Do aspie females seek relationships with aspie males?

Page 2 of 5 [ 65 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4, 5  Next


Ladies, do you prefer aspie or NT partner?
Aspie 32%  32%  [ 59 ]
NT 18%  18%  [ 33 ]
I'm male/don't care/show me the results 49%  49%  [ 90 ]
Total votes : 182

TheHouseholdCat
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 29 Feb 2012
Age: 35
Gender: Female
Posts: 667
Location: Berlin, Germany

20 Apr 2012, 2:39 pm

I probably would try to find a fellow Aspie.

Because most NT guys make me feel uncomfortable, if not even defective. Because I am not the cute little girl. If a guy has Asperger's it's more likely that we have common ground.


_________________
EXPANDED CIRCLE OF FIFTHS

"It's how they see things. It's a way of bringing class to an environment, and I say that pejoratively because, obviously, good music is good music however it's created, however it's motivated." - Thomas Newman


Kinme
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 13 Apr 2012
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,002
Location: Spaghetti

26 Apr 2012, 3:36 am

It seems like I always find geeky men who have similar interests to me.
I'd prefer him to be an Aspie so that I wouldn't have to explain why I am the way I am every second, and why I don't crave physical affection like most people do. I'd prefer not to be touched, for the most part.



Intravenus
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

User avatar

Joined: 30 Apr 2012
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 41

01 May 2012, 5:02 am

I'm undiagnosed and I actually have the feeling my partner is as well. Otherwise we wouldn't have worked. We've been together 7 years, and we were both equally obsessive and creepy when we met, so we fell straight into a super close, intense relationship. Nowadays we respect each other's space living together and enjoy each other's oddities (like synchronized joy squealing sessions!). I don't think I could date someone 'normal' incase they wanted me to change, or found me embarrassing (not many men would tolerate their partner turning into a squealing, flailing lunatic at the sight of a bug or animal in public..).



Heidi80
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Dec 2011
Age: 44
Gender: Female
Posts: 581

02 May 2012, 8:16 am

I've only had 2 relationships, one with an aspie man and the current with an aspie woman. I just feel that a NT wouldn't understand my weirdnesses. Ok, sometimes me and my partner break down at the same time, but we understand each other and can help each other out of the meltdown



Bloodheart
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Jan 2011
Age: 40
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,194
Location: Newcastle, England.

02 May 2012, 8:25 am

I go for whoever and whatever is available :P
I've dated a few men, mostly NT (or at least non-AS/ASD) - one autistic.

I'm used to NT men and I know what to expect, where as my experience of AS/ASD men is that it's harder to get them to show their affection or get them to realise you're interested in them, which I'd imagine being problematic...but then not sitting around like a wallflower or playing helpless girl to males seems to be problematic in relationships with NT males, either way relationships are challenging. It depends on the person...I've had a big crush on fellow WP member for a while now so I can't say I'd be totally against dating a male aspie (if I were single) :wink:


_________________
Bloodheart

Good-looking girls break hearts, and goodhearted girls mend them.


YoshiPikachu
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 30 Jul 2009
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 722
Location: Minnesota

04 May 2012, 6:16 pm

My boyfriend has AS.


_________________
Proud mother to Hannah and Joseph.


MjrMajorMajor
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 Jan 2012
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,714

04 May 2012, 6:25 pm

fragaria wrote:
I prefer a quirky NT.


That's my husband :D



SilkySifaka
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 22 Apr 2012
Age: 38
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,396
Location: UK

06 May 2012, 9:57 am

BanjoGirl wrote:
The aspie girl that wants protection and someone "to lead" her in the social situations will search a strong NT guy, the aspie girl that wants to protect or at least have a partner with similar traits as her and doesn't have the necessity to improve her social skills, will search aspies or introverted NT's.


I am definitely the girl who wants someone to lead me. I get so anxious about social situations (and life generally) that I really need someone who is calm, relaxed and laid back. It is possible that there are Aspie guys like that of course, I have never had a relationship with an Aspie so I can't really judge.

