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dealing with people who don't understand

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iceveela
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30 Aug 2011, 4:27 pm

I cannot understand the things most NT's do, but I have a lot of people telling me "you would be normal, ever considered that?", I have considered it... and the evidence does not point that way... they just think I am someone who is crying wolf and being "self-pitying". They won't even consider that I am different than they are... I feel like people are just misunderstanding me, and trying to push me into their little box... Its frustrating...

My thoughts are all weird and its hard for me to explain it all... but why do people treat me as if I just need to "try harder"... I don't know what to do... I am already confused... and its hard for me without all these people attack me for being "lazy" and "building a wall" in front of me...
Its annoying and I don't know what to do... I know that I am different than other people, and that I don't see things the way they do, but i cannot explain why and how i know that... its really hard for me to explain everything...

I don't know what to do... But I know I cannot do this anymore, and that I have to get diagnosed and on medication for my poor concnetration and memory in order to fulfill the greater portion of my life...

i don;t know... I am just confused... like always...



Maje
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30 Aug 2011, 5:06 pm

iceveela wrote:
I am already confused... and its hard for me without all these people attack me for being "lazy" and "building a wall" in front of me...


I dont know how many times I have heard about that wall. I have never taken it so seriously though. Thought it was not the worst thing people can think of me as it sounds like I have a well organized self defense system or something.



Fnord
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30 Aug 2011, 5:08 pm

Reminds me of a line from X-Men II:

"Have you tried ... not being a mutant?" -- Madeline Drake to her son Bobby

Excerpt from TV Tropes Article:

Quote:
"There's a certain group of people. They have a normal childhood, to an extent, but somewhere along the way, they discover they're different. Not like the other children. Not like their parents. They're something unusual. Something that means they can never fit in. They hide their differences deep away from themselves, but it eats away at them.

Then they find others like them - also living in secret and ostracized from society. A subculture, upholding a masquerade of being normal by day, but living out a secret lifestyle in seedy bars and locations. They might ask their family if they would still love them, but chances are that if they ever tell their parents, acceptance will be hard, and they'll inevitably be asked, 'Have you tried ... not being a monster?'"

No wonder super-hero comics, manga, and similar stories all seem to resonate so well with Aspies.


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Apple_in_my_Eye
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30 Aug 2011, 5:20 pm

People are pretty much always like that, even with physical health problems (especially ones where where it isn't obvious at a glance). They're projecting and getting it wrong, but they'll probably never get that they're getting it wrong.

It sucks, but sometimes you have to do what you know you need to do, regardless of what any one else thinks.



Ilka
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30 Aug 2011, 9:37 pm

Meds might work for concentration, but what you really need is behavior modification therapy. A good therapist. The lazyness is not really laziness, but your brain playing tricks on you. With help you can learn to focus better and organize yourself in order to get things done. Its difficult, but not impossible. My daughter is only 11 years old and she has improved a lot. She concentrates better and get things done. She still needs help, but she is working on her own most of the time, and starting on her own. My husband found "Getting things done" very useful to help him organize better.