How can you be happy about a diagnosis of Autism?

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Adamantus
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07 Nov 2010, 2:43 pm

I just found out that I have Autism, it seem very likely anyway. Everyone here seems the same as me and I can relate to what most people are saying. I just wonder what you're supposed to do once you have a diagnosis of this? I feel like I know why I failed in my previous jobs, why I can't talk to people, why I get hurt in every social encounter, and it looks like there is no cure for this. I've recently learnt EFT which is a godsend but although it allows me to feel perfectly peaceful and calm on the inside, I still wonder what I'm supposed to do for a job, and whether I can ever really relate to people. I feel bitter and really upset and I don't know what to do.



ooOoOoOAnaOoOoOoo
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07 Nov 2010, 2:56 pm

What to do when you find out you have autism? Just go on living your life. That's what I've always done, before I knew I was autistic and after. Knowing doesn't change things much.



Asp-Z
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07 Nov 2010, 3:02 pm

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How can you be happy about a diagnosis of Autism?


Pretty easily. You're stuck with it no matter what you think of it, so you might as well be positive about it.



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07 Nov 2010, 3:03 pm

Nothing about you has changed just because you now know there's a name for the problems you've had your entire life. You'd have continued to have them whether or not anyone knew the name for this. At least with a diagnosis you can learn more about it and come to some conclusions about your different options. Without a diagnosis you would have probably continued to blame yourself and beat your head against the wall.

Since all Aspies are different, no one can accurately tell you what you will or will not eventually be capable of. If you're trying to ask what you should do, I'd say to study this more in-depth and read whatever you can about it. You'll find a Career and Job forum here on WP in which there are many threads discussing employment difficulties and successes.

But it's not like receiving a diagnosis of terminal Cancer. You're no worse off now knowing you're Aspie than you ever were or ever will be. You're still just you, only now you have a community of like-minded people to talk to about certain things.



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07 Nov 2010, 3:03 pm

Uh not get worked up about something you cant control? Easy street is the best way :pig:


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Simonono
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07 Nov 2010, 3:37 pm

I've never accepted it, which probably isn't the right thing to do. But I can't just ignore it and get on with things because it stops that



Adamantus
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07 Nov 2010, 3:42 pm

I'm really having trouble holding all this back, I just really need to vent this out so please don't be offended.

:| You are right when you say that nothing has really changed it's just that I have more understanding. It just feels as though I've lost any personality I ever had. All I am now is some ignorant person who doesn't know what's going on. All people do is laugh at me and all my good qualities are is some sort of problem. Everyone around me is fake, I can't hold down a job and all the while the wider political situation just means that were all heading for 1984 anyway. The emotional blindness means there's no hope of humanity ever understanding itself and the best I can hope for is spiritual enlightenment but probably living on the street as it doesn't seem compatible with a job. All the people in the jobs want is to work you to death 40 hours a week, I can't do that anymore and I don't believe in it. I know something better. I've been thinking about this all the time and it's basically the only thing I can do on the outside.

Since writing the first part of this message I feel a lot better and peaceful. I don't feel the anger anymore. I just wonder whether if I go out there, will I just end up with more bad memories to deal with?



Jediscraps
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07 Nov 2010, 3:47 pm

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All the people in the jobs want is to work you to death 40 hours a week, I can't do that anymore and I don't believe in it. I know something better. I've been thinking about this all the time and it's basically the only thing I can do on the outside.



I agree with this. I've had a real hard time dealing with the dichotomy of knowing what should be better and dealing with the world as it is. I tried asking for help about this question and no one seemed to understand what I was talking about. Well, the couple people I asked. I mean, this question has been extremely hard for me.

I'm curious, did you say you were actually diagnosed? Did a professional suggest you were autistic?



Last edited by Jediscraps on 07 Nov 2010, 3:48 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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07 Nov 2010, 3:47 pm

You just have to find your niche. Before you were diagnosed, you had fun things you did to entertain yourself. You still have them! Just try to be happy in life doing your own thing and good fortune will be yours :)
No sense in thinking your way to a major depression. Think of the good things and don't focus so much on what you see as negatives. Think of every cliche you've ever heard or read because sometimes they help.



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07 Nov 2010, 4:00 pm

Adamantus wrote:
I just found out that I have Autism, it seem very likely anyway. Everyone here seems the same as me and I can relate to what most people are saying. I just wonder what you're supposed to do once you have a diagnosis of this? I feel like I know why I failed in my previous jobs, why I can't talk to people, why I get hurt in every social encounter, and it looks like there is no cure for this. I've recently learnt EFT which is a godsend but although it allows me to feel perfectly peaceful and calm on the inside, I still wonder what I'm supposed to do for a job, and whether I can ever really relate to people. I feel bitter and really upset and I don't know what to do.


Adamantus wrote:
I just found out that I have Autism, it seem very likely anyway.


