female aspies with perfect eye contact and body language?

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antonblock
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30 Dec 2010, 5:37 pm

Hi there,

i know a woman who is very highly sensitive, clumpsy, but her body language is really good, and she also expects others to do eye contact.

So my question therefore is: do there also exist female, (unnoticed) aspies with "normal" body language, and good eye contact? Or is this very unlikely?

thanks,
anton



tyuiop159
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30 Dec 2010, 6:02 pm

I have good eye contact and great body language. I don't know if this is uncommon. I show most of the other signs of Asperger's, though, like obsessive tendencies and low social understanding.



antonblock
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30 Dec 2010, 6:07 pm

hi, thats intersting to hear, :-)

please tell me more about your symptoms and problems and coping strategies.

byebye,
anton



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30 Dec 2010, 7:53 pm

If I turn out to be an aspie, I'm in this category. I pretty much have all the signs except for this.


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30 Dec 2010, 7:58 pm

Ha, I wish.


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30 Dec 2010, 8:41 pm

antonblock wrote:
Hi there,

i know a woman who is very highly sensitive, clumpsy, but her body language is really good, and she also expects others to do eye contact.

So my question therefore is: do there also exist female, (unnoticed) aspies with "normal" body language, and good eye contact? Or is this very unlikely?

thanks,
anton


hmm she might have another condition, who knows? Im sure there must be other conditions out there which a person could display symptoms like that. Im like the opposite, im not sensitive or clumsy, but my body language and my eye contact kinda suck.



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31 Dec 2010, 1:20 am

Mine is pretty normal- to most.



buryuntime
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31 Dec 2010, 1:40 am

antonblock wrote:
Hi there,

i know a woman who is very highly sensitive, clumpsy, but her body language is really good, and she also expects others to do eye contact.

So my question therefore is: do there also exist female, (unnoticed) aspies with "normal" body language, and good eye contact? Or is this very unlikely?

thanks,
anton

Very unlikely. What made you think of autism? Maybe she has a motor disorder or is just a sensitive person. Social impairment is a core part of it, along with repetitive interests and behaviour and communication problems. Being clumsy and sensitive aren't even in the criteria.



antonblock
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31 Dec 2010, 7:00 am

yeah, but according to the criteria there exists a ratio of 6:1 in male to female.... and many think its not gender specific.



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31 Dec 2010, 9:19 am

Yes, there are many. Female autistic people often seem to be good at using echopraxia to imitate other people's body language. I'm confused by the reply that this means a person has no social impairment. There is a lot more to social impairment than one's ability to imitate normal body language. (Also another autistic person may not be the best judge of whether someone's body language is "perfect".)


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radioflyer57
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31 Dec 2010, 11:11 am

It could also be that she's learned to make eye contact and to adapt her body language over the years. Clumsiness and sensitivity, on the other hand, are much harder to change.



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31 Dec 2010, 12:05 pm

anbuend wrote:
Yes, there are many. Female autistic people often seem to be good at using echopraxia to imitate other people's body language. I'm confused by the reply that this means a person has no social impairment. There is a lot more to social impairment than one's ability to imitate normal body language. (Also another autistic person may not be the best judge of whether someone's body language is "perfect".)

Impairment of nonverbal language is a core aspect of Asperger's Syndrome. Someone with perfect body language isn't autistic, it's as simple as that. I'm still flabbergasted at why everybody keeps saying females are somehow drastically different. I'm not and I also have a sister who is not.



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31 Dec 2010, 12:40 pm

I can use body language pretty well if I consciously think about it and (on good days) I don't feel uncomfortable keeping eyecontact but I'm not always sure on how I am suposed to do it so I tend to stare or fluctuate between the other persons eyes.

I am better then avrage at reading bodylanguage so I can compensate with words for what I don't know how to say with my body.

But as anbuend said, much of my bodylanguge is echopraxia so sometimes what I show is not at all what I mean.

And there is no doubt that I'm an aspie (and a female :lol: )



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31 Dec 2010, 5:17 pm

With practice, yep--we learn to fake it pretty well. I was recently told that I "seem normal during casual conversation". It looks for all the world like I'm making eye contact because I've trained myself to look past people's heads or at their mouths. I don't really know how my body language is because I'm not really aware of it. I tend to sit pretty still when I'm concentrating on talking, though.


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31 Dec 2010, 5:37 pm

My behaviour and eye contact is normal with a few people that I'm very familiar with. With everybody else, it is unnatural and sometimes can make people feel uncomfortable so I try to avoid things like shaking hands, eye contact, hugging, kissing, etc. I never know what to say, when I'm supposed to hug, shake hands, where to put my hands, etc. It makes me anxious.



aspicious
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25 Jan 2012, 1:11 am

OKaaaay ; i'm not sure why some folks are on this forum to fight each other - or rock the boat.....arent we all in the "same boat" here ???

i'm an adult female ive been on my own for over a decade.

ive NEVER had a problem w/ eye contact ie with making it....though ive been told persistently that some things that are "elementary" in nature...concepts that are normal to most people elude me and when i can't figure out what someone is trying to tell me i will stare the hell out of them. otherwise ; my eye contact is normal. NEVER do i fail to make it.

i move my body in very feminine ways ; i walk in an almost suggestive manner; hip swinging etc. no i dont do it on purpose

those are about the two most NON-AUTISTIC traits you can think of....

now - here are the others.....

1 ) i'm clumsy as hell. i trip over my own feet ; others feet and nothing at all
2) i'm highly sensitive to taste; temperature, lighting and other sensory elements
3) i get "over-stimulated" at the drop of a hat....
4) i have a perfectly healthy functioning body but never learned to ride a bike and can't even keep up w/ paddling one of those inflatable rafts.
5) i couldnt catch a ball if you threw it directly at me
6) i take things so literally its a joke. to everyone but me
7) i freeze up in unfamiliar situations and have difficulty w/ random social pleasantries like smiling, and even nodding and dont even expect me to greet a stranger ( i barely even greet back unless there would be consequences for not doing so )
8) sex. sex sucks. i do better with me than someone else. pathetic but true. something about the "reciprocity / give-and-take" impairment
9) relationships. i dont have a boyfriend, can't get one to save my life. am considered above average looking. can get a 1st date, but not a second date. not EVER
10) have to work very hard at friendships, both acquiring and maintaining
11) i have a ridiculously high IQ but trouble remembering what i had for lunch earlier. but can recite shakespeare and the canterbury tales on demand.
12 ) i have to keep my mouth shut in social settings, cuz i say things ad lib that are either stupid or extremely offensive
13) i can't fall asleep unless its pitch dark AND i am smothered with a blanket. if its hot weather; i'll turn the air way up just so i can have my blanket and not be too warm.
14) i can't fake liking someone, nor can i carry on small talk or chit-chat w/out exerting so much energy i feel like passing out
15) i can talk for hours about something i like / want / need but have trouble focusing on a five minute conversation that doesnt interest me
16) i can only have : at most - a few friends.
17) when forced to interact w/ "helping professionals" such as employees of a hospital, clinic, or other human service agency : i will pick ONE individual i feel comfortable with and deal only w/ them to the exclusion of everyone else.
18) when i dine at a favorite restaurant; i want the same food prepared the same way and presented by the same server

if this all leaves ANYone in doubt that i have asperger's....then you dont know much about the condition.

ALLS I'M SAYING IS : DONT LET EYE CONTACT - or body language be a decisive factor in the face of so many OTHER non-negotiable elements of autism.....



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