30 Dec 2011, 1:27 pm
seekingtruth wrote:
Nice to hear I'm not completely alone in this. It's been scary and lonely thinking I'm so 'odd' this way. Odd in the real world and then again feeling odd in this forum as I don't have the math type connections that other's have.
I see where 'people puzzle' skills are very helpful in the real world, but it seems rare so I've so often wondered what the hell is wrong with me. It's made me at times want to just completely stay away from people because it's so clear that my thought process is so different and I feel so unrelatable.
Yep, very easy to manipulate, which is pretty much what I did as a child, was always teacher's pet, they all loved me. But unfortunately I could 'fake it' so well, or I guess you could say one step ahead enough that I never got any help that I really could have used, you know?
Then as an adult I had mad selling skills because of my ability to manipulate. But then my spirituality kicked in, it was where I could 'fit in' and feel like I was 'at home' with my ease in the big picture world. And that's when I became a Buddhist - best thing that's ever happened to me. BUT now my ethics are heightened with my teaching and now I can't be in sales anymore because I feel all too clearly how wrong it is to manipulate, and trust me to be good in sales you have to manipulate. So tapping into ethics has destroyed my career ability.
I have absolutely no shyness and love to speak in groups, only class I liked in high school was speach class. So I'm sure I don't have social anxiety disorders, but because I know I am so 'out of the box' on how I relate and see peoples actions, it gets exhausting to 'pretend' to be on their more down to earth level and because of that I have to gear up to be in social situations. And then I crash and have several days where I have to be alone to 'regroup'. It's exhausting to slow it down and think superficaially, but to fit in I have to do it.
I see where 'people puzzle' skills are very helpful in the real world, but it seems rare so I've so often wondered what the hell is wrong with me. It's made me at times want to just completely stay away from people because it's so clear that my thought process is so different and I feel so unrelatable.
Yep, very easy to manipulate, which is pretty much what I did as a child, was always teacher's pet, they all loved me. But unfortunately I could 'fake it' so well, or I guess you could say one step ahead enough that I never got any help that I really could have used, you know?
Then as an adult I had mad selling skills because of my ability to manipulate. But then my spirituality kicked in, it was where I could 'fit in' and feel like I was 'at home' with my ease in the big picture world. And that's when I became a Buddhist - best thing that's ever happened to me. BUT now my ethics are heightened with my teaching and now I can't be in sales anymore because I feel all too clearly how wrong it is to manipulate, and trust me to be good in sales you have to manipulate. So tapping into ethics has destroyed my career ability.
I have absolutely no shyness and love to speak in groups, only class I liked in high school was speach class. So I'm sure I don't have social anxiety disorders, but because I know I am so 'out of the box' on how I relate and see peoples actions, it gets exhausting to 'pretend' to be on their more down to earth level and because of that I have to gear up to be in social situations. And then I crash and have several days where I have to be alone to 'regroup'. It's exhausting to slow it down and think superficaially, but to fit in I have to do it.
This is why I like to stay disconnected from my emotions (including, if not especially, ethics) in most respects - I want to be able to use the logical side of my brain, including the bit that understands and manipulates people, to their full potential to bring me as much benefit as is possible.
I get what you mean with sales, too. I did some sales once and turned out to be surprisingly good at it because of my natural manipulation skills. I was very proud of myself. Then I manipulated the other people in the business I sold for and got more than my fair share of the profit
Basically I just stay on the right side of the law, because I know I'll be punished if I don't, but screw morals because they get in the way
Unlike you, I am usually shy, but I have been coming out of my shell quite a lot within the past year or so, which I'm happy about. I still have no real desire to become "cool" or part of a bigger social group, though.
30 Dec 2011, 1:44 pm
Asp-Z wrote:
seekingtruth wrote:
Nice to hear I'm not completely alone in this. It's been scary and lonely thinking I'm so 'odd' this way. Odd in the real world and then again feeling odd in this forum as I don't have the math type connections that other's have.
I see where 'people puzzle' skills are very helpful in the real world, but it seems rare so I've so often wondered what the hell is wrong with me. It's made me at times want to just completely stay away from people because it's so clear that my thought process is so different and I feel so unrelatable.
Yep, very easy to manipulate, which is pretty much what I did as a child, was always teacher's pet, they all loved me. But unfortunately I could 'fake it' so well, or I guess you could say one step ahead enough that I never got any help that I really could have used, you know?
