Weird things you've said to others

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I was just thinking about some things I've said to people.

One time when I was younger I was walking with my trombone case. I never move my arms usually but when I have someone in one I move the other and I look mostly like others. I was walking home with a classmate (really she was just walking the same way and wouldn't go away) and she asked me why I was moving my arm.

My reply was "because I have something in my hand.".

I say so man weird things I can't even remember

I don't know if this is actually weird but it is according to my family.

"I won't eat lamb because it's a baby animal."

Then my brother replied "You're a freak."

Oh, too many. Ask my brother's girlfriend, she'll tell you - not sexual things, just odd and bizarre statements I come out with.

"Did you know you have spots on your back" to my bro's girlfriend, she was wearing a backless dress.

My aunt visited me and my mum today, I didn't say anything to her till they went over to the computer to look at a holiday bookingas and I asked "Do you like travis?" and she said yes so I decided I liked her.

Just two weeks ago, I said to a man who goes to my clubhouse who speaks with a German accent, "You've got quite the accent. I've never realized how much of an accent you have."

He said to me, "You've quite the accent as well."

Sometimes I say odd things intentionally, just to see the reactions of shock or puzzlement, or to make people laugh. Other times, I don't realize that what I said was in any way unusual until someone gets offended by it.

I say so many weird things to people you'd need several volumes of books to keep track of them all.

I remember saying to someone that I do weird things if I'm alone too long. She gave me a really odd look and quit talking to me. I just meant that I didn't have other people to observe to know how to behave in public, not that I divined the future from sheep guts or something.

One time, my best friend and I were asking the staff in the clubhouse kitchen if they'd like to pop a pea.

i keep saying things like humans are weird or humans just screw everything up- things along those lines that make it sound like im not a human...

We're not humans, we're X-Men.

My mate - "Yeah yeah, don't get your knickers in a knot."
Me - "That's a stupid expression. It's a physical impossibility when you really think about it, unless you take off your knickers, physically tie them in a knot and then put them back on. Why would you do that? What does that even mean?"

She didn't say anything but shake her head. I suppose she's accustomed to me complaining about the sheer stupidity of many common expressions. It just annoys me when people parrot these stupid expressions without thinking about what they're saying, and say what they mean instead of just repeating these nonsensical terms.

Oh god, I can come up with the weirdest things to totally blow people's minds :L

My stepdad: "If you don't tidy your room today I'm going to smack you silly and ground you forever (Jokingly... I think :L)

Then I replied- "Well, I'm going hack your limbs off, feed them to the dog and then make the dog regurgitate them into the river. I will then throw you in a giant vat of nuclear waste, which will disintegrate your skin and your bones, but I will use my superpowers to dive in and save your repulsive remains, which I will then strap to a frisbee... and throw to Jupiter."

That shut him up.

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Aspie 172/200 Undiagnosed, but pretty sure I have it.
'Wit beyond measure is man's greatest treasure.'