My life is a mess. I am 16 year old male with Aspergers.?

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laxos3
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17 Nov 2010, 12:39 pm

I am 16 years old suffer from aspergers syndrome (Mild Autism) therefore i have social issues and cant make true friends and have problems talking with friends i have or even seeing them. I am really depressed refused to go to school now im Home schooling myself, I never get out of the house i hate sports and i am generally afraid of the world and insecure of being seen with family. I have never had a girlfriend and i really want someone i can love and they can love me because i feel as if i am not loved and i really want to have someone like that. But im too shy and insecure and i dont get out so wheres there to meet anyone. All i do is sleep and play video games and even video games i am getting bored of and have no motivation to do anything but sit and sleep. I feel like **** and think about suicide constantly although im on a mild anxiety medication called St Johns Wort but it doesnt help me really. I kinda want to die but im scared of death. I feel like i have no life because i havnt gotten out of the house in over a month besides going to the doctor... I really just want someone who gives me a reason to live that i can love and care about, to motivate me to live. At the moment i have no reason to live.



Vector
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17 Nov 2010, 12:44 pm

Find something to get involved in. What are you interested in?


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17 Nov 2010, 12:51 pm

laxos3 wrote:
I am 16 years old suffer from aspergers syndrome (Mild Autism) therefore i have social issues and cant make true friends and have problems talking with friends i have or even seeing them. I am really depressed refused to go to school now im Home schooling myself, I never get out of the house i hate sports and i am generally afraid of the world and insecure of being seen with family. I have never had a girlfriend and i really want someone i can love and they can love me because i feel as if i am not loved and i really want to have someone like that. But im too shy and insecure and i dont get out so wheres there to meet anyone. All i do is sleep and play video games and even video games i am getting bored of and have no motivation to do anything but sit and sleep. I feel like **** and think about suicide constantly although im on a mild anxiety medication called St Johns Wort but it doesnt help me really. I kinda want to die but im scared of death. I feel like i have no life because i havnt gotten out of the house in over a month besides going to the doctor... I really just want someone who gives me a reason to live that i can love and care about, to motivate me to live. At the moment i have no reason to live.


I'm a 16 year old male Aspie too, and I can relate to a lot of this.

You said you like video games. This can be a good way to make friends. If you're on a console, try doing some online gaming. If you know anyone else who's into gaming, play with them. I always hear people at my college on about how they're beating each other in games and how good they are etc.

You said you wanted a girlfriend and to feel loved... Don't we all, eh. I actually feel pretty lonely at the moment, too. But if you start talking more you can meet someone.

Recently I started being braver and talking to more people in my day-to-day life and I have been very surprised with the number of people who've actually started talking to me and generally being friendly as a result. I'm even talking to a few girls in some of my classes.

This stuff might be harder for you since you're now home schooled, but you can go out and meet people in other places - though, TBH, that'd be harder to do than just talking to people in school, but hey, no pain no gain. The way I see it, you ain't got nothing to lose by trying.

Another thing I and a lot of Aspies do is focus on obsessions. Whatever your Aspie obsession(s) are/is, research and get involved in it if you can. Doing so tends to make us happy and take our mind of negativity too.

I hope I've been helpful :)



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17 Nov 2010, 1:31 pm

Not much advice to give, but take joy in the thought that you know about AS at your young age before you make some of the bigger life decisions. Best place to be to think through what is best for you and make strategically-smart choices for your situation.



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17 Nov 2010, 3:21 pm

laxos3 wrote:
I am 16 years old suffer from aspergers syndrome (Mild Autism) therefore i have social issues and cant make true friends and have problems talking with friends i have or even seeing them. I am really depressed refused to go to school now im Home schooling myself, I never get out of the house i hate sports and i am generally afraid of the world and insecure of being seen with family. I have never had a girlfriend and i really want someone i can love and they can love me because i feel as if i am not loved and i really want to have someone like that. But im too shy and insecure and i dont get out so wheres there to meet anyone. All i do is sleep and play video games and even video games i am getting bored of and have no motivation to do anything but sit and sleep. I feel like **** and think about suicide constantly although im on a mild anxiety medication called St Johns Wort but it doesnt help me really. I kinda want to die but im scared of death. I feel like i have no life because i havnt gotten out of the house in over a month besides going to the doctor... I really just want someone who gives me a reason to live that i can love and care about, to motivate me to live. At the moment i have no reason to live.


