Do dateless men have a right to be picky?

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Do you feel that men who can't get dates have a right to be picky? Do you feel that these men should be thankful for any female attention they get regardless of what the woman looks like?

I ask this because I have been reading the "Looking for a hillbillie(sp) girl" thread. And the guys on that thread have launched a war against fat women over there.

It's not just from reading that thread. There is a man who works in my building who is sixty years old and walks with a cane. He has never been married. And he wants a woman who looks like Tyra Banks. I know no woman of Tyra Banks calibur would want an old crusty, dusty, crippled old man unless she's looking for a sugar daddy.

So what do you all think?

i think if they are as just as ugly as the women they date they have no room to talk

I think that dateless men have no right whatsoever to be picky, save for the fundamental standards, such as "must be human" and "must have all the parts in place", as well as political or religious beliefs they feel very strongly about. (I'm a dateless man myself, by the way.) Even if a man wants someone with similar interests, it shouldn't be a dealbreaker. With the exception of topics like abortion, euthanasia, and religion, you can always find some common ground if you try. As far as looks and weight go, I simply have no right to be picky, and I fully accept it.

I completely agree, and I feel this way about myself. I'm now in the process of looking for a girlfriend, mainly via the dating sites. There have been numerous theories that the human species is no different than the animals: only the fittest (i.e. best looking) will be able to reproduce. So I do the opposite of what the NT men do: I send messages to the least attractive women on the sites. I jokingly call it "the unnatural selection". How do you like that, Charles Darwin?

I feel anyone's right is anyone's way they want to be. You have a right to be as picky or not as picky as you want, but if you are picky, you must live with the consequences. That being said, if no one passes your rigorous standards, then you probably won't get a lot of dates. Conversely, if you are picky about others, then you should also be picky and meticulous about yourself (appearance, hygiene etc); those all lead to getting more dates and moving your way up the ladder.

A bit of hygiene, and a workout goes a long way. As a man, you really don't have to be especially outgoing to get dates. It helps out quite a bit, but you can still manage to date females who come to you.

Any woman who wanted to date me would have to be mad, and why should I date a lunatic?


Anyway, what am I going to do with a "date" when I've got one?
Now a friend, on the other hand...

Try have a child with that girl, you could have some serious mutent kid and thats if you are both at a healthy reproduction age. If you are both over 35 your asking for truble.

Sorry, but that IS the dealbreaker with me. I've met lots of attractive girls, but as soon as I realise that I have nothing in common, my eyes glaze over and I lose interest.

Lol, it's funny, but pretty girls hate that.

You have the right to be picky.
But if you don't have alot of women interested in you it wil ruin your chances though.
Less good looking women tend to get jelouse though.
Sure it's easy to get with them.
But in the end i rather just look good and find someone that fits you.
Unless you wanna get laid fast ofcourse.
Than ugly women are the best choice.

Good looking male have every right to be picky. Good looking men with high IQ have every right to be picky, aspie or not.

I don't think it is meaningful to talk about it in terms of "rights".

I look at it this way: everyone can be as picky as they want, but they should be aware that sometimes this means they will be alone.

No, I'm not going to start a relationship with someone that I'm not attracted to. I mean if you are not attracted to them then obviously they are genetically incompatible to me and I probably wouldn't feel sexually stimulated enough to even bother with sex for the most part, making the other person feel like crap, so therefore it's a stupid idea.

Not everyone hates fat chicks or have exactly the same taste in what they find attractive, or what priorities they have in a partner, everyone can find someone else who is also compatible with them if they actually bothered to look hard enough.

There are generally things that I dont want in a partner, such a tattoos, or smokers, or even a woman who has a dog (I hate dogs, cant deal with them). I would generally rule out any sort of relationship with a women with any of these or other things I dont like.

On the one hand you could say that I'm picky and I should change my way of thinking somehow, but then why should I have to change my beliefs when it's just as easy for the woman to change, say if she is fat, she can exercise, if she is a smoker she can quit, tattoos can be removed if you really want to, plastic surgery if she feels ugly etc, but I wouldn't want someone to have to change so much for me that they might end up resenting me for it or to become someone they aren't.

People are who they are, they make their own decisions and live with their own consequences, if a person wants to remain picky they have to live with the fact they might not get as many dates or might miss out on someone with a great personality or whatever, that's their loss and they can live with it or change it whenever they like.