Then as an adult I had mad selling skills because of my ability to manipulate. But then my spirituality kicked in, it was where I could 'fit in' and feel like I was 'at home' with my ease in the big picture world. And that's when I became a Buddhist - best thing that's ever happened to me. BUT now my ethics are heightened with my teaching and now I can't be in sales anymore because I feel all too clearly how wrong it is to manipulate, and trust me to be good in sales you have to manipulate. So tapping into ethics has destroyed my career ability.
I have absolutely no shyness and love to speak in groups, only class I liked in high school was speach class. So I'm sure I don't have social anxiety disorders, but because I know I am so 'out of the box' on how I relate and see peoples actions, it gets exhausting to 'pretend' to be on their more down to earth level and because of that I have to gear up to be in social situations. And then I crash and have several days where I have to be alone to 'regroup'. It's exhausting to slow it down and think superficaially, but to fit in I have to do it.
I see where 'people puzzle' skills are very helpful in the real world, but it seems rare so I've so often wondered what the hell is wrong with me. It's made me at times want to just completely stay away from people because it's so clear that my thought process is so different and I feel so unrelatable.
Yep, very easy to manipulate, which is pretty much what I did as a child, was always teacher's pet, they all loved me. But unfortunately I could 'fake it' so well, or I guess you could say one step ahead enough that I never got any help that I really could have used, you know?
Then as an adult I had mad selling skills because of my ability to manipulate. But then my spirituality kicked in, it was where I could 'fit in' and feel like I was 'at home' with my ease in the big picture world. And that's when I became a Buddhist - best thing that's ever happened to me. BUT now my ethics are heightened with my teaching and now I can't be in sales anymore because I feel all too clearly how wrong it is to manipulate, and trust me to be good in sales you have to manipulate. So tapping into ethics has destroyed my career ability.
I have absolutely no shyness and love to speak in groups, only class I liked in high school was speach class. So I'm sure I don't have social anxiety disorders, but because I know I am so 'out of the box' on how I relate and see peoples actions, it gets exhausting to 'pretend' to be on their more down to earth level and because of that I have to gear up to be in social situations. And then I crash and have several days where I have to be alone to 'regroup'. It's exhausting to slow it down and think superficaially, but to fit in I have to do it.
This is why I like to stay disconnected from my emotions (including, if not especially, ethics) in most respects - I want to be able to use the logical side of my brain, including the bit that understands and manipulates people, to their full potential to bring me as much benefit as is possible.
I get what you mean with sales, too. I did some sales once and turned out to be surprisingly good at it because of my natural manipulation skills. I was very proud of myself. Then I manipulated the other people in the business I sold for and got more than my fair share of the profit
Basically I just stay on the right side of the law, because I know I'll be punished if I don't, but screw morals because they get in the way
Unlike you, I am usually shy, but I have been coming out of my shell quite a lot within the past year or so, which I'm happy about. I still have no real desire to become "cool" or part of a bigger social group, though.
Yeah, I have zero desire to be like anyone else, won't wear 'label' clothes if it's obvious etc. because I 'refuse' to be manipulated by the industries, lol. Like I know the ins and outs of manipulation so easily that I'm not going to be manipulated myself. I'm pretty stubborn with this, lol.
But to get along with others, I've learned to hide a lot of this part of me. So I'm not trying to be like everyone else, just want to be able to flow through life with others. I'm very interested in how others walk through their lives, it's that puzzle again, fun to be in the mix of it, so I've learned how to appear like minded to a certain degree so that I can be there in the juiciness of peoples actions and motivations, it's like a experiment for me. I enjoy hearing people's life stories and then I watch my mind see their past, present and future. It's fun but I don't let on that I'm doing that as it freaks people out.
My husband however, sounds just like you. He's all about - forget ethics, get what you can and move on. He's actually quite upset with me that I refuse to sell anymore, his words "You're a gold mine that I can't tap into and it pisses me off!"
But i'm happier this way, the big picture is more comforting to me, soothing, not so exhausting so it's where I prefer to 'hang out'.
I think I'm not naturally shy because I can see people on a bigger scale then what the situation at hand is, when I can see their past, present, future instantly I think it really takes out the fear of the unknown and therefore there is no need to be shy.
30 Dec 2011, 1:56 pm
seekingtruth wrote:
Yeah, I have zero desire to be like anyone else, won't wear 'label' clothes if it's obvious etc. because I 'refuse' to be manipulated by the industries, lol. Like I know the ins and outs of manipulation so easily that I'm not going to be manipulated myself. I'm pretty stubborn with this, lol.
