Board index › Coping in life › Love and Dating

Mr. no text back has texted back.

Page 7 of 8 [ 125 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1 ... 4, 5, 6, 7, 8  Next

Previous topic | Next topic

Sweetleaf
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Jan 2011
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 34,469
Location: Somewhere in Colorado

06 Mar 2012, 11:20 am

boblol wrote:
If I was you sweet leaf I would change the way you look at your self. You avatar seems to be you trying hard to look as weak timid and vunerable as possible. If you're seeing that picture of yourself every day and feeling like that every day, then your going to send out those signals.
I'm not saying your going to become confident over night but even looking blank/unemotional would be better than that, just try a little change. Be the "master of your reality" to reference the album title.


I really have no idea what you would even want me to say to that, I was not really trying to look any way specific in that picture...also though this is not really a topic for this thread I have tried changing how I look at myself and it does not work nor do I think it would change my physical appearance.


_________________
We won't go back.


Last edited by Sweetleaf on 06 Mar 2012, 11:23 am, edited 1 time in total.

Tequila
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 25 Feb 2006
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 28,897
Location: Lancashire, UK

06 Mar 2012, 11:21 am

Sweetleaf wrote:
I was not really trying to look any way specific in that picture.


You look absolutely miserable and vulnerable in that avatar. Is that how you want the rest of the world - and especially men - to see you?



Sweetleaf
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Jan 2011
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 34,469
Location: Somewhere in Colorado

06 Mar 2012, 11:24 am

I like how I finally come to to conclusion after texting this guy that I don't want to see him again, everyone finds something else to criticize me about.......other then having wanted to text him back to find out what was going on.


_________________
We won't go back.


Sweetleaf
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Jan 2011
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 34,469
Location: Somewhere in Colorado

06 Mar 2012, 11:25 am

Tequila wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
I was not really trying to look any way specific in that picture.


You look absolutely miserable and vulnerable in that avatar. Is that how you want the rest of the world - and especially men - to see you?


Most of the time that is more or less how I feel, and I'm not interested in sex therefore guys who are into that are going to have a hard time getting in my pants so to speak.


_________________
We won't go back.


Tequila
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 25 Feb 2006
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 28,897
Location: Lancashire, UK

06 Mar 2012, 11:26 am

We applaud you for finally taking the initiative.

We are simply suggesting something else that you could do to improve your outward appearance with little effort required.



hyperlexian
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Jul 2010
Age: 51
Gender: Female
Posts: 22,023
Location: with bucephalus

06 Mar 2012, 11:27 am

Tequila wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
boblol wrote:
If I was you sweet leaf I would change the way you look at your self. You avatar seems to be you trying hard to look as weak timid and vunerable as possible. If you're seeing that picture of yourself every day and feeling like that every day, then your going to send out those signals.
I'm not saying your going to become confident over night but even looking blank/unemotional would be better than that, just try a little change. Be the "master of your reality" to reference the album title.

this is awesome advice!


When I said the same about that avatar I was viciously condemned by all and sundry. Glad someone else feels the same way.

you didn't say that she appeared timid or weak, so no... it was not the same thing. boblol is saying that her strength is tied into her image of herself, so if she projects herself as strong and confident in her photo then she will reflect that in real life. you just insulted her without any positive reinforcement at all, which is entirely different.

also, whatever happened to the fact that you are supposed to stop commenting on her threads?


_________________
on a break, so if you need assistance please contact another moderator from this list:
viewtopic.php?t=391105


Sweetleaf
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Jan 2011
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 34,469
Location: Somewhere in Colorado

06 Mar 2012, 11:28 am

Tequila wrote:
We applaud you for finally taking the initiative.

We are simply suggesting something else that you could do to improve your outward appearance with little effort required.


I don't really think there is anything wrong with my physical appearance unless I go a week or more without showering...well ok I guess pimples kinda suck but I don't feel like wearing cover up or anything like that.


_________________
We won't go back.


Sweetleaf
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Jan 2011
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 34,469
Location: Somewhere in Colorado

06 Mar 2012, 11:32 am

hyperlexian wrote:
Tequila wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
boblol wrote:
If I was you sweet leaf I would change the way you look at your self. You avatar seems to be you trying hard to look as weak timid and vunerable as possible. If you're seeing that picture of yourself every day and feeling like that every day, then your going to send out those signals.
I'm not saying your going to become confident over night but even looking blank/unemotional would be better than that, just try a little change. Be the "master of your reality" to reference the album title.

this is awesome advice!


When I said the same about that avatar I was viciously condemned by all and sundry. Glad someone else feels the same way.

you didn't say that she appeared timid or weak, so no... it was not the same thing. boblol is saying that her strength is tied into her image of herself, so if she projects herself as strong and confident in her photo then she will reflect that in real life. you just insulted her without any positive reinforcement at all, which is entirely different.

also, whatever happened to the fact that you are supposed to stop commenting on her threads?


Hmm if only people just didn't want to insult me on my threads.......that would be better, oh well such is life.

and I am not strong and confident so if I appeared that way it would be fake, and unfortunately I am not a very good actress at all.