I'm attractive but not supermodel, very young looking for my age... Here is my pic,

http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fu ... d=15767190

The way I figure it, I'm looking for a girl who is between a 4 and an 8 on a scale from 1 to 10.... Reason being is because of this, whatever she lacks in perfect score on looks she will make up for in personality, and what she lacks in personality she'll make up for in looks. So, the supermodels can rarely be trusted, theyr spoiled and their usually either psycho or theyr gold diggers, really stuck up.
I find personality to be of far greater virtue, because it's inner beauty that will make a woman stay with you through the good and the bad, it's inner beauty she must possess in order to know how to treat you right. All the looks in the world won't assure that. But, some small degree of looking good is neccessary, if she's at all attractive. She doesn't have to look like a runway model, it's better she didn't.

umm... I kinda think everyone has the right to be picky and if anything its depressing that people don't exercise that option more than they do on average. Really, what you should be picky about is personality above anything else because in the end your kinda looking for someone who your heart-felt with, have enough of a good and natural emotional connection with that you could spend your life with em possibly, and while you do need some practice you want to at least stay with people who are in that possible range. Moreover you go for flat out anyone than either you have just about the most general purpose generic sense of self out there or your really showing yourself and the other person whoever it is a the time no respect. As for weight if I met a girl who was a bit over and had the kind of personality I'd want and I was physically attracted to her I think it would still be a go (and women you know all about this, attraction isn't a cognitive choice - yeah you can force yourself to ignore someone your attracted to if you don't like em as a person or can't have em but you can't MAKE yourself attracted to anyone you fundamentally aren't. I can also say I've met both attractive and unattractive women of all types and weights and its something else all together governing that for most people at least).

The second you look at just anyone of the opposit sex, have a chance at it, and say "pfff - ice cream is icecream, I don't care what the flavor is - it's ice cream" your really saying that you a). don't have any solid or objective personality aside from what society just tells you you are b). you ARE desparate, through and through c). you really don't know yourself and d)your that dependent that you NEED to have someone, if we're talking about the rights of single guys to be picky I think if anything the need to have someone is one of the biggest things that pushes women away in the first place is it not? I think people keep forgetting that especially these days as messed up as a lot of people are you can actually be a lot happier single and hell - you have your freetime, you have enough time to actually know yourself (not meant as a dirty joke), and you actually improve your own life a lot just by putting in the effort and not having the distractions that other people do. If your really feeling that needy that you'd go for anyone regardless of personality or attraction then if anything you probably need to knuckle down on yourself just for your own sake.

Whether too skinny, too thick, too ugly, too punky or bitchy, too quirky, mentally challenged, I don't think there's any group of people who should ever let people have the best of them that much that they get desperate per se - when you let yourself be 'desperate' your really swallowing society's pea-brained s--- shallow take on who you are and that take is so narrow and so pathetic that it completely ignores almost everything about you aside from some surface blemish. If we actually have souls people need to start acting the part - people need to figure out what's right for them, stay single as long as they need to, and be precision aim with it rather than just get with anything or anyone they get attention from because its not just a matter of self-respect but it's a matter of really looking out for your future and what's in it for them? Your not wasting their time when your not even a good fit - that stuff matter. I mean to each their own, maybe some people are in a station of life and have emotional and perspective boundaries completely different from mine and I can believe that but still - I find it hard to believe that companionship is worth anything unless its quality.

If a guy really does put looks first above everything else like that and has no perspective on who he has or what he has to offer, if he's 60 and still that juvenile in how he views the relationship world I kinda doubt there's much hope left for him cognitively. If it were me 60 and getting around on a cane (hopefully it won't be, my dad's 70 and he's still built) I'd be looking for someone who was close to 60 herself, had the same childhood memories, grew up on the same things I did culturally, someone who could really relate to the things that shaped me as a person and again, if she was a GILF it wouldn't hurt but it would probably be almost completely neither here nor there on whether I was attracted to her - the most beautiful part of a woman is between her ears anyway.

If a guy really does put looks first above everything else like that and has no perspective on who he has or what he has to offer, if he's 60 and still that juvenile in how he views the relationship world I kinda doubt there's much hope left for him cognitively. If it were me 60 and getting around on a cane (hopefully it won't be, my dad's 70 and he's still built) I'd be looking for someone who was close to 60 herself, had the same childhood memories, grew up on the same things I did culturally, someone who could really relate to the things that shaped me as a person and again, if she was a GILF it wouldn't hurt but it would probably be almost completely neither here nor there on whether I was attracted to her - the most beautiful part of a woman is between her ears anyway.

Everybody has the right to be picky, as much as they have the right to anything else.