I'm tired of being called lazy!

Post Reply New Topic

I know what both of you mean. It is true employers expect you to look busy at all times. I believe I have an explanation. There are given moments in which there is nothing to do for an employee(s). From the customer's point of view it looks like the employee(s) is loafing around, being lazy, goofing off, and/or doing nothing. The thing is some people in the world think of multiple possiblities in given situations such as this like coming to the conclusion that there may be nothing to do for the employee or they could be loafing around and goofing off. Employers are trying to cover their tracks for those who do not think in multiple possiblities. Employers want people's business and as many people as possible so as to increase their profit margins. If an employer loses a customer it is hard to get them back and to get others. If a business makes a customer angry the customer will not only not come back but the customer will mouth off to other people.

I believe and I could be wrong but a lot of people go by initial appearance and their initial impressions. I do not think alot of people probe further than that. In addition, some people do not use their words carefully and think through what they say. Some people are prone to exaggerations.

Finally, I bet aspies are having the most problems in the United States of America. I've done research and I've asked questions outside of any autism board. In America, the people here go by a certain set of values. http://www.claremontmckenna.edu/pages/f ... alues.html

One of these values is an internal locust of control, personal responsbility, and control over the enviroment. By what I have read in American society if something bad happens to you it is your fault. You are not to blame any external factor like another person, traffic delay, etc. Honestly, I believe it is a matter of point of view of what is to blame and what is not. I believe alot of people in America take the point of view of having the internal locust of control. Even if it is truly an external entity's fault that something happened to you I believe that by the values of the United States of America it is still your problem, your obstacle, your trial, and your tribulation to over come. I believe we have to quit talking in the language of blame and external locust of control and learn and talk in the language of personal responsibility and internal locust of control.

I believe the first step is to always use "I" statements and never use "you" statements or "global" statements. For example, I said previously "In addition, some people do not use their words carefully and think through what they say." Instead of saying this, I believe it is better to say "I am too precise in the things I say and I have a tendency to be a perfectionist in the things that I do." Finally, I would say "I have a tendency to be very literal minded." I believe we would earn more respect from other people if we at least did this. This is called taking ownership of the problem.

when i get called lazy, it makes me seriously tired as well.
it makes me so tired that i have to go and lie down and sleep because i find the concept of me being called "lazy" to be overwhelmingly arduous to process.

i could not be bothered to devote any of my brain power to the question of "am i lazy", because it is just too hard at the moment.

i am too lazy to bother to think about whether i am lazy.

Talk about somthing that irks me! I had a boss that said this sooooo often.

"If you have time to lean (in my case bounce lol ) you have time to clean."

First of all, bossman, why do YOU get to dictate the time frame in which I lean. I have already cleaned, prepped, organized everything in this place, I'm in the back of the house so there are no customers to see me and I don't have any tables. Quite frankly, you're the one locked up in the office and unavailable to designate us to go on an actual break so I'm taking a moment to gather myself since I have a moment. By the way, you're inventory behind the bar is significantly off. I measure the bottles out of habit everytime I work. We're also out of chives. ANything else?

At this point he would just stare at me and walk away.

A great analysis of the competitive individualist culture. I have a problem with taking ownership of a problem that one didn't cause themselves though as "ownership" could also be considered as taking blame. I think taking blame for something that isn't ones fault is ultimately detrimental to ones sense of self-worth and can hamper ones chances of ever finding personal happiness. I think that the truth will ultimately set you free and it is far more useful to take an accurate reading of the causes of a problem (including environmental factors). And if the rest of society doesn't see it that way? At least you still have self-worth and a sense of humour!

Thanks for your praise. I understand what you are saying about your problem with taking ownership of a problem. I agree with you in that I believe we should be able to place blame where it is due. Like you said, the rest of society does not see it that way. In addition, by what I have read if I blame someone their defenses go up. Honestly, I believe we have to deal in practicality here. It does not matter what logic or reasoning we use to blame an external actor. It does not work and I believe the definition of insanity said by Albert Einstein is "doing something over and over again and expecting different results." I believe this is one of the first and is a major step towards obtaining our answers we need so we can all live and happy successful life. If we all want to attempt to change society or any thing about it then I believe we need to be in a position to do that. Right now, I do not think most of us are in a position to do that.

Look at the history of Japan. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Japan

Before Japan could challenge the US Japan had to build up its power and might to do so. Before we can challenge anyone or anything we need to

1. make sure we're correct about the things we believe and say
2. we need to get ourselves into a position of power and strength. (This may take a long time)

Part of acheiving number two is we need people to be willing to give us knowledge. We can't demand anything of anyone.