Saying things, being too close, not close enough....ARGGGH!

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Joined: 10 Jan 2011
Gender: Male
Posts: 9

17 Jan 2011, 12:01 am

Social rules are so stupid. I don't understand this crap at all.

I am at the point where I am terrified of meeting other people. Afraid to introduce myself, fearful of rejection, of saying the wrong thing, of being unacceptable in my behavior. Now while I do not give a damn what anyone thinks of me on the street, once I actually initiate effort to talk to a person it bothers me when they react like i am some kind of leper. It is really awful. I am sure most of you have had to deal with this in one way or another.

Since I am not in school it is very difficult to even make any friends at all. Being a traveling trainhopper makes it hard too. I have made friends in my travels, but it is so hard even to introduce myself to another street kid because I am scared I will mess up and they will hate me, ignore me, not want me around.

Since I have no innate knowledge of this stuff, I often say things that offend people, not meaning to. Like a comment that no neurotypical person would make to someone other than apparently a VERY close friend, I might say to a practical stranger, not even knowing it is at all inappropriate, until i embarrass myself horribly, scare people away, etc etc.

I have a lover/soulmate/fiance, and so I don't have to deal with the crap of dating anymore (BLESSED BE TO THAT!! !). But friends are so hard too. Social situations are a horrible fear.

HOW do i break the ice? Other than "HI my name is Gram I noticed you were panhandling here is some money for some beer would you like to get a forty ounce that we can all spin and enjoy together whilst talking?" Because that entitles me to provide pitch on booze. Which I don't always have. I can only really bond and make friends over drugs or booze as an icebreaker which is total crap to have to rely only on that as a friendmaker.

AND what about "regular people" in people who are not street kids? HOW THE HELL do i associate with them?? WHAT am i supposed to say?!?!? Any suggestions!?!

Oh I am 19 yrs old incase that helps you know who i am -- do be able to make better suggestions i guess.


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Joined: 18 Apr 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,744
Location: New Zealand

17 Jan 2011, 12:46 am

Welcome to WP!

I can relate to your frustration, but social decorum is crucial in a world such as ours. Social rules are not as complex as you probably imagine, and are mainly put in place for comfort.

"We accept the love we think we deserve."