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how do people feel about going Dutch,

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ValentineWiggin
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21 May 2011, 8:02 am

Sowlowsolo wrote:

Fighting for womans rights (not me personally) to me hasn't done woman that many favours. All it has done is left woman with the full list of responsibilities/duties she had before and added to these half (if not more) of the mans role! But that's all a different subject really.



I dunno...I kinda like being able to have a job...drive a car...get an education...own property...control my reproduction...not be raped...not be beaten by my husband...VOTE...open a bank account...



b9
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21 May 2011, 10:17 am

if i went (became) "dutch", then i would be horrified at the ease with which my previously trusted "bedrock" based genes were re-arrangeable. if i went "dutch", what else could i become? an ant?



jrjones9933
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21 May 2011, 10:39 am

b9 wrote:
if i went (became) "dutch", then i would be horrified at the ease with which my previously trusted "bedrock" based genes were re-arrangeable. if i went "dutch", what else could i become? an ant?


Kafka's The Metamorphosis rewritten with a change in nationality rather than species?

Maybe that's how a few of us managed to grow up egalitarian, socially liberal, un-prudish, and cooperatively-minded in Texas!


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puddingmouse
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21 May 2011, 10:53 am

I've never done it differently.

I honestly don't know why having a vagina means I have to have my food paid for me, even in the name of 'romance'. I'd rather have someone who's going to dance with me than someone who buys me things. *soppy

EDIT: I don't care how badly they dance, either!


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sterfry
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22 May 2011, 1:02 am

ValentineWiggin wrote:
sterfry wrote:
What about cooking Ramen for a girl and asking her for a nickel to cover her half? That would be classy.


Sounds like my kinda guy. 8)


Then may I have the pleasure of sprinkling a packet of powdered shrimp or chicken flavoring on your noodles? And for dessert please help yourself to some of the no calorie sweetener packets I nabbed from the coffee shop. :wink:



Realistically though, if things were reversed and the girl payed for the guy it would be extremely emasculating so I can see how an independent woman might be offended. I think dutch is the way to go, but only if the guy offers to pay first and then the girl insists on splitting the check. The offer is what counts.



ValentineWiggin
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22 May 2011, 9:05 am

sterfry wrote:
ValentineWiggin wrote:
sterfry wrote:
What about cooking Ramen for a girl and asking her for a nickel to cover her half? That would be classy.


Sounds like my kinda guy. 8)


Then may I have the pleasure of sprinkling a packet of powdered shrimp or chicken flavoring on your noodles? And for dessert please help yourself to some of the no calorie sweetener packets I nabbed from the coffee shop. :wink:



Realistically though, if things were reversed and the girl payed for the guy it would be extremely emasculating so I can see how an independent woman might be offended. I think dutch is the way to go, but only if the guy offers to pay first and then the girl insists on splitting the check. The offer is what counts.


I was reading some doubly-sexist mag website (Cosmo? I'm ashamed.) and one of the "horror" stories submitted involved a guy on a first date with a girl whipping out a coupon when it came time to pick up the check- all the responders were absolutely horrified, and gave the woman a way to go for never seeing him again.

Meanwhile, I'm thinking: if I ever meet a guy like that, I think I'll marry him. :D



Jonsi
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22 May 2011, 9:18 am

I usually pay for both of us. Doesn't matter who asks. It's just the polite thing to do for me.



sterfry
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22 May 2011, 11:08 pm

The coupon thing is definitely a no-no. Unless of course you covertly give the waiter the coupon when you sneak off to the bathroom.

I think it might be ok if you mentioned while asking for the date though as in, "I have a coupon for this restaurant I've been wanting to try out. Care to join me?"



ValentineWiggin
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23 May 2011, 1:49 am

sterfry wrote:
The coupon thing is definitely a no-no. Unless of course you covertly give the waiter the coupon when you sneak off to the bathroom.

I think it might be ok if you mentioned while asking for the date though as in, "I have a coupon for this restaurant I've been wanting to try out. Care to join me?"


I think it's smart, and shows a man's frugal. 8)



CrinklyCrustacean
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23 May 2011, 3:32 am

jrjones9933 wrote:
b9 wrote:
if i went (became) "dutch", then i would be horrified at the ease with which my previously trusted "bedrock" based genes were re-arrangeable. if i went "dutch", what else could i become? an ant?


Kafka's The Metamorphosis rewritten with a change in nationality rather than species?

Maybe that's how a few of us managed to grow up egalitarian, socially liberal, un-prudish, and cooperatively-minded in Texas!

:lol: :lol: :lol:



cdfox7
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23 May 2011, 6:24 am

jrjones9933 wrote:
b9 wrote:
if i went (became) "dutch", then i would be horrified at the ease with which my previously trusted "bedrock" based genes were re-arrangeable. if i went "dutch", what else could i become? an ant?


Kafka's The Metamorphosis rewritten with a change in nationality rather than species?

Maybe that's how a few of us managed to grow up egalitarian, socially liberal, un-prudish, and cooperatively-minded in Texas!


Lets be Kafkaesque about that it beats being an Ein Hungerkünstler :lol:



shine_on
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29 May 2011, 9:05 am

I hate the whole '50-50' thing. If a man invites me out to lunch/dinner/for coffee etc I would like him to pay because I see it as a a gift. At other times I do the same for him. Keeping track of whose 'turn' it is defeats the purpose (in my opinion) which is to show your love by giving generously.