



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04 May 2010, 5:36 pm

I hate being on my own usually and want to hang out with someone. So I speak to someone new, meet their friends etc etc a new friendship on the horizon... Oh s**t I'm all peopled out now *walks off. Avoids group for a million years*

There are exceptions though, if I'm with really close friends I can't get enough of them. It's just acquaintances or friends of friends that make me peopled out, if I go out with a group larger than 4 including me (which rarely happens but when it does...) I have hardly anything to contribute and just shuffle along at the back and only talk to the person I know then as soon as I'm back home I'm like *and relaaaax*.


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