Can anyone name a strange trait with my autistic son please!

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The 'thing' my 8 year old son does is hard to explain: It's like he's asleep but awake. You can talk to him and he will blank me and won't answer but would follow an instruction still without acknowledging me, even his facial expressions don't change. I keep coming across the words Dissociation and incomplete attachment but it doesn't fit. It's like he's doing it at will?

It only seems to happen when he's angry like when he has been told off. I originally thought it was his way if saying: you can't tell me off and im annoyed with you so i wont acknowledge you ( He cant talk very well anyway). But for the length of time he can do it it is worrying.

Has anyone come across it before and is it just an Autistic trait and is there a way to handle the situation?

Any help or advice appreciated!

xx

It kind of reminds me of 'red mist,' where someone is so angry that they can't see, or recall anything, but still perform certain tasks. Or it might be that he has retreated to a mental 'safe place' to try and protect him from the emotional after-effects of being told off. I know that I tend to retreat, or feel angry or somehow damaged if I get told off or reprimanded, or even if I have perceive it has happened, without it actually being the case.

Thanks industrialx,

That sounds logical! Maybe it doesn't have a term and i'm trying to make an issue out of something that's not!

Thanks for the reply xx

He's probably just pissed. I do that to my husband when I'm mad at him-- I'll ignore him for the most part, but do what he asks. Like the silent treatment.

I don't think this is an AS thing, or even that odd.

Sounds like stubbornness to me!

I hadn't thought he might just be being stubborn!

I'm finding it hard to work out what is normal childhood behaviour and what is As.

Thanks xx

One theory about autism, the "Intense World Theory" proposes that, contrary to common thought, autistics feel things very acutely. The theory suggests that the detachment from the world around them exhibited by middle and low functioning autistics is due to their inability to cope with the intensity of the sensations they are constantly bombarded with so they retreat into their own world. His reaction could be something akin to that. His emotion about getting in trouble may be so intense that he simply can't process it so he shuts off.

You know, if you're seeing a professional already, it wouldn't hurt to mention it. There is a relationship between Autism and Epilepsy - though I've never heard of anyone having a seizure and being responsive, I guess it's not unheard of: http://www.epilepsy.com/EPILEPSY/seizur ... calabsence

Not to worry you; I can see all kinds of other possible explanations - my son's meltdowns always used to strike me as being seizure-like, and we've ruled out anything like epilepsy; it may just be what's described above. For instance, one thing we notice in my son is that when he's really struggling, he tends to hurt himself - not deliberately, he'll fall or bump into something or stub his toe. I imagine that consciousness for him is a bit like the old Ed Sullivan plate spinners - he only has so many plates he can keep in the air at once, so if something overwhelms him, one of the first things to go is proprioperception.

Thanks for the link, had a look around the net and correct me if im wrong it seems that if it's seizures then they last seconds to minutes... with my son its more minutes to hours.

Thank you for all your ideas im starting to agree with the detachment ideas that he just can't handle it and retreats as he can still be distant for an age after an episode, it could just be him being stubborn but i cant see a child (my son anyway) having that much determination.

If it's not against forum rules etc ill print this thread off and take it to our doctor and see what she can advise (always get rail roaded into something else when we get to the doctors lol)

Thank you xx

That's what I do when I get bad anxiety attacks. If he's like me, he isn't choosing to do it. He goes into his own world where he's safe. I get it from being angry, or from being overstimulated. He might not even notice you. I get blackouts, or more like redouts, where I have no idea what's going on around me, but I keep going through motions of what I would do. Or I get these weird things where I blank out everyone in the room. I can see the room, the people are blurs, and I keep going. My hearing tends to shut off during those, so if he gets the same kind of thing, he can't help it, and can't register that you're trying to interact. That or he's just so pissed that he can't get himself to speak.

It could be dissociation, that's what I've always been told mine is. He might be doing it on purpose, or he might not. If you can get him to talk to you when he comes out of it, ask him if he knew you were talking and heard/understood what you said. Or if he's more visual, have him draw how it was.

I used to do that when I was a kid. I'd walk around like that, no expression. Often I'd speak while doing it, just saying a word or two over and over.

It disturbed my stepmother a great deal, but it wasn't unpleasant for me. I'm sure it was stress-related, though.

It would now seem to be an anger thing... like building a wall between him and whatever is upsetting/distressing him. I know he can hear me because he can follow an order but wont engage in conversation, eye contact or participate in an activity. He will just focus on something to stare at unless doing something specific.

He's not a danger to himself or others and because It seems rude and unruly I now send him to his room which he does like its auto pilot. He will then either stare or assemble lego until he falls asleep.

I havn't managed to talk to him as he hasn't got the hang of being able to describe things yet and shrugs when I have asked him about it.

Thank you for all your replies/stories and insights, starting to get a picture/sense of how it must feel! I appreciate it,

xx

Definitely have him tested for absence or other type of seizures. Is his his diagnosis is Aspergers or classic autism as you say that he does not speak well....did he have a speech delay or does he just not like to talk? People with Aspergers talk early and although we can have very bad verbal communication we typically use words at young ages that most other kids do not like my son calls cats "felines" and dogs "canines"....things like this. Also we can have stuttering or other types of speech issues like lisp, ect. My son has developed a stuttering problem that is much like I had at his age, its like his brain is going to fast for his mouth so he sort of gets stuck on one word leading into the next. He is bi lingual and he does this in both English and French. The biggest problem I have with my kids is communication....they both do not know when or how to ask for help. My son is 9 with Aspergers (I have it too) and my daughter is 6 with classic autism. They have some of the same issues but my son speaks A LOT and he has his topics of interest that he goes on and on about, and then some days all he does is meow at me. My daughter did not speak until between 3 and 4 and still has a lot of issues with back and forth communication. She also has what we believe are absence seizures where she will stare at the wall or ceiling. Sometimes she is just "daydreaming" but when she is having a "seizure" she will sometimes drool or if we toss a stuffed animal into her lap it does not phase her, no blinking or attempts to catch or even look at it. This may be something that you could try to see if hes just gone off into la la land or if he is having a seizure. Toss him a stuffed animal or small pillow. My daughters absence seizures have gotten less and less frequent so we just watch her to make sure it does not get worse as they only last a few seconds or up to two minutes.

Interesting reactions here. My initial reaction was - yup! I do this myself.

In my case, I can sink into hyper focus quite easily but I have learned to keep partial awareness to my surroundings. I react and comply - because as a kid, that was what was required - without breaking my focus on whatever it is I'm engaged in. One of the reasons is because when I'm interrupted, getting back into what it was I focused on can be extremely frustrating to next to impossible. If I'm VERY into a book I'm reading and someone interrupts me significantly -to pull me away from it for 1/2 hour or so - it's very likely I won't pick the book back up and finish it or, I will need to reread several chapters and try to regain my focus. and it's extremely frustrating for people to not understand that. Something they see as no big deal... you can just go back to it after your done... isn't an option. Sometimes asking me to stop something is the same as telling me - you can't do that anymore. It's the most common occassion where I'll get snippy with people.

Putting anger into the mix - it's somewhat common for those on the spectrum to shut down verbally after an emotional outburst. I know if I get upset enough, I sort of just 'exist' for a few days. 'The silent robot treatment' is what my husband calls it. I just can't speak. I am thinking just fine, I'm am perfectly aware, I can even write out my thoughts with great clarity but I'm just cut off verbally from the outside for awhile. It's like strong emotions flips a switch and sucks all the energy out of you. It just needs time to recharge and find the right switch to flip back on. In a calm, non confrontational moment, you may be able to question him about that possibility.