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TenaciousB
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23 Oct 2011, 11:53 am

Has Anyone else ever made really bad decisions because they took someone literally?

Without going into a great amount of detail, when I got ready to graduate high school, (I am the youngest of 3 with 2 older sisters - one has since died) my mom comes into my room and tells me that she and my dad were talking and they thought that they would like to help me pay to go to art school. I was excited and hopeful...for about 2 seconds. THEN she chimes in and says...well, of course, THAT WOULD MEAN that it would take them longer to finish building their vacation home!! !! ! And that's how it was left.

So up until very recently I deduced that anything that I did to improve my life i.e. going to college, having a life of my own etc..etc.. would be taking something away FROM THEM! (Strictly literal thinking).

Then more recently I have been involved with someone and not long after we met he told me that regarding his living conditions...that he was being "kicked to the curb". I took that literally. Envisioning him on the sidewalk with suitcases...so I offered to have him come live with me. (Never occurred to me that he might have other options and/or it was not my responsibility!! !!)

I'm currently in therapy and we are looking at goals and options. The topic of possibly being an Aspie has not come up (and I'm not even sure if I am...I took one online test - r d o s . n e t - about 150 questions I seem to remember...and the Aspie score is 142 of 200 and NT is 72 out of 200 with the summary: "You are very likely an Aspie".)

So, I guess what I am wondering...if taking these situations quite literally as I have can be attributed to the Aspie trait? My two older sisters seemed to have figured out VERY EARLY ON to maybe see my parents for the selfish, unsupported and abusive people that they were and they cut their losses and got the heck out of dodge...I didn't.

It's all very confusing to me and I'm not sure my T will understand what enormous ramifications have transpired because of taking what people say too literally?

I feel very dense and naive for not figuring this out sooner and I am well over 30 years old!



peterd
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28 Oct 2011, 3:50 am

The worst thing about taking things literally is that we don't realise we're doing it until someone points it out. It feels perfectly reasonable up to that point.

(Yes, it's normal for aspies to make complete twats of themselves by not noticing that their literality is excessive)



League_Girl
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28 Oct 2011, 4:39 am

Or sometimes we do figure out on our own we took it literal because it becomes clear now what they meant when they said it.

We may also appear to be lacking common sense.


I remember the time in high school when my biology teacher said another teacher caught him with his pants down and I wondered why he had them pulled down instead of in the restroom. I then got told it was a figure of speech. This is one of the classic traits I have.

OP, I don't get how the first one was literal thinking. I mean if they helped you pay for school it would take them longer to finish their vacation home. What else could they mean? Only solution I see to that is don't have them help you pay for school and pay for it all yourself.



langers
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29 Oct 2011, 10:03 am

Yesterday at school (I'm in college) my chem prof. asked "How's you're problems going" his exact words, of course I began to go into all my problems, seeing the psyc, talking about goin on meds, blah blah, He quickly stopped me and said Chemistry Problems. I had automatically tried to answer a question that was directed at me, took it literally and forgot the social boundaries and context. Was I ever embarrassed, of course once it was pointed out I saw it for what it was but I would have never figured it out myself!! DUH! I have had things like this happen so much that I could not possibly remember all the times I have made an idiot out of myself, luckily most people who know me well understand this quirk of mine.



itsnot42itsas
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29 Oct 2011, 4:42 pm

Recently I saw my Doc, he asked me how much I was drinking, I said I make sure I take at least 2 litres daily.

Then when he said "alcohol?" I said zero, nothing, never ever have.


I used to think a broken arm meant that part of it was laid on the ground, I was very young at the time.



LittleBlackCat
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02 Nov 2011, 2:50 pm

The other day I was in the bookshop with my daughter, I was in the non-fiction section and she was in the children's section. When we were leaving I asked her what she had been reading and, in complete seriousness, she answered "books".