How is or was your high school social life?

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dragonsanddemons
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16 Jul 2018, 7:14 pm

No social life, really. I went to a different high school than the people I went to elementary school and junior high with, so I didn't really know anyone, no one bothered to get to know me, and goodness knows I didn't have the courage or confidence to take the first steps on my own. There were a few classes where I answered questions a lot and the teachers really liked me because I was quiet and a good student, but otherwise, I was pretty much invisible, and have been ever since, to the point that I much prefer it this way now - I really don't want to have to handle a social life on top of everything else I'm dealing with. I was recovering from my first round of major depression (which lasted most of junior high) at the time, too.

For me, college wasn't a whole lot better, because living in a dorm, even when I managed not to get a roommate (had one my first year, it wreaked havoc with my mental health, solely because I'm not suited to living in such close quarters with others, nothing whatsoever to do with my roommate personally), it was a sensory nightmare, and I was also dealing with the effects of the aforementioned first year - and I was very surprised that people in the classes didn't act a whole lot better than people in my high school classes, I was expecting them to be more quiet and studious since they'd paid to be there and all.


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UncannyDanny
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16 Jul 2018, 7:23 pm

I dunno…. I guess you can say that when I was in high school , I've hung out with the wrong kinds of kids 90% of the time. And by "wrong kids", I meant like the ones who are a dime-a-dozen morons who were into Teen Partying, underaged sex, and getting into drugs and smoking. (Even though I wasn't really into those things, I kind of was a horrible judge of character back then. Also, the councilor I REALLY hated now tells me to be more sociable by hanging out with those people [What planet is he from exactly?]) The other 10% was either hanging out with a really few close friends with things in common (anime, Pokémon, etc.), or being by myself.

I wish I'd saw it then, wishing that I would've hung out with the "right" kinds of folks. :oops: :(

This is pretty much how my life was in high school:
Image


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Sam31
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17 Jul 2018, 5:47 pm

Primary school.... AMAZING!! !

I loved every second of it. I could be myself. At that age, from what I experienced, kids don't care how you come across, it's about similar interests. Kids who liked the same sports team, pogs, football stickers, clothes, music, etc happened to group together. It was less about personality, social skills or abilities and all about hobbies.

High school....Meh. I went to a high school away from all my primary school friends (in the countryside, mum made that choice for me) and it was hell. Hated every second of it. I was the only kid from my primary school who went there. No longer was it about people with similar interests grouping together, but was all about social skills and yes, I sucked.

The worst part of this, in year 7, people wanted to get to know me including some girls who went on to be the school hotties. Yet Asperger's made it terrible. I couldn't socialise and suddenly found myself hanging with the childish nappy kids, behaving like an infant. Messing around and being stupid was much easier afterall than getting into "normal" social conversation. This developed me a reputation for being a childish prat which prevented me having any real friendships.

I remember by year 9 asking 1 of my year's hotties out who tried talking to me in year 7. My supposed master plan was so funny, you will all laugh massively.

I bought a pig ornament (it looked like a cute pig.... I guess it wasn't ideal), it had a hole in the bottom. I wrote the question on a note and put it through the hole in the bottom.... I wasn't thinking at the time but what can be worse than pulling a note out a pigs bum? Surprisingly though she told me she would have said yes if I wasn't such an immature idiot. Dang!! !!

Regret and cringe. By years 10 and 11, I really couldn't be bothered. Hated it so much due to health stuff, I bunked off as much as I could. Hung around with people who bigged up smoking, drinking and weed. I was lead astray and so on.


That's another ridiculous thing about high school. With having aspergers I called this kid call josh "joshi" (Pronounced Josh-E).... As in Yoshi from Super Mario, who is a cool character. I believed it was a good conversation starter. Yet after saying it, that guy went to the head of year saying I was bullying him by saying it. I got in serious trouble.



jimmy m
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17 Jul 2018, 6:11 pm

In Junior High I was bullied continuously for 3 years. That is probably an understatement, I was physically and mentally assaulted every day at school by gangs of boys. At the school graduation party I was voted "Least Likely to Succeed". After that High School was a breeze. I didn't have much of a social life. I had one good friend and I suspect he was also an Aspie. I liked High School. I went from a nobody into a nerd. [But the term "nerd" didn't exist in those days.] At my 50th year class reunion what they remembered about me was "that I was a math genius and they wondered what ever became of me."



ladyelaine
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18 Jul 2018, 5:53 pm

My high school social life was basically non existent. I had only one good friend at school. Everyone else thought I was weird and made fun of me behind my back. I eat lunch by myself unless my friend had the same lunch as me, then I ate with her. We had a few other people we tried to be friends with but they ditched us for popular people.



UncannyDanny
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19 Jul 2018, 1:44 pm

^What, your few other friends ditched you, and have converted into those dime-a-dozen morons?! :o That is just plain wrong! Those are NOT real friends!


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19 Jul 2018, 11:06 pm

High school is weird for me. It didnt fully work out for me. I am in a least restrictive environment right now. For me that means that I have one regular class a semester and the other 3 are special education. I have meltdowns occasionally and I can be disruptive. It works for me. I do not have many friends. A lot of people think I am a bit weird and that I talk weirdly and dress weirdly. I like the way I am. I have a couple of friends. My one friend is 21 and the other is 19. They accept me for my differences.


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Joe90
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20 Jul 2018, 12:20 pm

Mine was crap and embarrassing.

(Age 11-12)
First year of high school was socially easy, and so I was still as accepted by my classmates like I was in primary school, although one or two started to act a little bitchy just because.

