binge eating

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not really that people are wrong in the brain but that the American food propagandists are so powerfully persuasive. lord knows the cumulative damage and lost lifetimes of the millions who were victims of Crisco [an industrial lubricant pressed into food service to counter lard which was perceived as being less healthy].

That's a good idea... I sometimes try to distract myself when I'm hungry... I even went so far one day as to make a list of things to do instead of eat...
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distraction. plenty of things are distracting, to me. but not distracting in the correct way. more like profoundly emotionally disturbing. or not distracting for long enough.

at this point in my "life", i ain't got no precious lil "friends". so can't do anything social.

ain't got no $$ to waste.

metabolism plummeting.

feel exhausted, tired, fatigued, anemic. whenever i am awake. can barely summon enough energy to do anything more than surf the Internet.

^^^that sounds like dysthymia to me, what i had for a long time also.

^^^that sounds like dysthymia to me, what i had for a long time also.
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when i was 21, got diagnosed for clinical depression. prescribed Prozac.

what made the dysthymia stop?

not regular antidepressants, but frontal lobe stimulants- amphetamines at first, then Strattera, then just vigorous daily exercise, proper nutrition and CB therapy. learning to "accentuate the positive" while dealing as best as one can with the negative. trying to be the best self one can be with what one has to work with. leaving the rest to god as much as possible. I know these all sound like platitudes, but one man's mush is another man's nutrition. they work for me, YMMV, but who knows, you might well do better than me.

not regular antidepressants, but frontal lobe stimulants- amphetamines at first, then Strattera, then just vigorous daily exercise, proper nutrition and CB therapy. learning to "accentuate the positive" while dealing as best as one can with the negative. trying to be the best self one can be with what one has to work with. leaving the rest to god as much as possible. I know these all sound like platitudes, but one man's mush is another man's nutrition. they work for me, YMMV, but who knows, you might well do better than me.
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trying as hard as i can to recognize the positive. and to use a larger definition of positive. and to see the silver lining.

walking long distances.

proper nutrition. not awesome or perfect. 9 servings dessert (whoppers/kit kat/chocolate) per week. 1 or 2 serving dairy per day. 0 or 1 serving meat per day. 3-5 serving bread per day. 9 plus serving fruit/veg total per day, and sometimes more. 4 to 6 serving water/broth per day.

so that ain't great. but precious lil "people" these days eat all sorts of junk. and i hardly ever notice anyone going bowel movement as often or as long as me. although of course maybe they do not do it in my presence. or maybe i do not notice.

last year, in the beginning of november started cognitive behavioral therapy. it is great, thus far. counselor told me the first six months it's once per week. the 2nd six months it's once every other week. after that, no more.

thus in the end of october this year, counseling ends.

insurance does not pay for any more counseling.

when i was 21 and 24 went on Prozac and Ativan. prescribed. clinical depression. anxiety.

prozac made me exhausted and numb. and less clinically depressed.

all meds, esp psych meds have side effects. some have a lot of bad side effects. the side effects are different for everyone.

and all meds cost $$.

kind of paranoid about meds now.

the psychiatrist is too far to go to by public transportation.

the medical doctor, could go to by public transportation.

but seriously though. some psych meds cause a lot of weight gain.

I used to do this as I lacked knowledge concerning nutritious fuels that are delightful alternatives, I would literally guzzle down bag after bag after bag of crisps and one long ass bar of chocolate because I didn't understand what else could provide me with that feeling of 'NOT HUNGRY NOW'. It was certainly comforting in a sickening, hollow manner. I never piled any pounds on so I didn't see any outward detriment but I changed my ways nevertheless and am much more satisfied when I reject the binging on trash and mix it in as part of a relatively balanced intake.

Strattera has the mildest sidefx profile of any of the pmeds I've tried. but GERD is notable in some. it was in me. Concerta [a timed release speed capsule] made me lose about 20# and gave me abundant energy but also made me cross so I hadda drop it in favor of Strattera which gave me calm clarity and chased the blues and blahs away.

and Strattera, unfortunately, cost $20/capsule, very steep. only Cadillac insurance covers it. no generic Atomoxetine available in America.

perhaps wise, a certain amount of fear aids survival.

Concerta does not, just the opposite.