Page 2 of 3 [ 33 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3  Next


Rate your physical preference flexibility, 1 meaning you require an exact set of traits to like someone physically, and 10 meaning that you can become physically attracted to anyone, just by noting that they seem like they have a nice personality.
1 7%  7%  [ 6 ]
2 6%  6%  [ 5 ]
3 14%  14%  [ 12 ]
4 8%  8%  [ 7 ]
5 21%  21%  [ 18 ]
6 6%  6%  [ 5 ]
7 13%  13%  [ 11 ]
8 8%  8%  [ 7 ]
9 7%  7%  [ 6 ]
10 11%  11%  [ 10 ]
Total votes : 87

Hector
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 10 Mar 2008
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,493

22 May 2010, 3:41 pm

When I was in my early teens I rarely had a crush on more than one girl at a time, and it would just be this sort of arbitrary thing where I'd have a dream about them one day and then have trouble not looking at them. However, the older I get, the less picky I am when it comes to looks, perhaps out of maturity or self-awareness, or perhaps out of the desire to just have a girlfriend. At the moment I can divide women around my age into three groups distinguishing how much I'd want to go out with them, based on how eye-catching I find them: "yes", "no", or "maybe". It's pretty even between the three groups, so about a third go into each.



hale_bopp
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Nov 2004
Gender: Female
Posts: 17,054
Location: None

22 May 2010, 5:09 pm

If im attracted to someone its not their looks. I'm only 10 -20 % attracted by physical appearance.

I will like their look because I like them generally.



Mosaicofminds
Deinonychus
Deinonychus

User avatar

Joined: 17 Mar 2010
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 319
Location: USA

22 May 2010, 5:41 pm

I don't believe it's always easy to separate physical attraction from attraction to someone's personality. After all, we communicate our personalities through our body language and facial expressions, and often the way we dress and groom ourselves says something about how we see ourselves, too. (Even if all it says is, "I don't care how I look," that in and of itself speaks volumes).

That said, I've thought random strangers on the street or acquaintances I didn't particularly like were physically attractive. I was also once in a relationship with someone who I did not find particularly physically attractive. But as I felt more and more affectionate towards him, he seemed more and more attractive to me. (There was an earlier thread where I said I thought attraction was necessary for getting out of the "friends zone;" this is the experience that led me to that conclusion).

So, personality has led me to find people more physically attractive. But physical attractiveness has also led me to be overly optimistic about people's personalities. There have been people who I felt magnetically pulled to be friends with. I only found out later, and after they ignored all my overtures, that they weren't as nice as I thought they were. In retrospect, I believed the way they physically presented themselves and overlooked the evidence that they were selfish people. So these things interact. But in the end, personality is more important to me.

I would rate myself a 7.



amazon_television
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Feb 2009
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,605
Location: I woke up on 7th street

22 May 2010, 5:43 pm

As others have said, there's a major interplay between someone's personality and how I perceive their looks. I need to have at least a degree of initial physical attraction, but when I find that someone has an awesome personality as well, their "attractiveness" tends to skyrocket.

That said, looks are definitely important to me, and I think what I consider attractive looks-wise is fairly conventional as dudes go (fit girls with nice boobs and all that), maybe I lean a little more "natural" than average but not by much. I've said it before, my standards are pretty outlandish in terms of looks and personality both. On the survey I put a "3".


_________________
I know I made them a promise but those are just words, and words can get weird.
I think they made themselves perfectly clear.


astaut
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Sep 2009
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,777
Location: Southeast US

22 May 2010, 6:50 pm

I put an 8. It's hard for me to put a number on things, but I've learned I'm not terribly concerned with looks. There's some guys that I've been attracted to at first sight, but I can lose that attraction quickly as I learn more about their personality. And the guys that I'm quickly attracted to but don't personally know, I instantly become unattracted to them if they make a slight appearance change, like a haircut. Most of my relationships began with me not being physically attracted to the guy...as I got became attracted to his mental side the physical came along as well. I don't know that I could be with someone I found unattractive, but often the attraction comes in time for me.



Quartz11
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Mar 2010
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,237
Location: New England

22 May 2010, 9:03 pm

I picked 5.

I can be pretty shallow at first. Just like a girl for the sake I think she's physically attractive.