But to get along with others, I've learned to hide a lot of this part of me. So I'm not trying to be like everyone else, just want to be able to flow through life with others. I'm very interested in how others walk through their lives, it's that puzzle again, fun to be in the mix of it, so I've learned how to appear like minded to a certain degree so that I can be there in the juiciness of peoples actions and motivations, it's like a experiment for me. I enjoy hearing people's life stories and then I watch my mind see their past, present and future. It's fun but I don't let on that I'm doing that as it freaks people out.
My husband however, sounds just like you. He's all about - forget ethics, get what you can and move on. He's actually quite upset with me that I refuse to sell anymore, his words "You're a gold mine that I can't tap into and it pisses me off!"
But i'm happier this way, the big picture is more comforting to me, soothing, not so exhausting so it's where I prefer to 'hang out'.
I think I'm not naturally shy because I can see people on a bigger scale then what the situation at hand is, when I can see their past, present, future instantly I think it really takes out the fear of the unknown and therefore there is no need to be shy.
But to get along with others, I've learned to hide a lot of this part of me. So I'm not trying to be like everyone else, just want to be able to flow through life with others. I'm very interested in how others walk through their lives, it's that puzzle again, fun to be in the mix of it, so I've learned how to appear like minded to a certain degree so that I can be there in the juiciness of peoples actions and motivations, it's like a experiment for me. I enjoy hearing people's life stories and then I watch my mind see their past, present and future. It's fun but I don't let on that I'm doing that as it freaks people out.
My husband however, sounds just like you. He's all about - forget ethics, get what you can and move on. He's actually quite upset with me that I refuse to sell anymore, his words "You're a gold mine that I can't tap into and it pisses me off!"
But i'm happier this way, the big picture is more comforting to me, soothing, not so exhausting so it's where I prefer to 'hang out'.
I think I'm not naturally shy because I can see people on a bigger scale then what the situation at hand is, when I can see their past, present, future instantly I think it really takes out the fear of the unknown and therefore there is no need to be shy.
I'm a bit like this too, I guess. I don't conform but I flow. I like that way of thinking. And you can't manipulate if people don't think you fit in with them on some level anyway
The thing about learning lots about peoples' lives reminds me of my girlfriend. She's not on the spectrum (officially, anyway) but she's far too weird (in a very good way) to be NT, I'm sure. But yeah, she does the same thing, and she loves learning all about people
Your husband and I would probably get along... Or try hard to get as much money off each other as we can... Either way
Taking the fear out of the unknown is an interesting way to combat shyness, but it does makes sense. Humans are usually scared of the unknown - it's an evolutionary instinct - so getting to know the thing you're scared of - an old method of defeating phobias, too - may very well be what happened to me too.
30 Dec 2011, 1:56 pm
seekingtruth wrote:
Asp-Z wrote:
seekingtruth wrote:
Nice to hear I'm not completely alone in this. It's been scary and lonely thinking I'm so 'odd' this way. Odd in the real world and then again feeling odd in this forum as I don't have the math type connections that other's have.
I see where 'people puzzle' skills are very helpful in the real world, but it seems rare so I've so often wondered what the hell is wrong with me. It's made me at times want to just completely stay away from people because it's so clear that my thought process is so different and I feel so unrelatable.
Yep, very easy to manipulate, which is pretty much what I did as a child, was always teacher's pet, they all loved me. But unfortunately I could 'fake it' so well, or I guess you could say one step ahead enough that I never got any help that I really could have used, you know?
Then as an adult I had mad selling skills because of my ability to manipulate. But then my spirituality kicked in, it was where I could 'fit in' and feel like I was 'at home' with my ease in the big picture world. And that's when I became a Buddhist - best thing that's ever happened to me. BUT now my ethics are heightened with my teaching and now I can't be in sales anymore because I feel all too clearly how wrong it is to manipulate, and trust me to be good in sales you have to manipulate. So tapping into ethics has destroyed my career ability.
I have absolutely no shyness and love to speak in groups, only class I liked in high school was speach class. So I'm sure I don't have social anxiety disorders, but because I know I am so 'out of the box' on how I relate and see peoples actions, it gets exhausting to 'pretend' to be on their more down to earth level and because of that I have to gear up to be in social situations. And then I crash and have several days where I have to be alone to 'regroup'. It's exhausting to slow it down and think superficaially, but to fit in I have to do it.
I see where 'people puzzle' skills are very helpful in the real world, but it seems rare so I've so often wondered what the hell is wrong with me. It's made me at times want to just completely stay away from people because it's so clear that my thought process is so different and I feel so unrelatable.
Yep, very easy to manipulate, which is pretty much what I did as a child, was always teacher's pet, they all loved me. But unfortunately I could 'fake it' so well, or I guess you could say one step ahead enough that I never got any help that I really could have used, you know?
