Hitting on another girl at school after being rejected?

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OldFashioned
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28 Oct 2011, 12:45 pm

So, is it bad to hit on another girl merely days after you tried to invite another girl out? I'm so sick of being single and I don't want to wait before asking out another pretty girl who looks like she actually owns a brain. :wink:

PS: I am talking about a university style art school but with only 200 students.



tronist
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28 Oct 2011, 1:33 pm

OldFashioned wrote:
So, is it bad to hit on another girl merely days after you tried to invite another girl out? I'm so sick of being single and I don't want to wait before asking out another pretty girl who looks like she actually owns a brain. :wink:

PS: I am talking about a university style art school but with only 200 students.

absolutely. if a girl isnt into you, and rejected you, there is not one single thing keeping you from asking out another girl.

i would, however, like to give you some advice on 'the approach' // your strategy you are employing. if you just walk up to a girl and say 'HAY! GO OUT WITH ME!' (in even the most elegant of words) it will likely not work, and you wont get her number.

a better strategy is as follows:

1.) start with HI. no corny pickup lines that she, and every other girl in the world has heard of a million times. they dont work, so dont use them. just be respectful, and dont give her the feeling you are into her past 'this person might be cool, so i feel like talking to her because im confident and i can'.

2.) talk about the situation she is in, or the situation you are both in. this would include something that recently happened, or something thats happening where you are at. things like that. an example of this would be to ask a girl if she needs help finding something if shes frantically looking, etc.

3.) then, the ending is the most important. if you felt you hit it off with her, try to disengage saying something like 'it was very nice talking to you, but i have somewhere i need to be (this is the only lie you'll tell her! NO MOAR LIES PAST THIS ONE hehe)'

4.) then you turn 90 degrees like you are walking away, then 'catch yourself', turn back, and follow up with 'hey, you seem super cool. we should re-connect sometime'. this choice of words is very important. from what ive heard, girls like the sound of 're-connecting' because girls like to 'connect', if that makes sense.

5.) PULL OUT YOUR PHONE

6.) then say 'whats your number?'

this line of 'play' will have hopefully established a bit of a connection / positive reaction from the girl at steps 1 and 2, made it seem like you had other things you needed to attend to on step 3 (she'll wonder, which builds interest :D), whilst also showing her you could do without her on step 3 also. then, on step 4 you have this 'epiphany' that will make her think you are thinking 'hey, maybe this could be more, i dont want to pass this up'. then, on step number 5 and 6 you are the 'alpha male' showing you can lead, and showing that you get what you want, and you demand for it (politely, of course lol).

the next part is probably the hardest. after you get a girls phone number, you ABSOLUTELY SHOULD NOT CALL HER for AT LEAST 5 days. FIVE ENTIRE DAYS. no calling, no texting, no nothing. you have to MAINTAIN and stay ON COURSE with this. if you slip up, sure, she might think you are into her, but thats against the objective at this point. you want her WONDERING

1.) what you are doing INSTEAD of calling her
2.) if you are interested, or not

then when you DO call her she (hopefully) will have been looking forward to your call (so she'll actually answer it)

your one phone call at least 5 days later will also give you the chance to ask her to set up a date (iuno if i'd call it a 'date' because that comes with some negative AND positive.. 'ring' to it, for lack of the correct word XD)

lastly, if you ever schedule something with a girl and she cancels but doesnt give you an alternate date, she isnt interested, or is unsure. do NOT press the girl at this point. if you keep asking she'll be more and more sure she doesnt want you. inversely, if she cancels but doesnt reschedule and you dont persue her, she'll think 'maybe i didnt do the right thing', or 'whats he up to', or 'maybe i should set something up with him'. the best thing to do if she doesnt re-schedule is to not contact her. be very diligent about not contacting girls too much. if you are even a bit overzealous (seeing her more than ONE SINGLE TIME PER WEEK for a date), or calling / texting her too often, it will kill the attraction SUPER QUICK which is NOT what you want.

take it slow. yanno how slow you just thought of? yea, slower than that.

prolly 10 weeks of going on 1 date / week with her. also, never ever ever ever ever do 'group dates'. even if she wants to go out with you the next night, or whatever, i'd be very cautious, and probably not do it. like i said, if you spend too much time with a girl too fast, her interest level will drop more than what it could have potentially been at in the same time frame (compared to not talking to her as much, and not seeing her as much).

hope this helped someone, as this is a lot of my findings on the subject :D



Wolfheart
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28 Oct 2011, 2:07 pm

OldFashioned wrote:
So, is it bad to hit on another girl merely days after you tried to invite another girl out? I'm so sick of being single and I don't want to wait before asking out another pretty girl who looks like she actually owns a brain. :wink:

PS: I am talking about a university style art school but with only 200 students.


Not at all, it's perfectly fine to move on, you have no obligation to the previous girl and if it gets upset or jealous, it just means she wanted to string you along.



arielhawksquill
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28 Oct 2011, 2:26 pm

It's perfectly OK.



OldFashioned
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28 Oct 2011, 3:09 pm

tronist wrote:
OldFashioned wrote:
So, is it bad to hit on another girl merely days after you tried to invite another girl out? I'm so sick of being single and I don't want to wait before asking out another pretty girl who looks like she actually owns a brain. :wink:

PS: I am talking about a university style art school but with only 200 students.

