Are you currently in a long term romantic relationship?

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Are you in a long term romantic relationship… and do you have boy-parts or girl-parts?

I’m just curious to see if there is a difference between our male and female members regarding being in romantic relationships. Such a poll has been suggested many times in the “who has it worse” threads, but I hope this thread doesn’t go in that direction.

There is a LOT more to life than relationship status. I just want to know if one sex is more successful in getting into relationships, statistically.

I understand that simply being in a relationship doesn’t mean it’s: good, not abusive, or healthy… no need to state the obvious there, or read more into my question.

Thanks,

j0sh

I have been with my husband for three years.

I'm sure he's a very lucky guy.

I have been in a committed, exclusive relationship with my significant other for over eight years. We have lived together for over six.

I've managed to stay in my relationship for nearly 3 years. It's difficult and exhausting. I care for him greatly but the pressure of maintaining the relationship can make me physically sick. But he stays and I stay and I genuinely enjoy him when he's not getting on my hypersensitive little nerves.

But thats just me

I'm female, almost certain that I am ASD (but not yet diagnosed) and have been with my husband for 17 years - living together for 16 years, married for 9 years. We have no children.

He is my first and only relationship. We met while I was studying Engineering (he was on the course), started our relationship through online chat (in the very early days) across a computer classroom, and he said very early on that the reason he liked being with me was because I don't talk too much.

We have our ups and downs and it can be particularly difficult when I'm struggling with (suspected) ASD stuff because I tend to withdraw from him, but he is patient and knows that eventually I'll come out of it and by my "normal" self.

He probably has some mild ASD traits, but is very social, and these traits don't bother him. I have no idea why he stays with me. But in the words of AshRoswell:

He's a lovely, gentle, kind, patient, genuine man who seems to love me and all my "quirks". I know I am very lucky.

Last edited by YellowBanana on 09 Mar 2011, 3:41 pm, edited 1 time in total.

He is and never had a girlfriend before nor ever had sex. He has even attempted suicide like serveral times before we met but someone always came home before he could do it. Now he is the happiest guy. I was lucky he never did it or else I would have never met him and had this baby.

It's cool how those things seem to work out. In all honesty, I probably would have killed myself if I hadn't found a really good friend in my mid twenties. He's moved on (isn't interested in being friends anymore), but I'm still thankful for the years we were close.

I've only had one romantic relationship. It was years before I learned about AS and things didn't go well. My partner went from "we just met stage" to "I want to be around you 24/7 stage" in less than a week. Having never been in any romantic relationship, it was too much for me.

Sensory and anxiety issues also played a roll. I sent my partner home at 3 am on the night of our first sleep-over. I had never slept in the same bed as someone else, couldn't sleep with someone there, and ended up freaking out. I also forced him to take a shower once because the cologne he was wearing was making me sick. "OMG, what is that smell... please go shower."

I remember thinking "OMG, what is wrong with me... this is what I've wanted for so long, but this is freaking me out" back then. I wished I had known about AS back then; I probably would have been able to manage better.

Last edited by j0sh on 09 Mar 2011, 4:01 pm, edited 1 time in total.

two years and going stronger every day.

5 years married; met when we were 11 and best friends ever since.

Going on 9 years with my husband.

I hope some people who are feeling depressed and suicidal can see this. Things do get better. This is evidence. I bet if somebody had told him "three years from now you will be a happy husband and father" he would have cursed them for lying. But here he is, living a life with you and that cute son in your avatar which he probably never thought was possible before he met you.

I've been with my girlfriend for four years, I never expected it to work out so long. I thought about ending it many times because I thought I couldn't keep it up any longer it's a lot of work, but now we have managed to find a way to make it work better, it's still a lot of energy but I think the good balances out the bad, and we share a lot of the same interests so I'm never bored with her.

We honesty both thought we'd be alone until we died, I'm lucky I found her when I did as she told me she was considering suicide very often before we met.

I've been with my boyfriend for over 2 years. Neither of us were really looking for a relationship but somehow it works, probably because we can both be fairly antisocial.

Married for 21 years. It is a struggle. I know that, without her, I'd likely degenerate into a very unhealthy lifestyle. Despite this, I constantly resent the things she forces me to do (such as leaving the house on a regular basis). Without her, I'd arrange it so I could stay at home for months at a time, preferably in the dark, with whatever video game was my current obsession.

I am not diagnosed, and neither of us sees the point of it. Having a diagnosis wouldn't change who I am (and who I am not). I don't believe that a diagnosis gives you a free pass to do things that wouldn't be tolerated otherwise. I am responsible for who I am and what I do. Having a reason for why doesn't change that fact (in my opinion).

I think your stats will get skewed as people will tend to answer who are in a relationship.

Im not in a relationship.