Have you experienced this?

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Have you noticed that when you are feeling relaxed and not stressed and try and communicate with people that is when people accuse you of behaving at your most ecentricly. i am shocked when i feel stressed and under pressure that people think i am a very pleasent guy who is nice to be around. i find when i am really laid back that is when people say negative things to me about my behaviour.

i remmember as well reading old school records at times when i was very stressed at school with work and others things that teachers described me as laid back and in control........ litteraly when i am not feeling angry and talk to my brother or my parents they say things like "are you feeling okay" "are you mentally ill" "Do you need some water?" . I am like thinking what are they on about i feel absolutely fine. It might have something to with not realising sometimes how our behaviour comes across to NTs and it can be very fustrating when they accuse us of behaving in a certain way when we are just trying to do our own buissness and be pleasent.

have you experienced things like this?

Is it something to with our 'relaxed' faces looking angry? I feel my aspie behaviour comes out more when i feel chilled out and happy just by how react to me in my enviorment.

Yes. It's always been like that for me. It's not hard to understand why this happens. Trying to create a socially adjusted persona pleases people but exhausts you and stresses you out. Being yourself relaxes you but displeases people except for those who are close to you, know you well and appreciate you.

Its a very annoying situation because just to get acceptance by people we have to be stressed out all the time.

If you gain acceptance by pretending to be something you're not, it's not you that is being accepted, though. It's meaningless.

The "weird" things you do, try to figure out if they are actually hurtful or merely not in line with some arbitrary social code. If they are actually hurtful, it would be good to try and change your behaviors, otherwise not.

I have noticed something similar. In some cases I am feeling bad about the situation I am in, and I feel like it is clear to see for others that I do not feel OK or motivated. But no one seems to notice it. Until I start to feel better, I have more motivation to do my work, and suddenly people start to ask questions about why I am no longer motivated, and start suggesting me to find some other thing to do, and suggest it may be better to quit.

Why is this? It happened it several situations. People seem to act the opposite of what seems appropriate in that situation.

I lose my s#!+ in situations others thrive in, yet when it hits the fan i feel no real sense of stress. I am able to focus on what needs to be accomplished (and forget other people actually can work to the same end that i pusue). Like if every one else is loosing thier $#!+ then i really dont have to worry, thier doing it for me

Yes, I experience this.

There is nothing worse than people telling me "You look really well" or "You're doing really well" when I feel like absolute crap and am on the verge of meltdown/shutdown. But I think they are saying it genuinely ... that is I think they really mean it, they're not just saying it because they think they're being helpful (I could be wrong, I'm not that good at picking up intention).

And I often get "are you feeling OK?" or "You're looking rather pale" when I feel just fine and relaxed and am just kind of zoned out. Which is equally annoying. Yes, I'm OK. Thanks. Now bugger off and let me continue to be OK!! !