I haven't even close to being in a relationship yet.

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Dnex
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25 Feb 2011, 9:48 pm

I have no idea where to start either.



hale_bopp
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25 Feb 2011, 10:04 pm

You can start by getting to know people.



Dnex
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25 Feb 2011, 10:30 pm

I'm very paranoid about getting to know people though (especially girls)
People are so confusing



simon_says
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25 Feb 2011, 10:36 pm

There is no other way forward. You need to be where the people are to get hit by a relationship. Practice your chatting skills with women without looking for anything. Once you are ready for more, you'll know. I know it's hard but treat it like any other skill. Put your ego aside and be prepared to take some hits. You'll pick it up after youve tried a few times.



galvatron
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25 Feb 2011, 10:54 pm

I've made plenty of efforts to get to know girls, and the result is that I've been friend zoned by every one of them.



dunbots
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25 Feb 2011, 11:02 pm

I say quit while you're ahead. :D



Last edited by dunbots on 25 Feb 2011, 11:05 pm, edited 1 time in total.

simon_says
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25 Feb 2011, 11:02 pm

Keep trying. Make passes when you feel it's appropriate. You'll probably be wrong a lot if you have AS. :lol: NTs get it wrong too. Unwelcome passes freak out everyone so learn to be funny when you scr*w up. Treat it as a game.

Failing that, double check your standards. Don't be too harsh but be realistic.



Todesking
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26 Feb 2011, 12:07 am

galvatron wrote:
I've made plenty of efforts to get to know girls, and the result is that I've been friend zoned by every one of them.


The Puerto Ricans I worked with use to tell me flirt with every woman you meet do not even pretend to be their friend let them know where you are coming from. You ask one hundred of them out at least one or two will say yes. I had waitresses ask me out because I was good with their kids they use to want to see me when they came in for their checks. The waitresses knew me for over five years also they knew I lived with my parents and had a low paying job but was really nice. Another thing they knew was I did not drink, beat women, stayed at home, or would not cheat on them like their previous boyfriends did I was considered stable enough help raise their kids I guess so they gave me chance. I always told them I did not like to be touched so I said no that and my co-workers were teasing me because the single moms were always asking me out. My co-workers would say you knew a waitresses hit rock bottom because they were willing let me pick them up. I was afraid what co-workers would say if I said yes so I never did. I still kick myself in the rear end now that I am 40 and alone. Trust me I can say its something you do not want to be.

You should get a job at a resteraunt or supermarket there are plenty of women who work at those places. When the co-workers ask you to go out with them go. Everytime I was asked out it was when we all went out together. :wink:


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Megz
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26 Feb 2011, 1:21 am

I'm having similar issues. And it didn't really bother me until yesterday when I went to they movies with my two best friends (who have been dating for 6 years), whenever there was a scary part they had someone to hold on to. And it just made me feel really alone. Idk why that particular situation did, but now I'm realizing the "strong independent young woman" thing is getting old, I want a snuggle buddy. For the first time in my life I actually want physical contact with another person. I guess since I live alone now so I'm around people a lot less. But I realized my best guy friend (the one who's dating my other best friend) is my only guy friend at my college. I have guy friends/potential boyfriends back where I went to high school, but that doesn't do me any good here.



DCxMagus
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26 Feb 2011, 2:41 am

"Hi my names ____________, my friend and I here were trying to figure out what your interest were"

that usually starts up a good conversation.

Your gonna be blown off every once in a while just roll with the punches and move on to someone else.



Dnex
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26 Feb 2011, 4:59 pm

Thanks for the advice guys, one of my main problems though is I even really know any girls that I could even call "friends", much less have conversations with.



Moog
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26 Feb 2011, 5:00 pm

Dnex wrote:
I'm very paranoid about getting to know people though (especially girls)
People are so confusing


Learn to be okay with feeling confused.


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Dnex
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26 Feb 2011, 5:18 pm

Moog wrote:
Dnex wrote:
I'm very paranoid about getting to know people though (especially girls)
People are so confusing


Learn to be okay with feeling confused.

I'm confused all of the time pretty much, so I'm pretty much okay with it most of the time.



Moog
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26 Feb 2011, 5:25 pm

Dnex wrote:
Moog wrote:
Dnex wrote:
I'm very paranoid about getting to know people though (especially girls)
People are so confusing


Learn to be okay with feeling confused.

I'm confused all of the time pretty much, so I'm pretty much okay with it most of the time.


Bonus


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Kaybee
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26 Feb 2011, 7:06 pm

DCxMagus wrote:
"Hi my names ____________, my friend and I here were trying to figure out what your interest were"


I think this sounds really weird. :?


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Todesking
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26 Feb 2011, 8:00 pm

Dnex wrote:
Thanks for the advice guys, one of my main problems though is I even really know any girls that I could even call "friends", much less have conversations with.


Get a part time job at a resteraunt or anyother place that has a lot of women working there. Three to four hours a day will put a little extra cash in your pocket and not to mention getting to meet women you might not have been able to meet before. My suggestion if you go with partime work at a resteraunt go after the women who are working their way thru college. :wink:


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