Page 1 of 1 [ 9 posts ] 

Angnix
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 1 Nov 2007
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,243
Location: Michigan

13 Mar 2011, 12:13 pm

As I keep on saying, I don't know if I have an ASD, but I hate it when people touch me and I wonder when it is okay to touch people.

Basically, what I have observed is if you are good friends with someone, it is okay to touch them lightly on the shoulder to reassure them, or to push them slightly when just joking around. But I don't know at all when it is okay to do this. It might be one of the reason why I make acquaintances and not friends, maybe along with the fact I tend to take joking around seriously.

It seems when I joke, I take it too far and people don't like it, but others get away with saying pretty darn mean things to their friends.


_________________
Crazy Bird Lady!! !
Also likes Pokemon

Avatar: A Shiny from the new Pokemon Pearl remake, Shiny Chatot... I named him TaterTot...

FINALLY diagnosed with ASD 2/6/2020


ruveyn
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Sep 2008
Age: 87
Gender: Male
Posts: 31,502
Location: New Jersey

13 Mar 2011, 12:24 pm

Angnix wrote:
As I keep on saying, I don't know if I have an ASD, but I hate it when people touch me and I wonder when it is okay to touch people.

.


Touching strangers is considered impolite. Hugging one's kids or nephews/neices is necessary and not touching one's spouse is an exercise in futility.

ruveyn



StuartN
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Jan 2010
Age: 60
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,569

15 Mar 2011, 5:14 am

Angnix wrote:
As I keep on saying, I don't know if I have an ASD, but I hate it when people touch me and I wonder when it is okay to touch people.

Basically, what I have observed is if you are good friends with someone, it is okay to touch them lightly on the shoulder to reassure them, or to push them slightly when just joking around. But I don't know at all when it is okay to do this.


Are you asking in order to understand how to react to being touched, or to learn how to touch other people?

As far as touching other people, then just do not do it if you have no desire to do it. I don't think other people require it for social communication and I don't think attempting to mimic this behaviour helps to fit in (especially if you get it wrong). If you DO want to touch other people, that really is a matter of learning when and how it is appropriate - I would have no problem at all in asking people direct questions about touching them.



League_Girl
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Feb 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 27,205
Location: Pacific Northwest

15 Mar 2011, 9:44 am

I never touch people.



b9
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Aug 2008
Age: 52
Gender: Male
Posts: 12,003
Location: australia

15 Mar 2011, 10:06 am

i never touch anyone either. whenever i have touched people in the past, problems concerning their ideas always arose. tammy is an exception. i love to touch her.



kfisherx
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 3 Nov 2010
Age: 60
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,192

15 Mar 2011, 10:15 am

League_Girl wrote:
I never touch people.


^^THIS^^

Who said that you have to touch people? Outside of my children, I rarely ever touch anyone.



draelynn
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 24 Jan 2011
Age: 55
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,304
Location: SE Pennsylvania

15 Mar 2011, 10:25 am

NOT touchy feely - much to the dismay of my husband... :(



Xenia
Raven
Raven

User avatar

Joined: 7 Mar 2011
Age: 44
Gender: Female
Posts: 115

15 Mar 2011, 10:42 am

I hug my children a lot but, as with the previous poster, that' about it, which my husband also isn't so happy about!

My long term family and friends live far away and when they visit it is a big occasion so when they leave everyone hugs each other, I stand back and always get grabbed by someone who thinks it is funny to force me into a hug while I pull away despite knowing full well I don't like it.

Then again I do like the occasional touch on the shoulder or arm but from people I am less close to but like, otherwise I hate it.



blackcat
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 16 Nov 2006
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,142
Location: 10 miles south of sanity.

15 Mar 2011, 7:51 pm

I don't really like to be touched...at all. I allow it, but I don't enjoy it. People hug me and I take it.


_________________
I think I know. I don't think I know. I don't think I think I know. I don't think I think.