Then as an adult I had mad selling skills because of my ability to manipulate. But then my spirituality kicked in, it was where I could 'fit in' and feel like I was 'at home' with my ease in the big picture world. And that's when I became a Buddhist - best thing that's ever happened to me. BUT now my ethics are heightened with my teaching and now I can't be in sales anymore because I feel all too clearly how wrong it is to manipulate, and trust me to be good in sales you have to manipulate. So tapping into ethics has destroyed my career ability.
I have absolutely no shyness and love to speak in groups, only class I liked in high school was speach class. So I'm sure I don't have social anxiety disorders, but because I know I am so 'out of the box' on how I relate and see peoples actions, it gets exhausting to 'pretend' to be on their more down to earth level and because of that I have to gear up to be in social situations. And then I crash and have several days where I have to be alone to 'regroup'. It's exhausting to slow it down and think superficaially, but to fit in I have to do it.
This is why I like to stay disconnected from my emotions (including, if not especially, ethics) in most respects - I want to be able to use the logical side of my brain, including the bit that understands and manipulates people, to their full potential to bring me as much benefit as is possible.
I get what you mean with sales, too. I did some sales once and turned out to be surprisingly good at it because of my natural manipulation skills. I was very proud of myself. Then I manipulated the other people in the business I sold for and got more than my fair share of the profit
Basically I just stay on the right side of the law, because I know I'll be punished if I don't, but screw morals because they get in the way
Unlike you, I am usually shy, but I have been coming out of my shell quite a lot within the past year or so, which I'm happy about. I still have no real desire to become "cool" or part of a bigger social group, though.
Yeah, I have zero desire to be like anyone else, won't wear 'label' clothes if it's obvious etc. because I 'refuse' to be manipulated by the industries, lol. Like I know the ins and outs of manipulation so easily that I'm not going to be manipulated myself. I'm pretty stubborn with this, lol.
But to get along with others, I've learned to hide a lot of this part of me. So I'm not trying to be like everyone else, just want to be able to flow through life with others. I'm very interested in how others walk through their lives, it's that puzzle again, fun to be in the mix of it, so I've learned how to appear like minded to a certain degree so that I can be there in the juiciness of peoples actions and motivations, it's like a experiment for me. I enjoy hearing people's life stories and then I watch my mind see their past, present and future. It's fun but I don't let on that I'm doing that as it freaks people out.
My husband however, sounds just like you. He's all about - forget ethics, get what you can and move on. He's actually quite upset with me that I refuse to sell anymore, his words "You're a gold mine that I can't tap into and it pisses me off!"
But i'm happier this way, the big picture is more comforting to me, soothing, not so exhausting so it's where I prefer to 'hang out'.
I think I'm not naturally shy because I can see people on a bigger scale then what the situation at hand is, when I can see their past, present, future instantly I think it really takes out the fear of the unknown and therefore there is no need to be shy.
Interesting.
May i ask, what subject do you teach?
TheSunAlsoRises
30 Dec 2011, 2:31 pm
TheSunAlsoRises wrote:
seekingtruth wrote:
Asp-Z wrote:
seekingtruth wrote:
Nice to hear I'm not completely alone in this. It's been scary and lonely thinking I'm so 'odd' this way. Odd in the real world and then again feeling odd in this forum as I don't have the math type connections that other's have.
I see where 'people puzzle' skills are very helpful in the real world, but it seems rare so I've so often wondered what the hell is wrong with me. It's made me at times want to just completely stay away from people because it's so clear that my thought process is so different and I feel so unrelatable.
Yep, very easy to manipulate, which is pretty much what I did as a child, was always teacher's pet, they all loved me. But unfortunately I could 'fake it' so well, or I guess you could say one step ahead enough that I never got any help that I really could have used, you know?
Then as an adult I had mad selling skills because of my ability to manipulate. But then my spirituality kicked in, it was where I could 'fit in' and feel like I was 'at home' with my ease in the big picture world. And that's when I became a Buddhist - best thing that's ever happened to me. BUT now my ethics are heightened with my teaching and now I can't be in sales anymore because I feel all too clearly how wrong it is to manipulate, and trust me to be good in sales you have to manipulate. So tapping into ethics has destroyed my career ability.
I have absolutely no shyness and love to speak in groups, only class I liked in high school was speach class. So I'm sure I don't have social anxiety disorders, but because I know I am so 'out of the box' on how I relate and see peoples actions, it gets exhausting to 'pretend' to be on their more down to earth level and because of that I have to gear up to be in social situations. And then I crash and have several days where I have to be alone to 'regroup'. It's exhausting to slow it down and think superficaially, but to fit in I have to do it.