One step closer in knowing yourself.

Adamantus wrote:
Everyone here seems the same as me and I can relate to what most people are saying.


Kindred spirits :)

Adamantus wrote:
I just wonder what you're supposed to do once you have a diagnosis of this?


That is a choice up to you, for example you could look into it further. Nothing changed except you perception :wink:

Adamantus wrote:
I feel like I know why I failed in my previous jobs, why I can't talk to people, why I get hurt in every social encounter


Makes lot of sense now, huh?

Adamantus wrote:
and it looks like there is no cure for this.

Not up until this point and not likely in the near future. For finding a cure it must be a affliction and/or disease first, this has not been proven to be so as of yet.

Adamantus wrote:
I've recently learnt EFT which is a godsend but although it allows me to feel perfectly peaceful and calm on the inside


Good to hear you are on top of the emotional problems.

Adamantus wrote:
I still wonder what I'm supposed to do for a job


You could ask yourself questions like:
What am I good at?
What do you like to do?
What troubles did I encounter in my previous job?
What positive things did I encounter in my previous job?

Adamantus wrote:
and whether I can ever really relate to people


You did say the following: "Everyone here seems the same as me and I can relate to what most people are saying.". Time will tell for the rest of the world, but until that time welcome fellow alien :alien:.

Adamantus wrote:
I feel bitter and really upset and I don't know what to do.


Give it time, talk with people here on the forum and in reallife, get to know your strengths and pitfalls and accept yourself. That's all the advice I can think of atm.

Cheerfully,
Wallourdes


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Adamantus
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07 Nov 2010, 4:01 pm

Jediscraps wrote:
I agree with this. I've had a real hard time dealing with the dichotomy of knowing what should be better and dealing with the world as it is. I tried asking for help about this question and no one seemed to understand what I was talking about. Well, the couple people I asked. I mean, this question has been extremely hard for me.

I'm curious, did you say you were actually diagnosed? Did a professional suggest you were autistic?


I have to say the most amazing and profound aspect of this is that every person on this website understands what I'm talking about, even when I only provide hints and guesses. It's really weird actually, until now I was completely alone in this, I knew I was probably among a select few but didn't know who/where they were. The only thing I dream about now is setting up an open-source village in the area. I've been thinking of how to set up a discussion group in the area for it so that in a few years I could do it. If any of you live in North England (Newcastle especially) and are interested in just the discussion of this please contact me. Also recommend looking on Open Farm Tech (you'll be on there for hours if you're anything like me.)

My therapist suggested I was probably Autistic, that's enough for me. I also did online tests to check. I'll be going to see a psychologist to talk about this as well, he'll be able to give me a better idea.

BWT. I've been focusing on this for ages now, finding my place in society, funny how what you focus on happens, good or bad, you create your own reality.



Jediscraps
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07 Nov 2010, 4:11 pm

Yeah, a professional talks to me about the spectrum all the time. I have my doubts sometimes, and I relate more to people here than any other place, it seems. I have my doubts though. But it explains a lot. My counselor explained it to me as a social learning disability. But it's probably more complicated than that.
Work has always been harder for me and it causes me worry and stress and most would consider my job quite easy. I worry about going homeless a lot but this counselor assured me that there's a safety net for me if worse came to worse. I mean, the structure and organization of our society causes me stress as well. I don't think I'd want to go on disability though.



Adamantus
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07 Nov 2010, 4:22 pm

Jediscraps wrote:
Work has always been harder for me and it causes me constant worry and stress and most would consider my job quite easy. I worry about going homeless a lot but this counselor assured me that there's a safety net for me if worse came to worse. I don't think I'd want to go on disability though.


I wouldn't worry about being homeless, I've beem out of work for a year and nothing bad happens (I had to proove it to myself though). I have to say I think in those terms too, it's part of what makes work seem intolerable and cruel. Work or you'll die, that's what they're telling us isn't it? I have my parents who are great and have also been given benefits all this time. It's not that I want the benefits, I don't want to take from others, (there goes another piece of thought control), but if I work I am in pain and I can't even do 40hrs a week. Given the choices, I'd rather go open source. It's completely different. I could do an 18hr work day for that, it's just so me.

It's interesting that people say that this isn't necessarily a condition?



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07 Nov 2010, 4:22 pm

Live your life to the fullest and celebrate your differences. :)

That's what I do.


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Jediscraps
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07 Nov 2010, 4:32 pm

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It's interesting that people say that this isn't necessarily a condition?



It seems some say this. I don't fully understand that. If this condition is what allows me to look at this society from the outside and gives me my point of view, then I prefer it. I prefer being dis-integrated, it allows me to be the contradiction between the world as it is and how it should be. I feel sort of wild. I've also had a homeless plan which would allow me to be even more free and it's calmed that fear.



Last edited by Jediscraps on 07 Nov 2010, 4:58 pm, edited 2 times in total.