how to tell her to stop talking about her ex

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PastFixations
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09 Feb 2012, 8:26 pm

too late to say that now to be honest.


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tronist
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10 Feb 2012, 2:31 am

thanks for all the support guys :D

our forum community is so awesome!

anyone know how to make the slightly empty feeling go away faster? or is this strictly a time-healing thing?

and, thinking positively, i did learn a lot about what to do, and what NOT to do. i just wish i could get over being a noob at all of this and actually make something work, or find a good opportunity / someone im interested in who will reciprocate.



PastFixations
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10 Feb 2012, 4:28 am

It'll take as long as it does, you will know when you are ready to move on when you can let go and think nothing of what happened.
In my case it took about a year to recover and come to terms with what happened in the relationship. I can't say in your case as only you can... understand when it does not bother you.


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hale_bopp
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10 Feb 2012, 5:50 am

tronist wrote:
thanks for all the support guys :D

our forum community is so awesome!

anyone know how to make the slightly empty feeling go away faster? or is this strictly a time-healing thing?

and, thinking positively, i did learn a lot about what to do, and what NOT to do. i just wish i could get over being a noob at all of this and actually make something work, or find a good opportunity / someone im interested in who will reciprocate.


You sound like you're dealing with it like a top dude. Don't let it discourage you. Time and physical distance is what it takes, unless you can shut off your emotions. (I can do that sometimes, but then the human creeps back into me).



RICKY5
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18 Feb 2012, 2:00 am

tronist wrote:
so the girl that i like is still hung up on her ex. she basically insists that we talk about her ex boyfriend. she says she knows they are just friends, but i can tell she still cares for him deeply. i cant tell her 'dont talk to him anymore' because she really doesnt know me, and she'd choose him over me in an instant. shes let me know before that shes hard to get to know, and its hard for her to trust people, and hard for her to let people into her life.

idk. it really seems like shes making an effort to appease me and give me a shot, but when we talk its 'ex this.. ex that.. this one time he did this.. blah blah'. whenever were not talking about her ex, she runs out of steam, and doesnt carry the conversation at all. i have to constantly keep the conversation going basically alone lol. which is incredibly hard for me because small talk isnt exactly my strong suite. i think this is because she doesnt trust easily, and has a hard time letting me into her life and what not (as stated before), but idk.

and yea, i should probably just stop talking to her all together. i dont want to do that just yet, however. i want to give her a shot because i have a good feeling she would be a good match for me.

shes not always so bad at carrying conversations, but she does run out of steam pretty fast XD. i can tell shes very smart, and im attracted to her, and she has a good sense of humor.

so.. how do i tell her i dont want to talk about her ex boyfriend when she insists that she could talk about this subject for hours and never run out of things to say? i DO like talking to her, but i absolutely cannot stand listening to her talk about her ex.

would saying 'hey, i'd really appreciate it if we could stray away from the subject of your ex' work? what other things could i say instead?


Have you banged her yet?

If not, then she is just putting you into the "friend zone" and trying to make herself feel more attractive.