I can relate to pretty much all of this, I'm refusing to go to college at the moment, I never leave the house other than to go for random walks, I hate sports too, I hate being seen with my mum, I want someone to love but I CANNOT talk to girls AT ALL and girls don't make the first move which is totally sexist, all I do is play video games and sometimes drawing if I feel like it, I feel like I want to die all the time and have no reason to live either. Sorry I have no solution because I am in the same boat, at least you ain't the only one :)



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17 Nov 2010, 4:20 pm

laxos3 wrote:
I am 16 years old suffer from aspergers syndrome (Mild Autism) therefore i have social issues and cant make true friends and have problems talking with friends i have or even seeing them. I am really depressed refused to go to school now im Home schooling myself, I never get out of the house i hate sports and i am generally afraid of the world and insecure of being seen with family. I have never had a girlfriend and i really want someone i can love and they can love me because i feel as if i am not loved and i really want to have someone like that. But im too shy and insecure and i dont get out so wheres there to meet anyone. All i do is sleep and play video games and even video games i am getting bored of and have no motivation to do anything but sit and sleep. I feel like **** and think about suicide constantly although im on a mild anxiety medication called St Johns Wort but it doesnt help me really. I kinda want to die but im scared of death. I feel like i have no life because i havnt gotten out of the house in over a month besides going to the doctor... I really just want someone who gives me a reason to live that i can love and care about, to motivate me to live. At the moment i have no reason to live.

St. John's wort isn't strong enough for most people and might not even contain the right medicine for you. You need to see a psychiatrist. Also 16 is still pretty young for getting a girlfriend and there is tons of time. Most people with ASDs are not emotionally mature enough at 16 to make a relationship work anyway. Your chances of getting a girlfriend will improve once you get older and get psychiatric help.


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17 Nov 2010, 4:24 pm

Do you do online friends? I'm 17 and also don't leave the house for months at a time and didn't finish school.



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17 Nov 2010, 5:53 pm

laxos3 wrote:
I am 16 years old suffer from aspergers syndrome (Mild Autism) therefore i have social issues and cant make true friends and have problems talking with friends i have or even seeing them. I am really depressed refused to go to school now im Home schooling myself, I never get out of the house i hate sports and i am generally afraid of the world and insecure of being seen with family. I have never had a girlfriend and i really want someone i can love and they can love me because i feel as if i am not loved and i really want to have someone like that. But im too shy and insecure and i dont get out so wheres there to meet anyone. All i do is sleep and play video games and even video games i am getting bored of and have no motivation to do anything but sit and sleep. I feel like **** and think about suicide constantly although im on a mild anxiety medication called St Johns Wort but it doesnt help me really. I kinda want to die but im scared of death. I feel like i have no life because i havnt gotten out of the house in over a month besides going to the doctor... I really just want someone who gives me a reason to live that i can love and care about, to motivate me to live. At the moment i have no reason to live.

I'm 9 years older than you but I can relate as well. I'm starting to get out of my shell slowly. I'm talking to people in my classes, I joined a few groups on Meetup and recently I started running and biking with a group of people as well. I still have a ways to go but I think I'm making OK progress.

I think primetime for Aspies are in our 20s-30s.



stargirl
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18 Nov 2010, 8:05 am

I can relate to a lot of this as well, as a 16 year old girl. I still feel so depressed and it all started when I began high school and lost all my primary school friends. I've gotten a bit better this year but the depressed feeling never reallly goes away, keeps coming back and I feel like I want to die, but I'm too scared to actually do it. School makes me feel really anxious, especially having to talk to other people when I don't know what to say or do.....Sometimes I'm really happy and sometimes really sad and depressed. I've never had a boyfriend, I don't have a social life at all out of school, don't go out anywhere, don't talk to anyone besides family. It's kind of sad when you think about it. Anyway, I think you should try talking online to other people, it makes you feel better and takes your mind off being depressed. Do something you really enjoy, I think it'll take your mind off it.