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conundrum
Veteran
Joined: 25 May 2010
Age: 44
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,922
Location: third rock from one of many suns
21 Aug 2011, 12:40 am
21 Aug 2011, 1:49 am
Here's some of my thoughts on this.
Quote:
“I’m online even during class. I’m supposed to be taking notes but instead I’m commenting on stuff and uploading pictures.”
--Emma, 14 years old
--Emma, 14 years old
Don't blame that on the internet. Do you seriously expect me to believe that if you didn't have your phone in class, you would be taking notes? No, you would be passing notes to the same people you're chatting on Facebook with. Get your priorities straight and learn some self control.
Quote:
“I feel sad, depressed, jealous, or whatever when I don’t get a lot of “Likes” on my photo or when someone else gets way more Likes than me. Honestly, I’m not sure that parents realize how drastically it affects our self-image and confidence. If I see a picture of a really pretty girl, it’s like ‘Goodbye self-esteem.’ It forces me to compete and do stuff that I don’t want to do, so my confidence will get a boost.”
--Samantha, 14 years old
--Samantha, 14 years old
I suppose this is what the second article is referring to.
I just find it hard to believe that looking "pretty" can boost one's confidence. Looks are deceiving, and therefore mean nothing.
Quote:
“Sometimes I feel like I’m losing control. I want my parents to tell me to get off the computer. Actually, they would need to literally take the computer away because I can’t stop myself.”
--Nina, 15 years old
--Nina, 15 years old
Ah, yes. Blame that evil computer. Let's not ever take into consideration that you can't manage your own priorities yourself. It's entirely the computer's fault.
Quote:
“There is so much pressure to look happy all the time—you can never just be yourself-- because everybody is always taking pictures and posting them.”
--Nikki, 13 years old
--Nikki, 13 years old
Is there really? It's not against the law to walk around without smiling. This one must be some sort of joke.
Quote:
“I really want my mom to be proud of me. Obviously, I want her to think I’m writing my essay or doing things I should be doing instead of being on Facebook. But I also want to be online. So I lie or accuse her of not trusting me. It’s awful, but I’ve become really comfortable with lying.”
--Maya, 14 years old
--Maya, 14 years old
Once again, get some self control. I spend a lot of time online (mostly on WP), but that NEVER comes at the cost of my schoolwork. I usually finish my assignments weeks in advance; because I prioritize them above everything else.
Quote:
Some new research has shown that social networking can also have positive effects on teens such as helping introverted adolescents forge relationships or providing a venue for activism and political engagement.
Well duh. That's more like it.
Quote:
Start young. You wouldn’t let your toddler cross the street without holding your hand, so don’t hand them your iPhone to play with for the first time without starting a simple discussion about the appropriate use of technology. These discussions need to be ongoing and become more complex as kids get older.
What idiot gives a child an iPhone without teaching them how to use it? A little bit of common sense goes a long way.
Quote:
Listen. The ratio of parent listening to parent talking should be about five to one. Ask nonjudgmental questions in order to learn and assess. Here’s an example: “I heard the term cyberbullying. Do you know what this is?” If kids think they are going to be “slammed” by their parents on a topic, they will shut down.
Oh, wow. Parents should listen to and talk to their children? I never would have guessed.
Quote:
Institute family meals with tech breaks. Current psychological literature recommends that families sit down and share at least 3 or 4 meals together a week. Keep them short--under 45 minutes--and tech free for the most part. Give everyone a two-minute warning to check whatever device beforehand. After 15 minutes, allow a one minute message or text check. Aim to expand the tech free time as your kids become more focused.
Eating a meal takes 15 minutes or less. I don't mind having technology-free meals, but prolonging it like that is totally unnecessary.
Quote:
Don’t use your ignorance about technology as an excuse. It's true that kids know more about technology than parents but this is a poor reason for adults to act clueless about what teens or tweens might be doing online. Equally counterproductive is letting a kid spend hours on end alone in their room on the computer so you “can get work done.”