_________________
We won't go back.


Tequila
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 25 Feb 2006
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 28,897
Location: Lancashire, UK

06 Mar 2012, 11:34 am

Sweetleaf wrote:
I don't really think there is anything wrong with my physical appearance unless I go a week or more without showering...well ok I guess pimples kinda suck but I don't feel like wearing cover up or anything like that.


Sorry, I didn't mean it like that. I phrased this badly and for that I apologise. I'm sure your self-care is absolutely fine and it was not that that I meant. I'm more on about the impression you make on others if that makes sense?

I'm mainly on about positive - or at least neutral - self-reinforcement on here. To many people, your avatar reflects a very miserable and vulnerable attitude in yourself - you look down, you have an upset sort of face. How about retaking the picture to look fairly positive or at least neutral? Many people don't and can't do "happy" faces on here - I look ludicrous myself when I try! - but a neutral expression shows that you are perhaps keeping yourself in a positive frame of mind? Many, many people here don't feel positive in their real lives but they try to keep a "brave face" on it if that makes sense?



hyperlexian
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Jul 2010
Age: 51
Gender: Female
Posts: 22,023
Location: with bucephalus

06 Mar 2012, 11:34 am

Tequila wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
I don't really think there is anything wrong with my physical appearance unless I go a week or more without showering...well ok I guess pimples kinda suck but I don't feel like wearing cover up or anything like that.


Sorry, I didn't mean it like that. I phrased this badly and for that I apologise. I'm sure your self-care is absolutely fine and it was not that that I meant. I'm more on about the impression you make on others if that makes sense?

I'm mainly on about positive - or at least neutral - self-reinforcement on here. To many people, your avatar reflects a very miserable and vulnerable attitude in yourself - you look down, you have an upset sort of face. How about retaking the picture to look fairly positive or at least neutral? Many people don't and can't do "happy" faces on here - I look ludicrous myself when I try! - but a neutral expression shows that you are perhaps keeping yourself in a positive frame of mind? Many, many people here don't feel positive in their real lives but they try to keep a "brave face" on it if that makes sense?

stop posting in her threads.


_________________
on a break, so if you need assistance please contact another moderator from this list:
viewtopic.php?t=391105


Sweetleaf
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Jan 2011
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 34,469
Location: Somewhere in Colorado

06 Mar 2012, 11:37 am

Tequila wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
I don't really think there is anything wrong with my physical appearance unless I go a week or more without showering...well ok I guess pimples kinda suck but I don't feel like wearing cover up or anything like that.


Sorry, I didn't mean it like that. I phrased this badly and for that I apologise. I'm sure your self-care is absolutely fine and it was not that that I meant. I'm more on about the impression you make on others if that makes sense?

I'm mainly on about positive - or at least neutral - self-reinforcement on here. To many people, your avatar reflects a very miserable and vulnerable attitude in yourself - you look down, you have an upset sort of face. How about retaking the picture to look fairly positive or at least neutral? Many people don't and can't do "happy" faces on here - I look ludicrous myself when I try! - but a neutral expression shows that you are perhaps keeping yourself in a positive frame of mind? Many, many people here don't feel positive in their real lives but they try to keep a "brave face" on it if that makes sense?


But I am not keeping myself in a positive frame of mind at all even though I'm attempting to......I even have a job opportunity and I am stressing because I don't know if I can f*cking handle it with the way my minds been going......and I see no reason to go put up a different picture just to make everyone else happy. I mean whatever Its not likely I will keep it up much longer now cause I feel like if it bothers people that much might as well put a picture of something besides me up.

oh well.


_________________
We won't go back.


Sweetleaf
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Jan 2011
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 34,469
Location: Somewhere in Colorado

06 Mar 2012, 11:39 am

hyperlexian wrote:
Tequila wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
I don't really think there is anything wrong with my physical appearance unless I go a week or more without showering...well ok I guess pimples kinda suck but I don't feel like wearing cover up or anything like that.


Sorry, I didn't mean it like that. I phrased this badly and for that I apologise. I'm sure your self-care is absolutely fine and it was not that that I meant. I'm more on about the impression you make on others if that makes sense?

I'm mainly on about positive - or at least neutral - self-reinforcement on here. To many people, your avatar reflects a very miserable and vulnerable attitude in yourself - you look down, you have an upset sort of face. How about retaking the picture to look fairly positive or at least neutral? Many people don't and can't do "happy" faces on here - I look ludicrous myself when I try! - but a neutral expression shows that you are perhaps keeping yourself in a positive frame of mind? Many, many people here don't feel positive in their real lives but they try to keep a "brave face" on it if that makes sense?

stop posting in her threads.


uhh out of all due respect I never did ask that anyone be barred from posting in my threads, and I am not exactly a big fan of censorship.....if I can post in everyone elses threads they should be able to post in mine. I can always report things if someone actually does go and say something out of line with the rules or whatever. just have to say that.


_________________
We won't go back.


hyperlexian
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Jul 2010
Age: 51
Gender: Female
Posts: 22,023
Location: with bucephalus

06 Mar 2012, 11:43 am

Sweetleaf wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
Tequila wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
I don't really think there is anything wrong with my physical appearance unless I go a week or more without showering...well ok I guess pimples kinda suck but I don't feel like wearing cover up or anything like that.


