Funny article on getting girls

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sacrip
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23 May 2010, 2:25 pm

It may come across as mean spirited to some, but this is probably the best realistic advice you'll find on what you're doing wrong, if anything.

Cracked


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Lene
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23 May 2010, 2:42 pm

Beat ya to it :P

http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt122898.html

Good taste in articles though :wink:



sacrip
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23 May 2010, 2:53 pm

Dang it! Well, it's probably worth a repost anyways.


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Hector
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23 May 2010, 3:17 pm

"Be more attractive", "do something until you become a cool, handsome guy", "just be yourself, only cooler", not exactly straightforward advice. Putting oneself in another person's shoes is actually extremely difficult - for instance, more often than not, I'm not sure what women see in men in general, and sometimes I wonder if it would help if I happened to be a bit gay. And I know at least some signs of interest and revulsion, but they're still just signs, there's a lot of ambiguity. I'd say that the majority of the time I've had very specific notions of what particular people felt about me, I've been wrong to at least a certain extent. I can't really speak for everyone else here, maybe it's just easier for the rest of us.

All in all, this is a very complicated topic misleadingly made out to be simple. Most "advice" I've seen on the internet on this matter, including this article, is either a terse oversimplification or otherwise questionable.



sacrip
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23 May 2010, 4:22 pm

Certainly, this 'advice' won't apply to everyone and their specific life situations. I suppose it resonates with me because this is just the type of advice nobody was willing, or able, to give me when I could have really used it about 10-15 years ago.

1) You like beautiful girls. Girls like handsome men. That's just how it is.

2) Girls are not from Venus, they're human, just like you. Treat them that way.

3) Don't 'Be Yourself' if being yourself doesn't work. Be better. Take more showers. Talk less about Piers Anthony novels. It's not compromising yourself, it's meeting them halfway. Do you have ANY idea how long it took them to pick that outfit?

Of course, "Wait until you're 25 and not a self-loathing dork seeking a girlfriend as a form of validation," would have worked too. But that's just mean.


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nick007
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23 May 2010, 7:11 pm

The mpost logical sounding advice I heard about finding someone was from a self-help book by singing comedian Steve Goodie called "Achieving Happiness Through Lower Standards"
http://stevegoodie.com/ahtls2/index.html


Here’s another universal topic. Let's start off with a mantra:

Relationship Mantra #1: “Today I will settle for whoever comes along.” (Say this 1,250 times every morning.) Love is a biggie for a lot of us. Love is confusing and evasive. Love comes when you least expect it, and love leaves with your TV and a sneer. “‘Till death do us part” is frightening because we’re terribly afraid that the really right one will come wandering down the beach on the first day of the honeymoon, and we’ll be hitched to this big loser. The trick is to accept the loser you’re stuck with. Love how inadequate s/he is; embrace his/her disgusting habits; don’t look around, just dig into the sand with your true love and consider getting cable. If you compare what you have with what you don’t have, of course you’re going to be unhappy.

There are only so many leggy supermodels to go around, and there are billions of poor short fat bald slobs who want to own them. And there is a distressingly low number of handsome successful non-violent guys with jobs, and billions of angry venomous women who want to mold them into love-slaves. We can’t all be Billy Joel. We can’t all get dumped by Christie, even though we love her just the way she is. By the way, he wrote that song for his previous wife, not Christie. I bet his first wife wakes up laughing every day now. So - what’s the point? Find someone who doesn’t totally nauseate you and give up the search!



I haven't read the whole book; only what was online but it makes sense to me & I think more people should practice that


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hale_bopp
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23 May 2010, 7:53 pm

sacrip wrote:
Certainly, this 'advice' won't apply to everyone and their specific life situations. I suppose it resonates with me because this is just the type of advice nobody was willing, or able, to give me when I could have really used it about 10-15 years ago.

1) You like beautiful girls. Girls like handsome men. That's just how it is.

2) Girls are not from Venus, they're human, just like you. Treat them that way.

3) Don't 'Be Yourself' if being yourself doesn't work. Be better. Take more showers. Talk less about Piers Anthony novels. It's not compromising yourself, it's meeting them halfway. Do you have ANY idea how long it took them to pick that outfit?

Of course, "Wait until you're 25 and not a self-loathing dork seeking a girlfriend as a form of validation," would have worked too. But that's just mean.


OH HEAR HEAR!

Brilliant advice, some i never even thought of.

W spend hours looking pretty, and go through a lot of pain to be hairless. Men should make an effort themselves, instead of making no effort and expect people to like them when they smell, wear ugly clothes and make no effort whatsoever.



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23 May 2010, 10:27 pm

hale_bopp wrote:
sacrip wrote:
Certainly, this 'advice' won't apply to everyone and their specific life situations. I suppose it resonates with me because this is just the type of advice nobody was willing, or able, to give me when I could have really used it about 10-15 years ago.

1) You like beautiful girls. Girls like handsome men. That's just how it is.

2) Girls are not from Venus, they're human, just like you. Treat them that way.

3) Don't 'Be Yourself' if being yourself doesn't work. Be better. Take more showers. Talk less about Piers Anthony novels. It's not compromising yourself, it's meeting them halfway. Do you have ANY idea how long it took them to pick that outfit?

Of course, "Wait until you're 25 and not a self-loathing dork seeking a girlfriend as a form of validation," would have worked too. But that's just mean.


OH HEAR HEAR!

Brilliant advice, some i never even thought of.

W spend hours looking pretty, and go through a lot of pain to be hairless. Men should make an effort themselves, instead of making no effort and expect people to like them when they smell, wear ugly clothes and make no effort whatsoever.