My boyfriend is NT and I don't mind if he doesn't understand me (I feel that is a lot to ask of anyone frankly, Aspie or not) I just want someone who will look after me. Because I don't have a lot of friends I am quite emotionally dependent on my boyfriend so it is important that he is happy and able to give me quite a lot of emotional support.

If I was single I wouldn't rule out anyone just because they were an Aspie or an NT.



ButterflyLady
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 29 Apr 2012
Age: 41
Gender: Female
Posts: 146
Location: Gainesville, FL

07 May 2012, 3:54 pm

So far all my relationships have been with NT's but if i found an Aspie that had strengths in my weakness and vise versa, that would be ideal for me. all the NT's i have been in a relationship with didn't really understand me because i am an Aspie. you can only pretend for so long with a partner that doesn't understand you before you have to say "enough is enough" and break it off. (all of my relationships, the male pursued me, and basically pestered me until i finally gave in. i hate when males do that. it only partially had to do with my personality, mostly because of my looks.)



Mitsuki
Raven
Raven

User avatar

Joined: 20 Jan 2012
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 109

22 Jan 2013, 2:08 pm

Only had NT bfs, wasn't diagnosed when I met them, so the fact they are NT was by chance, was not looking with that in mind.

Don't think I could date an Asperger bf, couldnt take on someone elses executive dysfunction.



Mitsuki
Raven
Raven

User avatar

Joined: 20 Jan 2012
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 109

23 Jan 2013, 2:26 pm

I should add though of course it depends on the person.



billiscool
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 5 Feb 2006
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,989

27 Jan 2013, 6:53 pm

a- there are more nt men than aspie men
b- nt men are more likely to approach all types of women
c- nt men have better social skills than aspie men
d- so therefore, aspie women are more likely going to end up with an nt man than an aspie man.

because aspie men don't approach as much, and have lower social skills. and because aspie women get a approach
by all kinds of men, they don't have to only settle for an aspie man.



yellowtamarin
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 5 Sep 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,763
Location: Australia

27 Jan 2013, 7:09 pm

billiscool wrote:
a- there are more nt men than aspie men
b- nt men are more likely to approach all types of women
c- nt men have better social skills than aspie men
d- so therefore, aspie women are more likely going to end up with an nt man than an aspie man.

because aspie men don't approach as much, and have lower social skills. and because aspie women get a approach
by all kinds of men, they don't have to only settle for an aspie man.

Some prefer an aspie man, not settle for one.



aspiekelly
Pileated woodpecker
Pileated woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 2 May 2012
Age: 37
Gender: Female
Posts: 176
Location: Nova Scotia, Canada

27 Jan 2013, 7:31 pm

Well, I have my first Aspie boyfriend and it's pretty amazing!! !! I'm 26 years old, divorced, thought I would never meet anyone! Tired of getting hurt over and over and over!! It is long distance but so worth it!! Everyday we are finding something more that we have in common. It is so amazing and very comfortable, he's like a male version of myself!



hadapurpura
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 28 May 2005
Age: 36
Gender: Female
Posts: 674

27 Jan 2013, 8:03 pm

Well, I'm 25 and I've never dated, so it's hard for me to see what type of person would suit me best, but I know it must be someone who's forward enough to take the first step, but at the same time someone I feel comfortable with (someone I love, of course). I'm truly like a baby deer in that aspect. I guess I'll end up being the type to marry her eventual best friend, or the type to end up forever alone :( The point is, I don't know yet if it will be an aspie or a NT who will be the one for me.



billiscool
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 5 Feb 2006
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,989

27 Jan 2013, 8:50 pm

yellowtamarin wrote:
billiscool wrote:
a- there are more nt men than aspie men
b- nt men are more likely to approach all types of women
c- nt men have better social skills than aspie men
d- so therefore, aspie women are more likely going to end up with an nt man than an aspie man.

because aspie men don't approach as much, and have lower social skills. and because aspie women get a approach
by all kinds of men, they don't have to only settle for an aspie man.

Some prefer an aspie man, not settle for one.


yes, you are right. But if only nt men approach them and no aspie men ever does. aspie women would end up with an nt man.
even if they prefer aspie men over nt men.