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grannygege
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20 Aug 2011, 10:18 pm

My grandson is the greatest kid in the world! Hes in the 8th grade this year and last year while he was dozing in class SOMEONE CUT HIS HAIR! Im still traumatized by it and can hardly think about it. My daughter changed his school and after one year they didnt want to admit him back to class. He is disruptive sometimes and he is a big boy. But he is pushed into lockers, made fun of - I just cant stand it. What does everyone do about these kinds of issued?



Mindslave
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20 Aug 2011, 10:30 pm

I dealt with stuff like that. I ended up moving past it because that's just how I am. Sure, my parents would always try to intervene with the schoolboard, but at the end of the day I still had to deal with the kids. I wasn't taken out of the class, and I'm glad, because it's not good to teach people to run away from their problems.



bradt4evr
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20 Aug 2011, 10:32 pm

Well i have gone through a lot of bullying growing up through school, just because i had AS and i was different from other people. Here is what i did to stop it, first off, as soon as someone did something to me i ran straight to the principals office after class, and i personally would speak to the principal about it and he would take care of it, because our school has strict no bullying rules. So i would suggest your grandson personally take this matter to the principal, and let him handle it, if the principal wont do anything about it when your grandson talks to him, then its time for the parent to request a meeting with the princial and talk to the principal, then if that deosnt work i believe theres even more you can do like have a school board meeting etc. im sorry im not the most helpful i wish i could give you better advice, but its defenitely not right that your son has to be treat like this in school by his peers to the point where he has to leave the school, he deserves to get an education like everyone else and his ignorant peers have no right to interfere with his education.


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Chronos
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21 Aug 2011, 12:01 am

grannygege wrote:
My grandson is the greatest kid in the world! Hes in the 8th grade this year and last year while he was dozing in class SOMEONE CUT HIS HAIR! Im still traumatized by it and can hardly think about it. My daughter changed his school and after one year they didnt want to admit him back to class. He is disruptive sometimes and he is a big boy. But he is pushed into lockers, made fun of - I just cant stand it. What does everyone do about these kinds of issued?


I suppose I would hold the school accountable so they will hold the bullies accountable. I would also talk to the parents of the bullies...remember, they are still kids and can still be grounded, and most parents are appalled to learn their child is a bully.

I don't advocate violence, but if your son is being physically assaulted, I think he should have the right to defend himself.



cyberscan
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21 Aug 2011, 12:41 am

First, I would document each incidence of bullying. Then I would report it and demand that the school do something about it. I would document how when and with whom it was reported and any response. If there is no change, I would teach the kid how to fight and tell him to defend himself. With all the evidence you have, you can put up a big stink and even a lawsuit when the school officials try to punish the kid for defending himself.

Another choice is homeschooling.


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lovelyboy
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23 Aug 2011, 11:38 pm

This is very sad.....I'm sorry he had/has to go through this!

My son always complains about children bullying him, but what makes it a bit difficult is that for some reason he seeks out these kids to be friends and then often it ends with fighting...2 Things is starting to show now....actually this was the main reason that pushed me to realize my son might be HFA! He misread the social interaction, reacts inappropriatly and then he misreads it (some of the time) as being bullied. 2nd thing: My son is touch sensitive, so he experience 'normal' physical fighting as being bullied, so he wants to avoid it and the other kids "don't get it"......It helped when I explained it to some of his friends parents, who, without labelling him, explained it to their kids.....this helped a bit. But because my son struggles with modulation, he also seeks this rough play.....starting the cycle all over again.

Unfortunately this explained cycle and other reasons mentioned caused the principle and teacher to think that the other kids doesn't do anything wrong, that it's my son seeking it and misreading it, so they listen but don't take it very serious! There is still work to be done!

For me I think it's best, if possible, to help my son to gain insight in what of his behaviour is contributing to this being bullied, and help minimize it....and in the situations where he is really being bullied (I've witnissed it!), try and walk away, ignore and then talk to some one.

But I do agree, we need to do everything in our power to protect our kids...changing schools might help, but this pattern was repeating itself for 4 yr now, different schools, different kids.....better help him by teaching him skills to handle the situation, help him to get a 'buddy' (other child that will 'protect' him) and getting the school teacher involved.

Strenghts



Heat84
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24 Aug 2011, 5:45 am

If I ever have a kid and find out that they're being bullied, I'll have my kid point the bully out and I'll give them a stern warning. If it happens again I'll beat the crap out of them. I'll be damned if I let my kid go through what I went through and end up with the mental scars I have.


Why does law enforcement care more about cyber-bullying than actual bullying? Some jurisdictions have cyber-bullying laws on the books, but they barely even acknowledge that actual bullying even happens. I'm guessing its because cyber-bulling leaves evidence but actual bullying doesn't.


I was hoping all the school shootings that happened 10-15 years ago would be the straws that broke the camels back. But no. They blamed the shooter. I remember a discussion about one incident on CNN. They spent 95% of it blaming the shooter and talking about if you know someone is gonna shoot up their school to tell someone. Then at the end the end they basically said "And by the way, something has to be done about the bullies too.". :evil: :evil:



lovelyboy
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24 Aug 2011, 11:27 am

Heat84, I understand your emotional reaction, believe me...I often feel that way, BUT.....it's not that simple. There is often more than one bully in a school picking on your kid....You can't be the parent who is walking around beating other peoples kids! (LOL, remember they might have big, strong parents to!)
You need to set an example for your child and sometimes I do talk to the bully and tell him to back of!
I still believe that you need to help your child gain coping skills...You might sort out one situation by reacting through aggression, then the bully will say your child is a mommies boy...but there will be other bullies, with other faces!