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13 Oct 2010, 9:10 pm

Did anyone happen to mention the cowards who let it happen? If you want something done right, you have to do it yourself. Communities need to stand up for what they believe in. If a group of people decide bullying is wrong, and do something about it, then bully's will have something to fear.

I had been the target of bully's for quite a while, but I made it clear to them I don't take their crap. I stood up for myself. One time, when I saw some kids being bullied, I stood up to the bullies who were doing it. I told the kids to knock it off, and they called me the "defender of retards", but they did walk away.

Communities have to not let it happen, not authority figures. Authority figures clearly don't mean a thing if they're not doing their job. I learned first hand what they do, because I was the one who got punished for the other kids teasing me.


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katzefrau
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13 Oct 2010, 10:35 pm

FireMinstrel wrote:
I was reading a blog about bullying, and it seemed to make a good point: the reason why bullies get away with what they do is because the people in charge also want to see the "undesirables" driven away.


that's the only explanation i've heard or can even think of that makes any sense as to why school administrators, bosses, etc ... parents .. don't always put a stop to it or blame the victim. sick but i believe it. it's easier to get rid of a problem than change the institution or culture that enables it.

here's the million dollar question:

why do the aspies here on WP sometimes bully each other? this is something i'm having a really hard time understanding.


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FireMinstrel
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13 Oct 2010, 11:33 pm

WHOA NOW!! !
Happymusic- don't think I'm pinning this solely on the school systems. This is humanity overall, from what I've seen and experienced. This happens at home(see the Haven for countless posts on how terrible people's families are), at work, in people's neighborhoods, etc. There was a post in the Haven not long ago about a member whose neighbors are trying to drive him/her out of their apartment.
Behavior seen as "irritating" or "annoying" by the majority, is dealt with severely. By parents, teachers, peers, bosses, co-workers, siblings, neighbors, etc. I'm not singling teachers out.
I started a post on how society acts like this, and everyone started talking about their bad school experiences. Yes, I said this is why bullying happens, but that includes bullying EVERYWHERE.



Last edited by FireMinstrel on 13 Oct 2010, 11:39 pm, edited 1 time in total.

DemonAbyss10
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13 Oct 2010, 11:36 pm

katzefrau wrote:
FireMinstrel wrote:
I was reading a blog about bullying, and it seemed to make a good point: the reason why bullies get away with what they do is because the people in charge also want to see the "undesirables" driven away.


that's the only explanation i've heard or can even think of that makes any sense as to why school administrators, bosses, etc ... parents .. don't always put a stop to it or blame the victim. sick but i believe it. it's easier to get rid of a problem than change the institution or culture that enables it.

here's the million dollar question:

why do the aspies here on WP sometimes bully each other? this is something i'm having a really hard time understanding.


Incompatable personality types. I tend to be VERY confrontational by nature though, like its just an instinct. For most people on the spectrum, I think its all a theory of mind thing on here. A large amount of the "bullying" is merely a reaction to disagreement amongst WP members. Some of us have take issue when challenged. something like that I think.


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bee33
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14 Oct 2010, 12:39 am

katzefrau wrote:
FireMinstrel wrote:
I was reading a blog about bullying, and it seemed to make a good point: the reason why bullies get away with what they do is because the people in charge also want to see the "undesirables" driven away.


that's the only explanation i've heard or can even think of that makes any sense as to why school administrators, bosses, etc ... parents .. don't always put a stop to it or blame the victim. sick but i believe it. it's easier to get rid of a problem than change the institution or culture that enables it.

here's the million dollar question:

why do the aspies here on WP sometimes bully each other? this is something i'm having a really hard time understanding.
I think there are two kinds of bullying, or at least not-niceness that crop up here.

One is the perceived need to fight for one's position, which is frankly kind of pointless, since someone with an opposing view is probably not going to be persuaded by a forum post. But I feel that way myself sometimes, when someone posts something I consider mean toward a group or individual. I might state my position but after a couple of posts I just let it rest, or try to.

The other kind I think comes from bitterness, frustration and loneliness.And I don't mean those as insults. People often try to insult someone (in real life) by saying "You're such an angry person," as if someone would choose to be angry or upset. I think bitterness and sadness can cause people to lash out.

Not that I'm excusing either of these behaviors. I'm looking for explanations too.



