bad in playing a role, too?

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Hi there,

often i am confused about people, at some instance they are nice to me, and then i see them unhappy. Its probably because they want to see that they like me, but actually they feel unhappy. This somehow always confused me, that people pretend to be different in order for something, I somehow wondered, why people can't just be like there are.

For me its different, I usually don't act something, at least not very much. I hardly get, why i should do this and that like that, when i don't know the exact reasons why i should do so. It seems to be more honest to me.

To give an example, i once went out with a friend, and saw a girl i knew on the other table with another man, and i greeted her, but she didn't greet back. I wondered why she didn't greet me, and my friend explained to me, that she probably does this in order to pay full attention to the other man, and not to irritate him. That sounded strange to me, i wondered why she couldn't be just like she is, but ok i slowly get the point, but wonder how she knows all that, and why i don't know that.

ok, maybe someone has already some idea of the big picture in all that, and can give me some hints.

anton

re: your example -I had someone do that or rather studiously avoid acknowledging me in a social setting. Ironically he had been actively pursuing me. He was with a woman and I realized she was his girlfriend (who I had no clue existed-he certainly didn't tell me). Aside from his ass-hattedness , perhaps your friend's boyfriend is crazy jealous and she didn't want to start anything. In my case, the woman had good reason.