Would you consider this person (myself)...normal looking?

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right-hand-child
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22 May 2010, 6:04 pm

-EDIT-
woah i didnt expect so many people to reply XD. yeah thanks for your help people, that helped. although someone said i'll go carzy trying to please everyone, and thats become self apparant with all the mixed opinions im getting. but thanks people, that really helped.
also the only reason i havent shaved *yet* is because shaving earlier means you have to shave more later.

yeah i need your oppinions for a sec. recently ive been feeling VEERRRY self concious; people keep moving away from me at school, although i know its most likely not because of how i look (more to do with how i act). not like i could care less. but anyways i want to know if i look slightly...different or outstanding to a normal person in anyway. i understand that AS does not have anything to do with appearence, but i cant shake this feeling of self conciousness of until i know.

I understand that there is MUCH more to dating than appearence, but i just need to get this "i must look like a total spastic" image out of my head. sorry if this request seems like im being insensitive or shallow in any way. i know this isnt a dating site or anything but please help me out here a sec. I'm sixteen years old by the way

heres my pic (on one of my average days, not at my best or worst):
Image



Last edited by right-hand-child on 23 May 2010, 5:29 am, edited 1 time in total.

Moog
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22 May 2010, 6:10 pm

Hello. I'll be honest. I think you do have a slightly unusual appearance, though nothing super disabling - unless you let it be. Perhaps a different haircut would help?


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rmgh
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22 May 2010, 6:18 pm

That's exactly what I was going to say. I think you'd probably suit a different hair style better. You look fine to me.



right-hand-child
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22 May 2010, 6:23 pm

rmgh wrote:
That's exactly what I was going to say. I think you'd probably suit a different hair style better. You look fine to me.

yeah i kinda thought that, thats a ponytail at the back of my head by the way. i usualy let it all down but maybe i should have got a different picture, like me with my hair down as an example...i'll do that in the morning.

anyways thanks man, just wanted to confirm that you cant "spot" as people out from a crowd by appearence



rmgh
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22 May 2010, 6:28 pm

right-hand-child wrote:
rmgh wrote:
That's exactly what I was going to say. I think you'd probably suit a different hair style better. You look fine to me.

yeah i kinda thought that, thats a ponytail at the back of my head by the way. i usualy let it all down but maybe i should have got a different picture, like me with my hair down as an example...i'll do that in the morning.

anyways thanks man, just wanted to confirm that you cant "spot" as people out from a crowd by appearence

Definitely not! That's why it's known as a hidden disability :)



SlappedWithIt
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22 May 2010, 6:33 pm

lol if you cut your hair down to like 4 you would look like my "frind" from germany.



Pandoran-March
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22 May 2010, 6:50 pm

You look fine, although getting rid of the ponytail might be a good idea. It's not a very common thing to see on guys, and it can only make an awkward personality that much harder to deal with.

Have you considered reading some books on sociology or psychology? Those two subjects, just reading the intro books can help more than most other things combined. (At least, it did for me.) It all depends on how you process information. *shrug*


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astaut
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22 May 2010, 6:55 pm

I certainly don't think you look weird or anything. Do you have a mustache? If you do, I think you would look better without it, but I understand some guys become very attached to their facial hair :] Personally, I don't like ponytail-length hair on guys, but lots of girls do. And I have dated a guy with hair longer than me, so I'm not one to talk really...



Mosaicofminds
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22 May 2010, 6:59 pm

Hmm...I would consider cutting your bangs a little shorter so they don't cover your eyes. In general, a different haircut might fit the shape of your face better, but I'm not sure what kind would work best. Still, you look pretty normal to me.



Hector
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22 May 2010, 7:06 pm

I get that you don't want your photo to make you look better than you actually do, though in this case I think it's the opposite. The ideal (for clarity, not necessarily for flattery purposes) is to have a photo taken outside in the daylight, with you smiling (a real, not fake, smile) and looking face-on at the camera. As it is, the photo isn't that clear, and you look less healthy than you otherwise would.

Also, get rid of the mustache. It's too thin to help the cause, and they're not really in vogue anyway. I agree that your hair is kind of long at the front, but that's a matter on which girls may be more divided. If you're that self-conscious then I'd say that, at least for now, short (not necessarily buzzcut-length, but short) hair on men appeals to a wider range of people.

EDIT: I had long hair for most of the past seven years and while it had some fans, it may have set me back more than it helped. Ponytails, though possibly helping to make your hair look less messy/dirty on a not-so-great day, are even more unusual.



Last edited by Hector on 22 May 2010, 7:14 pm, edited 2 times in total.

rmgh
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22 May 2010, 7:13 pm

Hector wrote:
I get that you don't want your photo to make you look better than you actually do, though in this case I think it's the opposite. The ideal (for clarity, not necessarily for flattery purposes) is to have a photo taken outside in the daylight, with you smiling (a real, not fake, smile) and looking face-on at the camera. As it is, the photo isn't that clear, and you look less healthy than you otherwise would.

Also, get rid of the mustache. It's too thin to help the cause, and they're not really in vogue anyway. I agree that your hair is kind of long at the front, but that's a matter on which girls may be more divided. If you're that self-conscious then I'd say that, at least for now, short (not necessarily buzzcut-length, but short) hair on men appeals to a wider range of people.

Some top notch advice, here. :D

I used to have long hair. I wanted the "emo" look hair, but I was terrible at achieving it. I would love to know what I would suit so I can be happy with my appearance. I just wear my hair short because I don't know what else to do with it.



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22 May 2010, 8:24 pm

I think you look fine.

There are a lot of guys here in my home-town with the hair in their face style like you have , no pony-tail though.

May be a silly question but, do you shower every day?
And do you put clean clothes on every day? I've always been able to smell if someone has worn their shirt twice or not showered. And hair washing is important too, at least every second day.
I don't mean to offend you. :)



happymusic
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22 May 2010, 9:10 pm

You have very nice features. A short haircut would look very good on you because of your bone structure and eyes. I think you'd look very nice clean shaven.



Sparrowrose
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22 May 2010, 9:12 pm

I think you look just fine and very cute in a sort of "mopey boy" way. (You look very sad, although I know that a lot of us on the spectrum look sad or angry when our face is really just relaxed and inside we might be very happy and contented. I apparently have an angry face when mine is relaxed.)

But if I saw you, I would probably stereotype you badly because you look like the heavy metal stoners I used to see all the time in the 1970s. I think it's mainly the hairstyle and facial hair plus it looks like you're wearing a military jacket. It's a retro "bad boy" look and I like it but some people don't because of the social messages it sends.

Though as far as attracting a girl, that look shouldn't count against you because there are a lot of girls who really go for that heavy metal stoner look. The question is: are they the sort of girl you're interested in? If so, then keep your looks (because you're comfortable with them!) and accept that not everyone will like them (and you'll go crazy if you try to please *everyone* anyway.) If heavy metal stoner girls are not what you'd like to attract, consider changing your looks so as to attract a wider spectrum of types of girls.


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22 May 2010, 9:17 pm

look like a guy I went to school with, he also studied IT like I did, but was a year under me.


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Alethes
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22 May 2010, 9:19 pm

u look like me. no. not /even/ a little bit
-- exactley like me.

srsly r u like my evil twin or something ?
(sorry jus teasing.)

well, okay . . . srsly, to me, u look liek
someone borne out of the wrong age.