Can you have social anxiety with certain groups only?

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I don't seem to have any social anxiety with people 18-60. I have a bit more with seniors. I have a bit with little kids as well. However, I have EXTREME social anxiety with my peers. Especially NT boys. This is not much of an issue because I tend to be uninterested in what my peers are interested in anyway. I never had this before Grade 8. When I was kid, I didn't interact poorly with teenagers. All my babysitters were teenagers and liked them fine.

Anyone know about this?

I'd say it's perfectly possible, mainly because I get that too. I have trouble with people my own age, particularly those who are supposed to be my peer group. I also got along much better with people who were significantly older or younger than me. I think the anxiety started when I was in 4th or 5th grade and just never really improved all that much.

Did you have a history of being bullied or socially excluded? Bad memories associated with people in your own age group?

I think all of that could easily contribute to social anxiety.

I like this topic.
I also want to know what other people think.

I have most anxiety with really good-looking women. I can't look at them for more than a second. I feel like I'm going to go "blind". I think it's due to extreme emotional response. Age isn't a major factor. I guess I might be slightly more anxious around the very old and young because they are harder to read, so I'm not sure how I'm supposed to act or what to talk about. Is it okay to swear/talk dirty, etc? I'm never sure exactly at what age certain stuff/topics like sex can be discussed.

I get a ton of anxiety around harsh personalities...people who will make snap judgements about you with no effort to understand you and then complain or pick at everything you do wrong. These people are obsessed with power and excluding people who are different...and being eager to please, I find I can never make them happy. There were a ton of these people in my former workplaces.

Once bitten twice shy.

Mainstream NT society, and its head nodding minions, gives me the willies

I like being around some musicians, artists, neurodiverse people.

I hate being around team sport players like baseballers, cricket players and footballers. Far too NT for me.

I'd say it's definitely possible to have more anxiety around some people than others. I don't have it more around a certain group (at least not one I can identify), but I am definitely more anxious in some social situations than others.

Not really. However, I was put in a class where everyone was in cliques in Grade 8. I was excluded then. The girl that "bullies" in my school is a person that is extremely hard to get along with; almost everyone has trouble getting along with her.

Funny how I felt that you were exactly like this description back when I've met you in November.

That said, I have no social anxiety whatsoever nowadays. I can freely converse with people I have just met. I often start tensing up around someone once I have gotten to know them, because I begin to feel like they are not being upfront enough with me and are making blind judgements about my behaviour. That's what throws me off. I start realizing that once people become less responsive to what I have to say, so the conversation does not progress without me having to constantly prod it.

Women, because I've never gotten along with them, had bad relationship with my mother along with every other female in my life, also with girl-hate and the complexity of female relationships it's all just too scary for me to even attempt to approach. I don't know how to interact with them and it seems whenever I'm with women I'm missing something vital to how they interact with each other...and they can sense it...

Younger people are also an issue for me - children are difficult as I don't know how to talk to them due to age-appropriate language (e.g. you can't talk baby-talk to a 13 year old, but what language do you use at what ages), but students are a particular problem. It seems despite there only being a few years difference between us, students seem to see me as more grown-up than them. I'm no longer part of the youth culture so no longer relivant to them, they seem to either dismiss me or expect me to act like a grown-up - I don't act immature, but I still don't consider people of my age as being grown-up. I also feel sad that I didn't get to be a student, and due to health problems my intelligence has lessened, so I feel inferior to those who may have gotten to be students.

I'm good with most men around the ages of 20-40, I'm okay with old people, and somehow I seem to be able to get on well with charvers.

when my cycle is at it's worse, i can be around people i don't know and i'm fine...it's my freinds that i feel the most anxiety. i like being around them but sooner or later i fold and have 2 leave.

Interesting...I can see that, too. Ironically, I actually thought you definitely belonged in the category I described until I discovered how you operated. It was because you aren't in tune with social context and nuance as much as I am, so I took things that you said and did far too personally. Just goes to show that all it takes is a little understanding...and self-advocacy...to repair things between two people.

With you, I no longer make blind judgements about your behaviour, but immediately examine it for other possible meanings. I understand the sense of anxiety you have though, because others won't automatically do this and just jump to conclusions, since they do that with everyone else.

I've learned, though, that when I do make an internal judgement around you or people like yourself, that I DO have to speak up about it because you wouldn't know about my judgements otherwise. It's because of this experience with you (and a couple of others) that I have added a new tip to my Educational Strategies session...which is to not take things personally.