[...]


Don't girls like confident men?

Your approach seems a little... Shy...

My goal is to get a girlfriend within a month and loose my virginity within 6 months. I'm so sick of it now, I set myself a goal so hopefully I will reach it and find Miss Right.



Janissy
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28 Oct 2011, 3:27 pm

OldFashioned wrote:
tronist wrote:
OldFashioned wrote:
So, is it bad to hit on another girl merely days after you tried to invite another girl out? I'm so sick of being single and I don't want to wait before asking out another pretty girl who looks like she actually owns a brain. :wink:

PS: I am talking about a university style art school but with only 200 students.

[...]


Don't girls like confident men?

Your approach seems a little... Shy...

My goal is to get a girlfriend within a month and loose my virginity within 6 months. I'm so sick of it now, I set myself a goal so hopefully I will reach it and find Miss Right.


It actually seems complicated rather than shy. But if having a blueprint works, then this seems ok. The problem I think it presents is not that it is too shy (it isn't, it's actually reasonably confident) but it is so scripted that adhereing to it too much might make you get flustered if she goes "off script" and you have to improvise. But it is a starting point. If I were you, I'd forget about those timelines you have set up. They work great as a plot device in teen comedies but in reality, nearing your arbitrary deadline will probably make you even more likely to get flustered and nervous around women because you'll be under this pressure to accomplish this before your deadline.



tronist
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30 Oct 2011, 1:59 pm

OldFashioned wrote:
tronist wrote:
OldFashioned wrote:
So, is it bad to hit on another girl merely days after you tried to invite another girl out? I'm so sick of being single and I don't want to wait before asking out another pretty girl who looks like she actually owns a brain. :wink:

PS: I am talking about a university style art school but with only 200 students.

[...]


Don't girls like confident men?

Your approach seems a little... Shy...

My goal is to get a girlfriend within a month and loose my virginity within 6 months. I'm so sick of it now, I set myself a goal so hopefully I will reach it and find Miss Right.

no, its not shy. my approach does a lot of things psychologically with the girl. its kind of like 'everythings fair in love and war' or however that quote goes. basically you take the pressure off of her for wanting her number, then when she thinks 'wait.. i was totally sure he would ask for it' and you dont, shes bamboozled for a bit. then when you turn back she feels relieved that that is what you wanted after all.

its not being shy, its being tactful. shyness and lack of confidence is not what you are after with this approach. its making her think that you arent totally sure if shes 'miss right' or not so she'll want to work at being 'miss right' for you.

its basically the opposite of putting a girl on a pedestal. if you build a girl up to be the best thing since sliced bread, tell her shes the most gorgeous girl you've ever seen, tell her shes perfect, she'll likely up her standards and think she can do better, and think about going out with other guys instead of you (weighing her options). if you act as if you are only as interested as she is, or a bit less even, she'll peruse you, which is MUCH more advantageous in terms of actually achieving your goal of having a girlfriend.

it makes sense if you think about it for a little bit :D

if your goal is getting a girlfriend in 1 month i'd suggest a massive amount of practice. go to bars or clubs or parties at least 2 times a week (more = more practice = faster results) and force yourself to talk to girls. all you gotta do is 'open'. even if you fail, you'll get better at it every single time. eventually whatever it is inside of you holding you back will snap and say 'SCREW THIS! IM THE MAN!' and you'll overflow with confidence when you meet people. it will take a lot of practice, and you WILL be turned down a lot, but thats the entire point. you work at it and you get better. dont ever focus in on one girl like shes the only girl on the planet. if you do that, you'll also lower your chances of being with her. you gotta keep calm, and keep confident.

bars are also the best place to meet girls who want to have sex.

and yea, i realize this is probably not where you want to be meeting potential girlfriends. meeting girlfriends at these bars is ABSOLUTELY NOT THE POINT of going to them. its the practice of meeting people and talking to them, and doing your best every time that will help you truly improve. i spose' you can do this in other settings, this one just happens to be convenient with girls buzzing around everywhere wanting to be hit on (which is why if you approach them normally instead of 'DAYUMMMM GURL YOU FINE' you'll already be ahead of the game). you could also just try to talk to pretty girls every time you see them, just to get your 'repetitions in' (as awful as that sounds, using people as practice XD).

but hey, if you want to improve your game, you gotta work at it. thats just how it is. you cant stagnate and expect to see results based on zero effort, right?



femme
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30 Oct 2011, 6:18 pm

The first girl rejected you for a reason so do try not to make the same mistake when talking to another girl.



AngelKnight
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01 Nov 2011, 3:48 pm

OldFashioned wrote:
So, is it bad to hit on another girl merely days after you tried to invite another girl out? I'm so sick of being single and I don't want to wait before asking out another pretty girl who looks like she actually owns a brain. :wink:

PS: I am talking about a university style art school but with only 200 students.


You might be in for a bit of a surprise if you're asking another girl within the same group of 200 students. Word tends to eventually get around in a group that small.

But in general, no, there's no ethics-related reason to avoid being sociable.