Jobs which Aspies would probably not be good at. (Funny)

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Perhaps this seems a little counterintuitive - after all, aren't we supposed to be thinking about our strengths? - but I thought it could be a chance to have a little fun.

What jobs do you think an aspie really wouldn't be good at? Explain why and have a bit of fun with it.

My contribution: I don't think an aspie would make a good old-fashioned mafia member. They spend so much time talking in metaphors and implying things that the average aspie would be totally lost! Cement shoes? Protection - from what? From you? Why would I need...? I'm lost! Cross mafioso off my list of potential jobs please.

Next?

This reminds me of something my mom used to say to me when I was a kid.
#1: "Chris, you can do anything that you set your mind to do, except basketball and opera singing."
#2: "Chris, someday you'll cure cancer. But on that day you will forget your shoes, and your jacket, and your lunch, and your notes ..."

Used car salesman

Working in a call center.

Politician (I can't look you in the eye, but, trust me; I'll be a great governor! ).

Kindergarten teacher (...off in a corner by myself playing with the legos while the kids run wild? Yeah... So? ).

Office manager (known on the job as a lazy crank who constantly complains -- mis-hears, misunderstands instructions given, can't get much in the way of work done -- that the overhead lights are too loud ).

Waiter/Restauranteur ("You really MUST keep the carrots out of the mashed potatoes. No. I mean, really." )

Social events director at a resort [or, on a cruise ship, or even at a nursing home; doesn't much matter where] ("What? Social Whaaat ??" )


You're right; fun topic; thanks for posting it.
Liz
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Working in Brookstone. "Don't interrupt me with your silly questions about that automatic bottle opener, I'm playing with the helicopter!"
Marriage counselor. "Well, seeing as you two can't get along, the best solution is to break up. Simple!" (I'm far too obvious and oblivious to give relationship advice to most people)

anything but the most monotonous and basic of jobs. i could probably be a pretty fair parser of flypoop from pepper, so long as i had a nice orthopaedic chair and the proper tools.

Chef or anyone in a restaurant kitchen: I guess Gordon Ramsay's programs threw that dream in the bin... I like to cook, but not when I only have 30 seconds to do so...

Fast food clerk: there is always something beeping in those darn places... i've often wondered why fast food clerks don't go mad after eight plus long hours of stuff beeping.

bus driver: you drive a vehicle quite a bit larger and heavier than the average car, bike or pedestrian... the urge to go on a GTA-style rampage would be far too great

truck driver: same reason as above

office manager: I could probably be quite a good manager considering I don't have a God complex like many of them do... plus I have a good overview of things I need to do.... but the stress maight be a bit too hard to handle for me

Escort. You can't bring an awkward guy to a wedding!
Politician for sure. Look me in the eye, and tell me a lie, and don't stutter or pause, or else people won't take up your cause!
Any kind of soulless sales job where you directly sell things

Evil genius I could do, so long as I was an angry and eclectic type of evil genius, the man behind the curtain type.

School Bus Driver
Beat Cop
Foreman (usually)
Direct Sales (I checked. . )

i could do cop strict set of rules, it's either right, or it's not

unfortuneately i couldnt run enough to pass a physical!

i couldnt sell anything either, i feel guilty taking people's money

totally understand re kindy teacher, ive done childcare and yeah the toys are distracting...

oh and the fast food beeping...eww know exactly what you mean

hmmm

talk show host pass

I don't think an Aspie would make a good cheer leader. It requires too much enthusiasm and for what? A bunch of people trying to get a ball from point a to point b?

How about anything to do with team sports? Except in the spirit of anthropology. I won't usually enter any contest if I don't expect to get a prize. No filling out the field for me.