Why yes, ignorance is an excuse. If you're not capable of figuring out the first two suggestions, how the heck are you going to figure out how to use a computer?
Quote:
Don’t rely on secretly monitoring online activities. Not only is it an invasion of privacy, most kids can work around parents’ surveillance in a matter of minutes.
This is true. Any surveillance efforts are futile. Anyone with half a brain could figure out how to get around it.
Quote:
Look for warning signs. If your child is regularly staying home “sick” from school and spending the entire day on the computer, if they choose to be online more often than out with friends, or if their grades are suffering because they are distracted by technology, you need to step in and help them create boundaries.
Why do we have to make the assumption that being "out with friends" is more healthy than being online? This is not a rhetorical question; I seriously want to understand the logic behind this.
And now, time to comment on some other people's comments.
Quote:
These teenagers don't have lives. If you're a real teenager you would be offline a lot more than online. The outcasts are the ones online. Like me. My grades don't suffer and I'm not jealous all the time. The parents have failed and these "teens" are doing it wrong.
Oh, please. Seriously. Define a "life." I agree that these teens are doing something wrong, but I really don't want to know what your idea of a "life" is. let me guess, something about going to parties every night and having sex with a gf? That's what I think of when I think of a "real" teenager.
Quote:
take a break from dinner? REALLY? I sit that hard to sit your butt down for a whole meal with your family. My house my rules. You sit here at the table or NO computer at all.
Huh? What are you talking about? Please proofread your posts; it really helps.
Quote:
First off a child under the age of 18 doesn't need a phone, PERIOD. Secondly the only computer they should be allowed to use is one in a common area like the dining or living room for school, intellectual, and possibly hobby purposes. Children under 18 do NOT need to be on social networks and it's POOR parents that let them. And finally here's a "shocker", tell them to get off their duff's and PHYSICALLY go outside to play!
Ouch; my eyes. The ignorance hurts. First of all, why yes, I do very much need a phone. In fact, my parents REQUIRE that I keep my phone with me at all times. It's extremely important to have in any sort of emergency, or for any sort of change in plans. And, by the way, "children" under 18 don't "need" to be in sports programs either. Only food, water, and shelter are needed for survival. If you're going to argue that social networking is unnecessary, then so is physical interaction with peers.
Quote:
Being a teenager is the best time to out and about having fun. Why would they want to spend all that time online? Maybe I am just one of last generation of tech-free high school. I'm only 25.
Here we go again with the "go out and have fun." Nothing about going out ever seems like fun to me.
Quote:
Wow...I love how they interviewed 13 and 14 years olds...of course they don't have lives, they're not really teenagers yet.
This is somewhat true. But, once again, what constitutes as a life?
Now, for the second article.
Quote:
The study found that one of the main reasons for a decline in traditional values is the shift of values among characters on popular television shows during the past 50 years, from "The Andy Griffith Show" and "The Lucy Show" to "American Idol" and "Hannah Montana."
People actually watch that? Oh, yeah, people are stupid.
Quote:
“Friends, family and community need to know how to shape these children, as opposed to shaking their heads and saying we’ve lost a generation,”says Lipari
I'm pretty sure it is actually a lost cause. I gave up years ago.
21 Aug 2011, 2:02 am
21 Aug 2011, 4:58 am
SammichEater wrote:
Listen. The ratio of parent listening to parent talking should be about five to one. Ask nonjudgmental questions in order to learn and assess. Here’s an example: “I heard the term cyberbullying. Do you know what this is?” If kids think they are going to be “slammed” by their parents on a topic, they will shut down.
Oh, wow. Parents should listen to and talk to their children? I never would have guessed. Rolling Eyes
Oh, wow. Parents should listen to and talk to their children? I never would have guessed. Rolling Eyes
I dunno, my parents still haven't figured it out
21 Aug 2011, 2:52 pm
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