That begs the question: why do women go through all that effort? If there's a guy that only goes after women that do so because (in the eyes of the guy) they look "prettier" than the woman that doesn't, then he doesn't have the right to complain when women call him out on those things you mention.

But honestly, I see something really attractive in the more plain-looking women that don't get into such a huge bind about picking a certain outfit or doing their hair beyond brushing/straightening it. The one and only time i was instantly attracted to a woman based on appearance alone was when she was wearing a simple t-shirt, jeans, and a baseball cap with a batman logo on it. In other words, someone I could relate to. (unfortunately she was taken, but alas...)

Hygiene is a must, of course; I take care of myself when it comes to those things, and would expect a woman to as well. But the whole thing about agonizing over an outfit just doesn't make any sense to me.



astaut
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24 May 2010, 12:00 am

nick007 wrote:
The mpost logical sounding advice I heard about finding someone was from a self-help book by singing comedian Steve Goodie called "Achieving Happiness Through Lower Standards"
http://stevegoodie.com/ahtls2/index.html


I'm not sure that article is being serious :? Maybe it's just me totally missing it, but I read it as something to be funny and not serious advice. If it is serious, I don't think it's good advice. I think broadening your horizons as to what you're looking for in a partner or being flexible with things you want in a partner is great, but I don't think it's a good thing to necessarily lower your standards. When you date someone who has low standards or no real expectations of you, it just kind of...sucks. I've been in this position before. It led me to feel very self-conscious and leery of my partner, and that is not the kind of person I am. It hard to explain without going into detail.



nick007
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24 May 2010, 1:27 am

astaut wrote:
nick007 wrote:
The mpost logical sounding advice I heard about finding someone was from a self-help book by singing comedian Steve Goodie called "Achieving Happiness Through Lower Standards"
http://stevegoodie.com/ahtls2/index.html


I'm not sure that article is being serious :? Maybe it's just me totally missing it, but I read it as something to be funny and not serious advice. If it is serious, I don't think it's good advice. I think broadening your horizons as to what you're looking for in a partner or being flexible with things you want in a partner is great, but I don't think it's a good thing to necessarily lower your standards. When you date someone who has low standards or no real expectations of you, it just kind of...sucks. I've been in this position before. It led me to feel very self-conscious and leery of my partner, and that is not the kind of person I am. It hard to explain without going into detail.


It may be meant to be funny but I completely agree with that advice. I truly believe that men & women should learn to be happy with someone instead of trying to find the perfect partner because there is NO such thing as that. It toally sux knowing that I will spend the rest of my life alone because NO women will give me a chance because there standards are to high. I am NOT trying to date a beauty queen either; I just want someone who doesn't have a coke problem but my standard is to high


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machf
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24 May 2010, 4:00 pm

ToadOfSteel wrote:
hale_bopp wrote:
OH HEAR HEAR!

Brilliant advice, some i never even thought of.

W spend hours looking pretty, and go through a lot of pain to be hairless. Men should make an effort themselves, instead of making no effort and expect people to like them when they smell, wear ugly clothes and make no effort whatsoever.


That begs the question: why do women go through all that effort? If there's a guy that only goes after women that do so because (in the eyes of the guy) they look "prettier" than the woman that doesn't, then he doesn't have the right to complain when women call him out on those things you mention.

But honestly, I see something really attractive in the more plain-looking women that don't get into such a huge bind about picking a certain outfit or doing their hair beyond brushing/straightening it. The one and only time i was instantly attracted to a woman based on appearance alone was when she was wearing a simple t-shirt, jeans, and a baseball cap with a batman logo on it. In other words, someone I could relate to. (unfortunately she was taken, but alas...)

Hygiene is a must, of course; I take care of myself when it comes to those things, and would expect a woman to as well. But the whole thing about agonizing over an outfit just doesn't make any sense to me.

I mostly agree... I stay clean, shaven, showered... I don't get designer clothes but ones that fit me (no, I'm not fat or anything... I mean clothes that don't make me look as if I was wearing a potato bag), and while I don't like wearing ties and three-piece suits except on very special occasions, I don't wear rags, either - mostly casual sportswear (a shirt, jeans, boots... a jacket in cold weather... my glasses when I have to look at something in the distance...). I do, however, appreciate a woman who likes to make herself look pretty - not one that wears a ton of makeup and what not, but one that just applies the proper touch here and there to emphasize her natural looks a bit, who dresses as a woman and not as a slut or a teenage girl, whose hair isn't a bird's nest but doesn't spend $500 on a hairdo either... a woman that knows how to be a woman, for every occasion, I guess... (or the mental idea I have of one)



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24 May 2010, 7:57 pm

ToadOfSteel wrote:
That begs the question: why do women go through all that effort? If there's a guy that only goes after women that do so because (in the eyes of the guy) they look "prettier" than the woman that doesn't, then he doesn't have the right to complain when women call him out on those things you mention.


Often to make things stand out for a potential partner it's best to look and behave your best. Its gets people to notice more initially, but that doesn't make them shallow. After they get to know you a decent guy will find a non groomed you perfectly acceptable.

To expect someone to like someone at their worst off the bat is asking for a miracle - and unreasonable to call them "shallow"

Are you "shallow" for initially liking a non dented car better than a dented one, but then you grow to like the dented one better because it runs more smoothly? No.

Men (not you, but i've seen others here) who expect women to like them exactly the way they are - I see a man who makes no effort to be attractive to you, or thinks highly of you enough to WANT to be attractive for you, and expect some perfect woman to fall onto their lap - as not living in the real world.

No-one is perfect, so it's a bout meeting half way.



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