OP, I've been in similar situations to yours countless times. It's part of the way we process things, which is what author Donna Williams referred to as "monotrack" or one thing at a time. It is hard to keep track of multiple things at once, not to mention frustrating!
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Given a “tentative” diagnosis as a child as I needed services at school for what was later correctly discovered to be a major anxiety disorder.
This misdiagnosis caused me significant stress, which lessened upon finding out the truth about myself from my current and past long-term psychiatrists - that I am a highly sensitive person but do not have an autism spectrum disorder
My diagnoses - anxiety disorder, depression and traits of obsessive-compulsive disorder (all in remission).
I’m no longer involved with the ASD world.