[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zQWXfHzOKUU&feature=related[/youtube]
O Holy Night - Josh Groban
I am not associated with any religion.
I am speaking in a very general sense.
When I speak of Holy...
I simply mean something so...
sacred...pure...good.
Your child shall remember the good times
he has had with you...the parents.
For that to happen...
you have to be there...
you have to engage in life...
and with your child.
A child loves attention...
affection...learning.
Look at your child...
hold him close and let him speak...
that which is important to him...
and truly listen.
Let him know that he can speak of anything to you...
of any problems...of his desires in life.
Let him know you are always there for him...
that you are on his side...
that you will support him in times of correctness...
and that you will guide him to correctness should he be wrong.
Let him know that regardless what happens...
you shall love him more than anyone or anything...
that you are on the same team.
Life is made up of accumulated memories.
The mind remembers that which stands out...
good and bad.
To have had an uneventful life...
is to have had a short and shallow one...
no matter the number of years one has lived.
The bad times allows you to conquer and grow.
It gives you an opportunity to use your imagination...
to devise a plan of corrective action...
to show your child how to handle life's challenges...
so he may do the same...
and so...
teach his children the same.
The good times enrich life immeasurably.
With his knowledge of your unconditional love for him...
he will not fear venturing forth...
as he knows that should he make a mistake...
although he may get scolded...
he shall never lose your love of him.
His life shall be filled with sweet memories of...
being held tenderly...
of having had...
heart to heart...
and...
soul to soul talks...
with those whom love him the most...
and with those whom he loves the most.
This bonding of parent and child...
is crucial to his future views of...
life...
and how he interacts with it.
Every day is an opportunity...
to demonstrate your true love for your child.
A day without true engagement with your child...
is a day lost...forever...
for both.
By taking time to explain things to him...
by explaining concepts...
morals...
what is in store for him in life...
the full looking into his eyes...
as he speaks his heart to you...
the sharing of your wisdom...
the efficient path for him to follow...
is demonstrated...
Love.
The gentle holding of him...
the tender kisses on his forehead...
the warm hugs...
is demonstrated...
Affection.
The praise of him when he does well...
tells him that you were truly paying attention to him...
and that you truly care.
This motivates him to earn more praise...
by doing better and more.
This is the essence of...
Positive Reinforcement.
Do not fall for the old adage...
that expresses
too much affection or love...
will end up spoiling the child.
A child is spoiled by not setting limits...
or by letting the child cross the limits...
without correction.
To withhold love or affection...
tells him that your love is conditional...
that you are manipulating him...
with something that should be sacred.
I do not care if a DR. says to not give your child...
unreserved love and affection...
he would be wrong...
if everyone in the world thought it to be true...
then the world would be wrong.
My Mother raised me with unconditional love.
When I had done something out of impulse...
that was bad...
it was not the punishment from my Father...
that I had feared.
It was the look of disappointment in...
my Mother's eyes...
that I could not bear.
It was because of this...
that I was not a bad child.
I may have done impulsive things...
that were not correct...
they were...however...
not borne of evil.
With unreserved...
unconditional...
and demonstrated...
Love...
Affection...
Positive Reinforcement...
You cannot fail as a parent...
and so...
the success of your child...
shall be...
a foregone conclusion.
18 Dec 2010, 10:03 am
