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JVDifferent
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

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Joined: 13 Nov 2009
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 41

11 Aug 2010, 12:55 am

So there's this guy friend I have. I used to have a bit of a crush on him, but it's largely gone away now (he didn't feel the same way :( ). We're pretty sweet friends though so it's okay.

However, I'm really really sure he's either high-functioning or Aspergian, and I want to ask him about it because I'm undiagnosed and have had some crap psychologists in the past. It'd be really cool to have a friend in RL who could relate to some of the problems I have, but I know he'd be hugely self-conscious about it.

Any tips or plans of attack?



Cassia
Toucan
Toucan

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Joined: 28 Jun 2009
Age: 38
Gender: Female
Posts: 267

11 Aug 2010, 6:29 pm

One possibility might be, rather than asking first about himself, mentioning your thoughts about yourself. You could say that you've realized that some of your quirks fit into a certain pattern, and that that pattern seems consistent with the idea that you have Aspergers, and then perhaps explain what some of the quirks are, if that fits in the conversation. Or something to that effect.

If he knows he's autistic, that might encourage him to mention it about himself. If he doesn't know - well, he could have a variety of reactions. If your traits are ones he shares himself, he might think "hmm, that sounds like me" - at which point he might start considering the possibility for himself and realize that it fits him, and, like many people, be glad to find an explanation. Though he could also go into denial and say "No! That would be something wrong with me, and I don't have anything like that wrong with me, and so it can't apply to you either!"


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Now convinced that I'm a bit autistic, but still unsure if I'd qualify for a diagnosis, since it causes me few problems. Apparently people who are familiar with the autism spectrum can readily spot that I'm a bit autistic, though.