But well, being good looking can really only take someone so far. Whereas I can be friends with a less than attractive girl, over time realize she's a great person, and overlook the physical flaws.



kwilky
Raven
Raven

User avatar

Joined: 23 Apr 2010
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 113

22 May 2010, 9:12 pm

ToadOfSteel wrote:
I'm not all that affected by physical traits either. Well, okay, if I'm looking at a picture and i have no personality traits to go on, I'll default to physical appearances, but I won't be attracted to a woman that way because I don't know her. Overall, however, the one thing that instantly attracts me is some sign that the woman is attracted back.


Same here. If someone is kind to me and shows interest then that will heavily outweigh any physical traits. I do have some standards though. If the girl looks like my sister then that's probably a deal breaker.



roadGames
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 18 Oct 2007
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 401

25 May 2010, 11:31 am

For one night stands, as long as her personality isn't insane, I'm down. For relationships, I'm gonna now be doing some in-depth probing before I get into anything serious with a girl. If she can nerd talk with me, can be affectionate, and is slender, I'm in love. Next nerdy cute girl I see in a class, I'm gonna chat her up no hesitation. Nothing to lose.



AngelRho
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Jan 2008
Age: 45
Gender: Male
Posts: 9,366
Location: The Landmass between N.O. and Mobile

25 May 2010, 12:15 pm

My opinion is that someone who is physically attractive is generally the type of person who takes care of herself and feels good about herself. That contributes a lot to her personality. The kind of woman I want to be with is a healthy balance of both.

I used to have a more relaxed attitude, but after I got through my first college degree, I took a temporary job working for a lawyer. A lot of his clients, and I'm sorry to say this, were a bunch of lazy, deadbeat losers. Some would come in, and I mean like 400-pound women with 8 or 10 children in tow. I'm not talking about just one or two women like this, but like 1 out of every 3 that came in--and that's a lot! I'm talking NASTY, stunk to high heaven, and were especially nasty in their attitudes. I came to notice a pattern, and I couldn't help but see similar patterns among other women I saw outside the office. I thought about a past relationship I'd been in for a long time, and all of a sudden it made sense why this girl had been mean to me for so long. It had less to do with me and more to do with her overall view of the world. I suspect that might have been shaped by her own self-image and insecurity.

I'm not saying that applies to everyone or even anyone here, but the "nicer looking" girls, even the ones who clearly weren't interested in me, were at least nice about it. I'm with someone who was very skinny when I met her. Sure, she has plenty psychoses of her own clearly not caused by being overweight. But I wonder sometimes if that has anything to do with our compatibility.



sylvr
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 10 Sep 2009
Age: 35
Gender: Female
Posts: 424
Location: Toronto, Canada

25 May 2010, 12:30 pm

I put a 3.

I've never really been able to say/think "Wow, that guy's hot!" Aesthetically pleasing perhaps, yes, but it wouldn't determine how attractive I found them. For me it's all in the personality.

Come to think of it, my boyfriend's probably not what most would consider attractive... :lol: But honestly he's not that bad. I also knew him online first for years. Personality first!


