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Joined: 23 Aug 2007
Age: 31
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,508
Location: The Poconos, Pennsylvania

26 Jan 2012, 12:52 am

Well, I FINALLY managed to break myself out of my writers block. Timeline for the fantasy series has been finally wrapped up nicely and I am so far about 2500 words into this work. So its times To break out the prologue and get some opinions.
(NOTICE: I haven't proofreaded anything yet and it is the rough draft after all. I am trying to set myself apart, going for a more TV-show/Anime/Cinematic type of feel for it, so things might seem a bit weird as well. It doesn't reveal much in the plot details though, and I will also mention that there is a large cast. Heroes/Villains won't be cut and dry either, because as I say, good and evil is all viewpoint dependent.)

Input WILL be deliberated upon, but I write for myself, what I would like to read. So just keep that in mind ^^

“It seems we have made it through last nights storm... I sure hope Exarch Renard is correct about the location of Rezhial's orb.”, a short, thin, woman in crimson robes whined in an almost child-like voice. “I am getting sick and tired of these trips, I am definitely not looking forward to taking another one. Why can't we just portal ourselves to town instead of sail everywhere?” She was leaning on the railing of the ship, staring at the waves crashing into the hull.

“What, the little girl cannot stand being rocked around by natures wrath?” A thin, man with long black hair clad in leather armor stated with an amused grin playing across his lips.

The woman quickly turned around, the wind blowing the hood off of her head, her auburn hair blowing in the wind. “I am not a little girl! I am a grown woman damn it!” She screamed at the man, her thin angular face turning a bright scarlet hue.

The man almost doubled over in laughter, “Oh, so you are available then? I bet you wouldn't mind me rocking your ship then would you?”. He blurted out, grinning and continuing to hold back his laughter.

The woman balled up her fists, turning redder, “Gustav! Orionis won't stop picking on me!” As she shouted out, a huge hulking bald man in plate-mail walked on over and planted a knee into Orionis' stomach, causing him to double over in pain momentarily. He turned around and looked down at Orionis while the woman stood beside him and giggled. “Serves you right. I wonder what the Exarch would say if he caught you making such an ass out of yourself.”

After a few moments Orionis stood back up and regained his composure. “He would probably side with you, you are his daughter after all. Speaking of which, did he mention who we would be going after?” Orionis rubbed his stomach and glared at Gustav, who was looking up at the sky whistling.

“A mercenary named Zaed Valen. He will be traveling in high company to say the least. You hear anything about the missing High Magister of the Grey tower?” the woman said as she turned back around to watch the waves.

“Yeah I have heard about the disappearance of High Magister Moriarcis and his daughter. If that is the case ,Vela, I am pretty sure the Imperium would like to see them safely returned. They would probably pay us a fortune.” Orionis stated as we walked over to Vela and stood beside her.

Gustav looked in the direction the ship was traveling and let out a big yawn. “Vela, Orionis... we will be arriving at port soon. I suggest we make preparations.” He said in a deep, rough voice that bordered on a growl.

Myers Brigg - ISTP
Socionics - ISTx
Enneagram - 6w5

Yes, I do have a DeviantArt, it is at....