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littlelily613
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03 Aug 2011, 9:42 pm

I have to set up an interview to speak to the advisor of the graduate program I wish to pursue in September of 2013. I have to set the interview up within the next month so I can figure out if I will actually qualify for the program before it is too late for me to figure out a Plan B if I do not. Anyway, my question is: when I am emailing her to set up this appointment, once I get the appointment date, should I forewarn her that I have autism and cannot make eye contact. I am already registered in the school with autism, so it is not a big secret I am attempting to hide or anything. The reason I ask is because my counsellor mentioned that, while she understands my not making eye contact (she knows I am autistic, obviously), she said those who do not know likely think I appear sketchy, disinterested, or dishonest, etc. So, do you think I should mention it....or would that just be weird? I don`t want to make a bad impression at this interview though, and I know I will not be able to focus my eyes on her, so I really have no idea WHAT to do! :?


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AspieWolf
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03 Aug 2011, 9:48 pm

If she already knows about your lack of eye contact, then this should not be a problem for you. It might help though if during the interview you offer to talk to her about your condition and tell her about it and ask her if she has any questions or concerns. I think that openness and honesty are the best approaches here. If I were the interviewer, I know that I would certainly appreciate it if the interviewee first broached the subject.

Good luck!


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littlelily613
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03 Aug 2011, 9:54 pm

AspieWolf wrote:
If she already knows about your lack of eye contact, then this should not be a problem for you.


This person I must have a meeting with knows nothing about me, probably not even my name yet. It was a third party who informed me I needed to contact her for an interview. The only people who know are the disability office and my counsellor.

So would you still say wait until the interview or should I briefly mention it prior?

AspieWolf wrote:
Good luck!


Thank you! I am sooo nervous (and sooo bad at interviews!)


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Diagnosed with classic Autism
AQ score= 48
PDD assessment score= 170 (severe PDD)
EQ=8 SQ=93 (Extreme Systemizer)
Alexithymia Quiz=164/185 (high)


oceandrop
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03 Aug 2011, 10:31 pm

Fake eye contact by looking between brows or something. I would focus on the interview and try not to worry so much about your autism. As you know, it's your knowledge, enthusiasm, etc. that need to come through to the interviewer.



oceandrop
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03 Aug 2011, 10:32 pm

I made it through interviews for grad school when I didn't know I had AS. Sometimes ignorance is bliss.



Artros
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04 Aug 2011, 8:25 am

oceandrop wrote:
Fake eye contact by looking between brows or something. I would focus on the interview and try not to worry so much about your autism. As you know, it's your knowledge, enthusiasm, etc. that need to come through to the interviewer.


I manage to make myself do eye contact in interviews (I try to mirror the interviewer's eye contact). It's all very intense but I get away with it. If you can't manage it, do the brow thing. I'm pretty sure eye contact isn't generally the most important thing in a job interview, though. Most people seem to think enthousiasm is. I got my spot because I sat there and started thinking about the ways the program interested me. If you can kind of spin it in your head until it becomes sort of a special interest to you, your enthousiasm will shine through.

I would only mention it if the interviewer mentions something weird you cannot explain without mentioning AS.

Good luck.


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littlelily613
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04 Aug 2011, 11:34 am

I know there is no way I can force myself to make eye contact--I can't even do that with my own parents. But I will try to look at the mouth or something, so I am looking at them but not at their eyes. Yeah, I won't mention it unless I really feel the need to there. I don't want them to be focusing on that during the interview. I am still sooooo terrified though! AAAAAH!


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AQ score= 48
PDD assessment score= 170 (severe PDD)
EQ=8 SQ=93 (Extreme Systemizer)
Alexithymia Quiz=164/185 (high)


Artros
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04 Aug 2011, 1:53 pm

littlelily613 wrote:
I know there is no way I can force myself to make eye contact--I can't even do that with my own parents. But I will try to look at the mouth or something, so I am looking at them but not at their eyes. Yeah, I won't mention it unless I really feel the need to there. I don't want them to be focusing on that during the interview. I am still sooooo terrified though! AAAAAH!


If you're interviewed by a woman, make sure not to focus too low. I've heard that they might think you're looking at their chest if you do that. Forehead may be a better idea in that case.

Also, try to relax before your interview. I have a little stress ball that I use for these occasions. I find it helps me a great deal.


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"Be slow to fall into friendship; but when thou art in, continue firm and constant. " -Socrates
AQ: 40/50
EQ: 17/50
SQ: 72/80 (Extreme Synthesiser)
Aspie test: about 150/200 Aspie, about 40/200 NT