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14 Oct 2010, 1:05 am

DemonAbyss10 wrote:
this is why ive always had a thing against authority. They oftentimes are just as bad, if not worse than the bullies and whatnot.


Anarchism IS the best way to organize things ;)


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Keeno
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14 Oct 2010, 7:12 am

One thing I find dismaying is that states are far from immune to this sickest of unspoken rules. An example of this was the Swedish eugenics program, which ran from about the 1940s to 1970s, which someone spoke to me about yesterday. This targeted people with mental conditions and those who were so-called "deviant". However they were far from being the only state with such a programme, and it is Finland who sterilised the most people per capita out of post-war eugenics programmes. Countries in that region of the world like to boast that they are a model society, but this is a perversion of that sense of being a model society. It's this eugenics argument, that exactly explains the tacit, passive acceptance of bullying whether in school, or wherever.



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14 Oct 2010, 7:52 am

Wow, Keeno. I'm gonna have to read up on all that.
Actually, surrogate pregnancies are very similar. People pay top dollar to get eggs from pretty ladies who have high SAT scores and are the picture of physical and mental health.
Hell, I'm sure that if this keeps up, even the people considered superior now will be inferior in 100 years time. Too bad they won't live to see that irony.



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14 Oct 2010, 8:39 am

They're similar in that they're eugenic, but different in that at least the idea is not about trying to pre-empt "undesirables" being born, at least it's a more positive approach of trying to have healthy offspring. I still think surrogate pregnancy of this type is nonsense though when it's about people trying to be happy, healthy and "normal" out of a sense of entitlement, paying top dollar to try not to have offspring who have what they may feel are distressing peculiarities.



FireMinstrel
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14 Oct 2010, 9:38 am

Makes me wonder what would happen if the surrogate baby turned out to be autistic or have some other issue. Would the couple demand their money back?(I'm only half-joking here)



Clyde
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14 Oct 2010, 12:08 pm

happymusic wrote:
I'm a teacher at a large high school.....*snip*


I mean no offense, and maybe this is due to my past, but I don't believe one word you say. I have heard enough of those words told to me by teachers about how they care for the underdog, how they hate bullying. Yet none of them actually helped me. I don't believe one word of you saying you love your nerds and hate bullying.



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14 Oct 2010, 12:11 pm

Clyde wrote:
happymusic wrote:
I'm a teacher at a large high school.....*snip*


I mean no offense, and maybe this is due to my past, but I don't believe one word you say. I have heard enough of those words told to me by teachers about how they care for the underdog, how they hate bullying. Yet none of them actually helped me. I don't believe one word of you saying you love your nerds and hate bullying.


There are good teachers out there. I was bullied in year 7 so I told the head of year, and she helped a LOT. She put me in a room away from normal classes for the day until she sorted the bully out, then she found the bully and made sure he behaved, then she rung his parents and told them everything - because of it, his parents refused to get him the PS3 he wanted. Hell, the next day, he even came and apologised to me, then he left me the f**k alone.



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14 Oct 2010, 12:47 pm

with the history of humanity at constant war with each other and the epidemic of group stalking, workplace mobbing, cause stalking...etc. Humans are destined to self destruct. People are a socially canabalistic species.

Here are some links about group stalking

http://www.multistalkervictims.org/lawson.htm

http://www.multistalkervictims.org/

http://gangstalkingworld.com/what-is-gang-stalking/


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KissOfMarmaladeSky
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14 Oct 2010, 1:44 pm

I've actually dealt with that kind of situation before. My fifth grade teacher not only let the kids in my class bully me, but she harrassed me as well.



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14 Oct 2010, 3:02 pm

"They" can and do allow us to be bullied and are therefore implicity condoning bullying. To ignore one who is bullying another, to passively watch it occur, is an act of cowardice.

Primarily I think it's due to 'the path of least resistance' where it's simpy easier to 'look the other way' although an innocent is being slaughtered. Plus, if the one being bullied is an Aspie (or other ASD) "they" can regard us as lesser, or at least not worthy of the respect that other members of our society are due. To exclude is far easier than taking the time/effort to act truthfully.


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14 Oct 2010, 5:12 pm

Well I'm happy to say that the original allegation is completely unfounded, at least where I work. I have never seen bullying of any kind condoned in any degree by any member of staff. :roll:


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