need advice on approaching other aspie girls i like

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aspie48
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11 Oct 2011, 7:45 pm

i am in an aspergers class at school. there is a girl in another aspergers class that i like, but since she is in another class it is hard to get to know her. of course i am awkward and don't know what to say. i am often called a stalker because i make eye contact at the wrong times and i am awkward. because of this i am afraid to try to spend more time with her. i feel she would probably be a lot less bitchy than nt girls but i'm really not sure. the big deal is that homecoming dance is 2 weeks from now. i'm not sure if she would like it cuz some aspies get overwhelmed in those kinds of situations. i don't know her well enough to ask tho... and i don't want to just ask out of the blue without becoming friends first.
sorry for length, pathetic, and pointlessness of my post.



Joker
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11 Oct 2011, 8:01 pm

Ask some body that knows the girl well find out the things she likes an likes to do make her interests seem like their yours it works every time for me but since I am Bi-Gender its really easy for me to talk to girls not trying to brag its just a gift I have 8)



Grisha
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11 Oct 2011, 8:02 pm

aspie48 wrote:
i am in an aspergers class at school. there is a girl in another aspergers class that i like, but since she is in another class it is hard to get to know her. of course i am awkward and don't know what to say. i am often called a stalker because i make eye contact at the wrong times and i am awkward. because of this i am afraid to try to spend more time with her. i feel she would probably be a lot less bitchy than nt girls but i'm really not sure. the big deal is that homecoming dance is 2 weeks from now. i'm not sure if she would like it cuz some aspies get overwhelmed in those kinds of situations. i don't know her well enough to ask tho... and i don't want to just ask out of the blue without becoming friends first.
sorry for length, pathetic, and pointlessness of my post.


Hopefully someone who actually knows what they are talking about will chime in, but I have a few thoughts:

I used to get phone numbers of classmates I had the hots for by asking them if I could call them to get the assignments if I missed class. I don't remember ever getting turned down, but then again I don't remember actually calling any of the numbers I collected either...
:wink:

School dances are mostly things to go to and be seen at, not so much to be enjoyed for their own sake. Just asking, dressing up, having your picture taken together, and enjoying a slow dance is usually enough for anyone except the social elite.

Once again, I never actually had the balls to ask anyone to one, so I'm just repeating information I've picked up over the years. :oops:

I'm sure if you really put your mind to it and banish the unwarranted negative thoughts from your head you can figure out a way to get it done. I once asked a classmate for the first digit of her phone number and that was enough to get the ball rolling.

Good luck!



bruinsy33
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11 Oct 2011, 8:07 pm

aspie48 wrote:
i am in an aspergers class at school. there is a girl in another aspergers class that i like, but since she is in another class it is hard to get to know her. of course i am awkward and don't know what to say. i am often called a stalker because i make eye contact at the wrong times and i am awkward. because of this i am afraid to try to spend more time with her. i feel she would probably be a lot less bitchy than nt girls but i'm really not sure. the big deal is that homecoming dance is 2 weeks from now. i'm not sure if she would like it cuz some aspies get overwhelmed in those kinds of situations. i don't know her well enough to ask tho... and i don't want to just ask out of the blue without becoming friends first.
sorry for length, pathetic, and pointlessness of my post.
I assume that most of the students are going to the homecoming dance ,right? Under those conditions I don't think you necessarily need to develop a friendship first.Introduce yourself and ask her if she is going to the dance with anyone ,if not ask her to go with you.If you can't say it to her ,write it down and hand her a note and wait for her response.I know it is ''junior high like'' but nobody said having AS was easy,whatever method works.



rastiazul
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19 Oct 2011, 2:34 pm

aspergers class exist?



aspie48
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19 Oct 2011, 3:19 pm

rastiazul wrote:
aspergers class exist?

only in my countys public schools yeah



rastiazul
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19 Oct 2011, 7:32 pm

thats so awesome, i never imagined it



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19 Oct 2011, 7:48 pm

Write her a note and give her the note in the hall. Be direct: Would you like to meet after school?

You'll still need to eventually talk to her though. ;)

(Note: NT girls respond to very very different things. Being direct is exactly what not to do, unless you are in a nightclub and both of you are drunk. "You look nice today" is a great place to start. Let her think about it and figure it out.)



aspie48
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19 Oct 2011, 8:42 pm

rastiazul wrote:
thats so awesome, i never imagined it
Yeah I live in arlington va so you could try looking it up, not sure what u would find tho.



aspie48
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19 Oct 2011, 8:46 pm

Ok-update
I have asked her to the homecoming and she gave me her email. I met her
Mom, idk what she thinks, I can't read people well. She was pleased to be asked cuz in the past I think girls have said " whatever" or just gone cuz they knew I might pay for their stuff. Being accepted like that is a new personal acheivement for me. Thank y'all for advice.
Success :D :D :D