I see where 'people puzzle' skills are very helpful in the real world, but it seems rare so I've so often wondered what the hell is wrong with me. It's made me at times want to just completely stay away from people because it's so clear that my thought process is so different and I feel so unrelatable.
Yep, very easy to manipulate, which is pretty much what I did as a child, was always teacher's pet, they all loved me. But unfortunately I could 'fake it' so well, or I guess you could say one step ahead enough that I never got any help that I really could have used, you know?
Then as an adult I had mad selling skills because of my ability to manipulate. But then my spirituality kicked in, it was where I could 'fit in' and feel like I was 'at home' with my ease in the big picture world. And that's when I became a Buddhist - best thing that's ever happened to me. BUT now my ethics are heightened with my teaching and now I can't be in sales anymore because I feel all too clearly how wrong it is to manipulate, and trust me to be good in sales you have to manipulate. So tapping into ethics has destroyed my career ability.
I have absolutely no shyness and love to speak in groups, only class I liked in high school was speach class. So I'm sure I don't have social anxiety disorders, but because I know I am so 'out of the box' on how I relate and see peoples actions, it gets exhausting to 'pretend' to be on their more down to earth level and because of that I have to gear up to be in social situations. And then I crash and have several days where I have to be alone to 'regroup'. It's exhausting to slow it down and think superficaially, but to fit in I have to do it.
This is why I like to stay disconnected from my emotions (including, if not especially, ethics) in most respects - I want to be able to use the logical side of my brain, including the bit that understands and manipulates people, to their full potential to bring me as much benefit as is possible.
I get what you mean with sales, too. I did some sales once and turned out to be surprisingly good at it because of my natural manipulation skills. I was very proud of myself. Then I manipulated the other people in the business I sold for and got more than my fair share of the profit
Basically I just stay on the right side of the law, because I know I'll be punished if I don't, but screw morals because they get in the way
Unlike you, I am usually shy, but I have been coming out of my shell quite a lot within the past year or so, which I'm happy about. I still have no real desire to become "cool" or part of a bigger social group, though.
Yeah, I have zero desire to be like anyone else, won't wear 'label' clothes if it's obvious etc. because I 'refuse' to be manipulated by the industries, lol. Like I know the ins and outs of manipulation so easily that I'm not going to be manipulated myself. I'm pretty stubborn with this, lol.
But to get along with others, I've learned to hide a lot of this part of me. So I'm not trying to be like everyone else, just want to be able to flow through life with others. I'm very interested in how others walk through their lives, it's that puzzle again, fun to be in the mix of it, so I've learned how to appear like minded to a certain degree so that I can be there in the juiciness of peoples actions and motivations, it's like a experiment for me. I enjoy hearing people's life stories and then I watch my mind see their past, present and future. It's fun but I don't let on that I'm doing that as it freaks people out.
My husband however, sounds just like you. He's all about - forget ethics, get what you can and move on. He's actually quite upset with me that I refuse to sell anymore, his words "You're a gold mine that I can't tap into and it pisses me off!"
But i'm happier this way, the big picture is more comforting to me, soothing, not so exhausting so it's where I prefer to 'hang out'.
I think I'm not naturally shy because I can see people on a bigger scale then what the situation at hand is, when I can see their past, present, future instantly I think it really takes out the fear of the unknown and therefore there is no need to be shy.
Interesting.
May i ask, what subject do you teach?
TheSunAlsoRises
Oh, i'm not a teacher. I've actually totally stepped out of the career world.
I'm a student of Buddhism and meditation. I study at home and with a Sangha. Home daily, Sangha about 3 times a week.
Someday however, I'd love to be a teacher of the Dharma. I have many friends who are also on the path that come to me for Dharma clarafication when they are stuck on something and they say I'm a natural at understanding and teaching it, so maybe I can achieve that possibility.
But for now, I 'teach' my 6 year old aspie son mindfulness and mediation and some yoga that calms him. And I help my friends who also have children on the spectrum that have seen the changes in my son and now want that for their children, so I teach them how to help their children.
Other then that, my husband and I are landlords (he's also an engineer -very detailed person). So Asp-z will get a chuckle out of that, I think those two would get along very well. And believe me it's an interesting blend the two of us landlording together, husband is all about the books and the investment and I'm all about ethics, so basically the tenants are very happy I'm in the picture,lol.
30 Dec 2011, 2:39 pm
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artrat
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Joined: 6 Nov 2011
Age: 39
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Location: The Butthole of the American Empire
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