_________________
You look sensational in that dress!
~~~~~~~~~~
Aspie Quiz Result: Your Aspie score: 154 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 62 of 200
You are very likely an Aspie


Freak_Contagion
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 16 May 2010
Age: 32
Gender: Male
Posts: 418
Location: Texas

25 May 2010, 7:08 pm

sylvr wrote:
I put a 3.

I've never really been able to say/think "Wow, that guy's hot!" Aesthetically pleasing perhaps, yes, but it wouldn't determine how attractive I found them. For me it's all in the personality.

Come to think of it, my boyfriend's probably not what most would consider attractive... :lol: But honestly he's not that bad. I also knew him online first for years. Personality first!

I know I set the rankings opposite to what is intuitive to many, but did you perhaps mean 7/8? >.> Perhaps reread the question?

Has anyone else mistaken it this way, and figured 1 meant you didn't care about appearance, and 10 meant you have exacting physical standards? =/


_________________
Semi-colons are awesome; you are awesome if you use them.

I enjoy random PMs. ^.^


NathansMommy
Raven
Raven

User avatar

Joined: 30 Aug 2009
Gender: Female
Posts: 117
Location: Northeast Oklahoma, USA

26 May 2010, 2:55 pm

To be completely honest, physical attraction is what usually draws one person to another. You can't look at someone you know nothing about and say "I bet he/she is super funny and caring. I bet he/she has an awesome personality and we'll be compatable". However, it is VERY possible to look at someone and say "Oh my! He/She is so hot!" The thing is, physical attraction and a genuine connection are two completely different thing. It is perfectly fine to want to get to know someone based off physical attraction, but if that is the only criteria important to you, there is definitely a problem. Honest to goodness, I don't care how good looking a guy is, if he has a personality I don't like, the attraction is completely lost. I'm serious. Having a true connection with another person is way more important and rewarding.

An example from my personal life: I tend to be attracted to guys that are "rough around the edges". Tattoos, piercing, shaggy hair, maybe a little "strange" looking with their style. I'm attracted to "odd" type people, I guess you could say. One of my friends used to say I only dated guys that look like they were just released from prison! I'm not one for the huge muscles, GQ model looking guys; thery're just not my style. However, my current boyfriend doesn't not meet my usual criteria, if you will. He is clean cut; an average looking guy. He's not someone I would have looked at and my first thought be about how amazingly hot he is. But when he first talked to me, he made me laugh like crazy. He was so funny and sarcastic, even rude at times (which I kind of liked because he wasn't acting like other guys: trying to say all the right things and throwing complements at me). He is one of the most intelligent and driven people I have ever met, far more intelligent than any boyfriend I have ever had. After talking to him a few times, I was definitely interested. We have now been together over two and a half years. This is the best realationship I have ever been in and we are super happy together. I can also honestly say that I am very physically attracted to him now. I think he is so good looking. And to think, I may have overlooked him because he wasn't my "type". I'm glad he made the first move.

I know it may sound cliche or bogus, but the whole Inner Beauty thing is real. I wouldn't suggest ruling someone out just because they don't meet all your requirements. You may miss out on your perfect match!



Halqer
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

User avatar

Joined: 22 May 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 2

27 May 2010, 8:03 pm

I think that the physical features that a person has are often complimentary to their personality. I think that most people are inherently fascinating to look at (hence my fanatic love of portraiture and other art of people). I've spent hours thinking about complete strangers, trying to capture their likeness on paper: an old African woman I saw sitting in the airport in Chicago, or a tall Asian man with acne working behind the counter at Safeway. I notice people more than most of the kids in my age group, I think, even if I'm not very good at relating to others.

Still, there's a line between thinking someone looks interesting and thinking, "I'd sure like to make out with you". In that respect, I guess, I have a definite preference for girls who are my age or a few years older. I think that the more confident a girl or woman is, the sexier she appears, and I like athletic (or strong) females. I'm attracted to girls who possess the fashion sense I definitely lack. I don't much care for extensive makeup on women, though, as it makes them look a bit fake (on the other hand, makeup makes women more interesting from an artistic point of view).



Bataar
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 18 Sep 2008
Age: 45
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,846
Location: Post Falls, ID

27 May 2010, 8:11 pm

I couldn't date someone I'm not physically attractive to. I don't have a set list or anything, it's just an instinct. I've seen "big" girls I thought were attractive and H/W proportionate girls with a killer body but was turned off by their face or something. For me, there's not a lot of middle ground when it comes to thinking of a woman in the perspective of a relationship. I'm either attracted or repulsed. I could be talking to a woman and have no thought of a relationship and things will be just fine but if someone tells me she "likes" me and I don't find her attractive, my mindset changes and my escape mechanism kicks in.



Seanmw
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 25 Jul 2009
Age: 33
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,639
Location: Bremerton, WA

27 May 2010, 10:32 pm

Leander wrote:
For me the distinction between physical attraction and personality attraction isn't clear cut enough for me to assign a number to it. When you look at someone you're not just seeing their physical shape, but catching a snapshot of their personality from the way they carry themselves, their expressions, their smile, their body language, their choice of clothes, etc. I'd still file those things under "physical attraction" because they're visual, but the source of those traits is personality. In terms of the attractiveness of a potential partner, these extras can make a person with an average static physical appearance much more appealing to me than someone with good looks alone.
agreed


_________________
+Blog: http://itsdeeperthanyouknow.blogspot.com/
+"Beneath all chaos lies perfect order"


ursaminor
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Nov 2009
Age: 158
Gender: Male
Posts: 936
Location: Leiden, Netherlands

29 May 2010, 6:36 am

Definitely 1.
I care about 20% for personality.
Looks is what causes the initial attraction and personality is what keeps me there.
Someone with a boring personality won't keep me there with their looks, I'd probably take advantage of them and move on.