Sorry, I didn't mean it like that. I phrased this badly and for that I apologise. I'm sure your self-care is absolutely fine and it was not that that I meant. I'm more on about the impression you make on others if that makes sense?

I'm mainly on about positive - or at least neutral - self-reinforcement on here. To many people, your avatar reflects a very miserable and vulnerable attitude in yourself - you look down, you have an upset sort of face. How about retaking the picture to look fairly positive or at least neutral? Many people don't and can't do "happy" faces on here - I look ludicrous myself when I try! - but a neutral expression shows that you are perhaps keeping yourself in a positive frame of mind? Many, many people here don't feel positive in their real lives but they try to keep a "brave face" on it if that makes sense?

stop posting in her threads.


uhh out of all due respect I never did ask that anyone be barred from posting in my threads, and I am not exactly a big fan of censorship.....if I can post in everyone elses threads they should be able to post in mine. I can always report things if someone actually does go and say something out of line with the rules or whatever. just have to say that.

you haven't ever reported anyone in the past, even when they attacked you. are you willing to actually do so from now on?

EDIT: also, there was a whole long thread about this, which you participated in. certain members agreed that they should no longer post in your threads. this should not be news to you.


_________________
on a break, so if you need assistance please contact another moderator from this list:
viewtopic.php?t=391105


Last edited by hyperlexian on 06 Mar 2012, 11:45 am, edited 1 time in total.

Tequila
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 25 Feb 2006
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 28,897
Location: Lancashire, UK

06 Mar 2012, 11:44 am

Sweetleaf wrote:
uhh out of all due respect I never did ask that anyone be barred from posting in my threads, and I am not exactly a big fan of censorship.....if I can post in everyone elses threads they should be able to post in mine. I can always report things if someone actually does go and say something out of line with the rules or whatever. just have to say that.


Thank you. :)

You should think positively about two things that you've done recently. You've had the self-awareness and stones to tell a creepy-as-hell guy to bugger off (not easy for someone as vulnerable as you) - therefore showing your own mind! - and you've also stood up for yourself in here. That's two things to be proud of. You're not as useless as you think.

Well, hyperlexian? Are you going to disregard the OP's wishes or not?



hyperlexian
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Jul 2010
Age: 51
Gender: Female
Posts: 22,023
Location: with bucephalus

06 Mar 2012, 11:45 am

Tequila wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
uhh out of all due respect I never did ask that anyone be barred from posting in my threads, and I am not exactly a big fan of censorship.....if I can post in everyone elses threads they should be able to post in mine. I can always report things if someone actually does go and say something out of line with the rules or whatever. just have to say that.


Thank you. :)

You should think positively about two things that you've done recently. You've had the self-awareness and stones to tell a creepy-as-hell guy to bugger off (not easy for someone as vulnerable as you) - therefore showing your own mind! - and you've also stood up for yourself in here. That's two things to be proud of. You're not as useless as you think.

Well, hyperlexian? Are you going to disregard the OP's wishes or not?

you agreed that you would not post in her threads. since you are still not able to post nicely, that still stands.

EDIT: if you want to discuss it further, feel free to send a PM.


_________________
on a break, so if you need assistance please contact another moderator from this list:
viewtopic.php?t=391105


Last edited by hyperlexian on 06 Mar 2012, 11:47 am, edited 1 time in total.

Sweetleaf
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Jan 2011
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 34,469
Location: Somewhere in Colorado

06 Mar 2012, 11:47 am

hyperlexian wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
Tequila wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
I don't really think there is anything wrong with my physical appearance unless I go a week or more without showering...well ok I guess pimples kinda suck but I don't feel like wearing cover up or anything like that.


Sorry, I didn't mean it like that. I phrased this badly and for that I apologise. I'm sure your self-care is absolutely fine and it was not that that I meant. I'm more on about the impression you make on others if that makes sense?

I'm mainly on about positive - or at least neutral - self-reinforcement on here. To many people, your avatar reflects a very miserable and vulnerable attitude in yourself - you look down, you have an upset sort of face. How about retaking the picture to look fairly positive or at least neutral? Many people don't and can't do "happy" faces on here - I look ludicrous myself when I try! - but a neutral expression shows that you are perhaps keeping yourself in a positive frame of mind? Many, many people here don't feel positive in their real lives but they try to keep a "brave face" on it if that makes sense?

stop posting in her threads.


uhh out of all due respect I never did ask that anyone be barred from posting in my threads, and I am not exactly a big fan of censorship.....if I can post in everyone elses threads they should be able to post in mine. I can always report things if someone actually does go and say something out of line with the rules or whatever. just have to say that.

you haven't ever reported anyone in the past, even when they attacked you. are you willing to actually do so from now on?


umm probably more likely than before...but that's up to me and kinda my problem if I don't report every single time I get upset with someone and miss a few occasions......cant always tell if I am taking things personally or being insulted so I do want to be wary of false alarms as I imagine the moderators would get rather sick of that.


_________________
We won't go back.