(Age 12-13)
I wasn't sure who to hang out with at this stage. My classmates started rejecting me but I had on-off friendships. I also had my first crush on a boy in my class, which didn't turn out too well.

(Age 13-14)
This was when I was the loneliest I had ever been in my whole life, plus this was the worst year of my school life. I got a bout of depression which made me do strange things like trying to make new friends by following them around and creeping them out. Plus I got obsessions with older men, that socially isolated me from the friends I could have had, because I wouldn't talk about anything else but these men who they obviously didn't know.

(Age 14-15)
In this school year they mixed our classes up, so we were classed by intelligence. I obviously was in the lowest classes, so that gave me a chance to mix with other kids with low grades too. I did meet a few people who either had learning difficulties or were slightly social outcasts (probably undiagnosed Aspies), so I sort of found myself a small group of friends. I even hung out with one or two of them after school sometimes.

(Age 15-16)
Unfortunately the small group I thought were my new friends turned out to be bitchy and kind of bullied me by playing mind games. It was an on and off thing all year with complicated arguments. It didn't do much good for anyone involved. But, this time, they were the problem, not me. But I stuck with them because I didn't want to go looking for new friends again. I coped with it by pretending I was in a TV drama sitcom.

(Age 16-17)
This was the best school year of my life because you wasn't under legal obligation to stay on at school. I chose to, and one of the other 'outcasts' did too, while the rest left. So we both became best friends and done all the things best friends do.

So, yeah, my social life through high school was a bit of a rollercoaster.


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superaliengirl
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25 Jul 2018, 9:42 am

High school (my last 4 years of studying) was good as I was no longer bullied.
I made friends on the first day but quickly slipped away from them too. They were of course very social NTs and they were nice to me and considered me a friend of theirs but with time they stopped inviting me to things after school but they would talk about what they'd done together on the weekend on breaks and at lunch which made me feel very secluded. I still liked them a lot though so I stopped hanging out with them as to not bother them because that's what I felt like I was doing even though they treated me like a friend at least at school. I also dated a pretty popular guy for a while in high school (my first ever relationship) but that was a disaster.



Slug on a Bike
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25 Jul 2018, 9:52 am

My whole life.

1 or less friends
at a time.



Fnord
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25 Jul 2018, 9:52 am

user1001 wrote:
How is or was your high school social life?
Non-existent. No friends, no dates, no social life at all.

I take that back ... does getting beat up on a daily basis while the teachers and administrators ignore your pleas, the bruises on your face, and the blood on your clothes count as a "social life"?

No, I'm not claiming victimhood here ... I see myself as a survivor instead.

High school was four years of social Hell.


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25 Jul 2018, 11:07 am

My ASD traits seemed to be in a sort of remission when I was in high school. I attribute that only to being a hormone with toes at the time and regularly imbibing in substances that threw my inhibitions and social fears aside.

In a word, my social life was still pretty dismal in HS and I absolutely hated school. The small group of misfit friends I hung out with went to two different HS in town. The only "friend" I had at my HS was my girlfriend at the time. She was more active and popular. At the beginning of my senior year, I found out that you could actually graduate at the end of the first half of the year if you had enough credits, which I did. I found this out from a girl in my physics class who also ran with the same overall group of misfits (punks and new wavers) that I did. She was so excited to graduate early as she hated school as well.

I was elated to hear that such a thing was possible. My early ticket to freedom. Could it be?? After class I flew to my girlfriend, beaming at the good news..............It was met with a frown. She didn't want to graduate early nor did she want me to graduate early. I caved. I stayed for the whole school year.

On the last day of school I don't think my feet touched the ground the entire day. Along with my wedding day (second one, the wedding that actually meant something), birth of kids, the last day of HS was truly one of THE happiest days of my life. I walked the halls between classes almost as if it was in slow motion. Turning my head I saw some cheerleaders sobbing on each other's shoulders with mascara starting to drip from their eyes. I was dumbfounded that they were actually sad to leave.

Yes, I hated institutional learning. It was imprisoning.

Oh, and the girlfriend that I stayed in school for? We were going to go to different universities in different states that fall. On the advice of one of her girlfriends, my girlfriend broke up with me that summer.


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guitarman2010
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28 Jul 2018, 9:02 am

I was a social outcast but had a small group I hung around with during my high school years. I despised high school because of not only the social difficulties but also the fact that my mother worked at the high school I went to.....talk about being embarrassed! It wasn't 100% bad though as I thought because it got me out of a couple behavioral incidents I got myself into like fights and such.

Because my low self-esteem and such, I took to abusing alcohol and drugs every chance I could to escape my emotional pain. I was placed on legal amphetamines (Ritalin and Adderal) at age 12 and was on them through high school until my senior year where they found I was abusing them. The fact I was on them in the first place made me feel "less than" and I convinced myself I was broken and needed a pill to fix me. Yeah, high school was like a living hell for me lol.....


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Katie0405
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30 Jul 2018, 12:45 am

I came from a high school with a rigorous application process. Only 240 students (out of thousands) can enroll in the school, depending on their entrance school scores. Hence, most students here are very serious and competitive. Let's not forget about most of them being nerds! Because of this, I think I only had a few friends that really matched my interest and lifestyle. A lot of students here are more focused on getting high grades than making long-lasting friendships.



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05 Aug 2018, 2:56 pm

I started of not having much friends then i started to act like a very out going and social girl who likes to joke a lot. I made a lot of friends like that but got bored and fell into depression. After that i started to miss my own self and regressed to my old self.