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zer0netgain
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20 Oct 2011, 1:31 pm

A lot of NTs with motorcycles have similar issues. :lol:



OJani
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20 Oct 2011, 2:07 pm

My ex gf wanted me to escort her to a clinic for an examination that I never did. I thought she's a grown-up, too. :D

She pretty much wanted to have my life under her control, e.g. how I act and talk publicly, what I wear (no holes in the underwear/socks), this kind of stuff, plus I was supposed to help her or take my share in house cleaning as frequently as pleased her, while there's not much on this Earth I hate more than house-cleaning scores. :evil:


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zen_mistress
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21 Oct 2011, 12:42 am

Lol! I am not good with calculators. I used to have a scientific calculator at uni though. It had a number of unfathomable functions on it. I had no idea what to do with it so I would just put in random numbers and press random buttons and see what happened.


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ToughDiamond
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21 Oct 2011, 3:33 am

Callista wrote:
You got to get somebody who likes you for who you are

You'd think practically everybody would know that, wouldn't you? I mean anything else is just going to cause misery for both parties.



HalibutSandwich
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21 Oct 2011, 4:10 am

ToughDiamond wrote:
You'd think practically everybody would know that, wouldn't you? I mean anything else is just going to cause misery for both parties.
I'm not sure if that's a condescending remark or not. It sounds like you're saying I should have known she wasn't right for me? I hate to tell you but people lie about who they are all the time (I do it too). And people change all the time too, especially at that age. Hey, the sex was good, lol.

I'm actually quite surprised that some women took my side on this. I expected after I said I spent the night playing with a calculator you girls would have made it clear that's not the way to show your gf or her family that you're worthy. Not that I ever thought I was worthy at any time during the entire relationship. I have very low self esteem.



zen_mistress
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21 Oct 2011, 5:07 am

The thread title is pretty cute, so that has probably played a part in the positive response you have got.

Also I think a lot of us have been in the position where our romantic partner was not fond of our special interest.


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ToughDiamond
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21 Oct 2011, 5:35 am

HalibutSandwich wrote:
ToughDiamond wrote:
You'd think practically everybody would know that, wouldn't you? I mean anything else is just going to cause misery for both parties.
I'm not sure if that's a condescending remark or not. It sounds like you're saying I should have known she wasn't right for me? I hate to tell you but people lie about who they are all the time (I do it too). And people change all the time too, especially at that age. Hey, the sex was good, lol.

I'm actually quite surprised that some women took my side on this. I expected after I said I spent the night playing with a calculator you girls would have made it clear that's not the way to show your gf or her family that you're worthy. Not that I ever thought I was worthy at any time during the entire relationship. I have very low self esteem.


No I didn't mean to insinuate that you should have known better than to get involved. I know that some partners can be quite adept at the entrapment game, seeming very easy-going at first and then tightening things up when they're more confident that their partner will tolerate it. It should be obvious to the partner who does the nit-picking that the entrapment game can't work out happily. I don't understand why they don't explain their requirements during the selection phase.....best guess is that they either don't know themselves well enough to be aware of how they're going to feel as the bonds deepen, or they're looking for somebody to use rather than somebody to love. My own track record is quite poor - when I was younger I didn't know my feelings so I did tend to entrap women. I believe I'm a lot better now but I still find it hard to weigh somebody up accurately when a new romance is beginning. And even when I do, the women I've been involved with have usually not wanted to hear about it.



HalibutSandwich
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21 Oct 2011, 7:04 am

ToughDiamond wrote:
No I didn't mean to insinuate that you should have known better than to get involved. I know that some partners can be quite adept at the entrapment game, seeming very easy-going at first and then tightening things up when they're more confident that their partner will tolerate it.

Thanks for clarifying that.

I'm a bit emotional at the moment because a certain organization has trapped me into getting an assessment that will cost an arm and a leg, when I just had a phone call from a FOAF that has an aspie son. She gave me the phone number of a psych who's ASD friendly and I can see him for almost free through a mental healthcare plan. Although he may not be able to give me an official Dx, well that's not my aim. She said just talking to me on the phone I definitely seem aspie or pdd-nos. She's no expert in the field but her work overlaps with it. Although knowing I'm truly aspie won't change who I am I suspect it may change how I am. The world will be my oyster, or at least a shell to hide in. Think positive Dave!



Callista
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21 Oct 2011, 7:21 am

HalibutSandwich wrote:
I'm actually quite surprised that some women took my side on this. I expected after I said I spent the night playing with a calculator you girls would have made it clear that's not the way to show your gf or her family that you're worthy. Not that I ever thought I was worthy at any time during the entire relationship. I have very low self esteem.
Jeez, give us some credit; we're not all completely boring people who don't like math or tech or appreciate that other people might like it. :P It's not like we've got some sort of secret no-boys-allowed club with rules like "Thou Shalt Always Complain About Thy Boyfriend's Technology"!

I think if your significant other can't understand that you are going to need time for yourself and your special interest, then the relationship really won't work very well. Similarly, if she's NT and you don't recognize her need to spend time socializing--with you and with her own friends--then it probably won't work, either.


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