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Hi. I'm a 45 year old female who has recently discovered what has been plaguing me in every aspect of my life since I was a child. Asperger's. I only discovered Asperger's while searching for answers for some of the things I do that I get constantly questioned on and have never known any one else to do. I've done some intensive research on Asperger's in general and the female aspect. I've been reading this forum for a while and have decided to join; it takes me a lot of time to do that sometimes.

List of traits:

Childhood:
1.Had adult speech and vocabulary by age three.
2.Was told by adopted mother (adopted at three years of age after being in a foster home for two years as unadoptable at the time. Given 'Failure to Thrive' as was very small and all my 'emotional problems') that I walked very stiff "like a robot" when they got me.
3.Had an ugly doll I was obsessed with they were told they could never get rid of or I would freak. They did some time later-I didn't freak, thankfully.
4.Would be overly-friendly with no regard for boundaries and walk right into people's house we were visiting to watch tv if it was on. Crowd others.
5. Obnoxious and bossy.
6.Enjoyed only mechanical parts of dolls. Wanted only certain kinds of toys (spirograph, etc) Anything robotic or spacey. I didn't get much of either.
7.Space out for hours and want isolation
8.Listen to same record/s over and over while spacing out
9.Berated for being 'antisocial'
10.Lack of awareness (even though taught) of what to say/do in social situations.
Early adolescence:
1. Beginning to feel out of place.
2.Harder time keeping friends and very androgynous behavior
3.Extremely trusting and naive. Taken advantage of and believed everyone.
4.Beginning to notice my interests differing from other girls and becoming intense.
5.Becoming very studious and 'a researcher'.
6.Pedantic speech and becoming oddly formal and technical in speech. "Affirmative;/negative" for "yes/no", etc.
7.Take things heard literally and not understanding jokes
8.Talk too loud or too soft. Talk too much and never let anyone get a word or can't get me to speak, alternately.
Teen:
1.Obsessive interest deepening. (my obsessions were a particular band/member and pets. Pet cages specifically and would research and stare at them both for hours until I could find no more information at the time. Both obsessions continue to this day.
2.Talking to self and practicing scenarios and conversations using one of my obsessions as a 'practice person' and sort of 'imaginary friend/s'
3.#2 continues to this day. That part is extremely embarrassing and I have been caught so many times it/s become oddly normal for me to my close family.
3.Obsessive, intense research of other special interests that last for years for some. (My original two are the permanent ones, it seems, and some others come into the picture as time goes.)
4.Wearing the same article of clothing nearly every day, for years (a different article each school year).
5.Bullied in elementary school and 7th grade.
6.Bullied in summer school in high school.
7.Fantasies of being an elf (kept to self, but behavior must have leaked) and odd behavior in high school.
8.Told I had no sense of humor
9.Told by my mother (which she now denies) I spoke in a monotone
10. Complete need for justice and truth to the point of telling things about myself I don't want to and revealing too much information sometimes.
11.Injustice infuriates me
12. Misaligned emotional responses. Get teary-eyed when talking about my special interests and
13.lack of facial expression while having an intense emotion inward. Lack of response and eye contact when spoken to although I hear and understand,
14. 7,8,9,10 from childhood continued all throughout teenage and early adulthood.
15. Mimicking of others' speech inflections and mannerisms
16. Speech too loud occasionally still.
17.My friends were the odd balls like me, but I never shared the same intersts, etc.
18. Never used slang, formal speech especially in writing.
19. Awkward physical movements still and still now. Bad posture
20. Horrible handwriting and lack of coordination in steps and hands.
21.Discovered I look at pictures, etc.as described by Temple Grande, the way autistics do.
22. Had enough friends,but was the quirky,odd, serious, intellectual one. Rule follower and old-fashioned ways.
Sensory issues:
1.Being touched, especially unexpected. Being touched on the sides of torso feels like electric shock since childhood.
2.Can't stand any water on face. Must dry it immediately in shower each time it gets wet since childhood.
Can't stand anything around my neck. No collars, t-shirts, jewelry, etc. at throat. Only recent years can wear a necklace but must remove it after so many hours and have ripped one off because the catch was too fiddly and panicked.
3.Some tags are an issue, but not like some others here.
4.Sudden loud noises
5.The sound of dog nails on hard floor, scratching will send me nearly violent.
6. Children screams and any high-pitch sounds.
7.Bright lights
8.Sounds become suddenly very loud I didn't hear before and intolerable (fans, heaters, etc.)
Feel little no no emotional connection to people and have never loved any one other than my children except once at 17. Another odd ball who later committed suicide.

I rarely have friends, and usually push them away after a while because of the emotional demands or they find me too odd.

Can only stand social engagements for three hours max before exhausted and need so much downtime, and that's if there is a specific focus like a Tupperware party or something. Random, unstructured parties are nearly intolerable.
Feel intense emotions that bring the incorrect or no outward response.

Can't tell how old someone is within 15 to 20 years.

Look much younger than my age and people are shocked by how old I am.

Still enjoy kid things and things my kids have long outgrown. (movies, shows, etc.)

There is more, but I think that's enough for now.

Does this sound like AS? I have taken many different tests that all come back as AS.
My daughter is completely neurotypical in traits, but my youngest son has ADHD and many autistic traits since an infant. My oldest son has autistic traits that are more subtle.

The only one I have a record of is the Aspe-Quiz
results:
Aspie score: 165 of 200
neurotypical score 32 of 200
I'm really sorry this is so long. I only have my partner to talk to and no one else that understands AS the way people here do and I need input.
Does all this sound like I made the right decision that it must be Asperger's or am I just thinking it is?

I guess nobody but a medical professional can really answer you with certainty.

I'm sort of in the same boat as you, I have some doubts whether I have AS or not, but the more I learn about it the more I'm inclined to think I do. When I first heard about it, it was like a key fitting in a lock - it explained so much of my life. Lots on your list fits me too, even the little things like looking young. I'm 39 and people are not only shocked, some outright disbelieve me and think I'm some sort of crazy person. And I've been smoking for 24 years, I'm doing my best to age as fast as I can!

I'm going to try and see about getting evaluated (I find it really difficult to "come out", even to my doctor) but whatever the results of that are, I'm finding that understanding AS and its traits is a real eye-opener and it's helping me to understand myself much better.

I hope i'm not being rude, but since you're here, why don't you stay :D? From what i understood basically everyone is just welcome here, i have pdd-nos so i asked people on the forum because the site says ''The onle resource and community for Autism and Asperger's'' and everyone i talked to said it's fine even when you don't have anything :x So i mean if it turns out that you have something else you're always welcome. Sorry i just wanted to say that because of the title of your thread :)

Anyway hello and welcome ^^

Hi Outofsync! (Like the screen name!--So appropriate!) Welcome to Wrong Planet! Check out the many interesting and helpful forums here. I think the Autism/Asperger's forum area has at least one post article with links to several online tests. I am self diagnosed, and can relate to most of what you mentioned. It does sound to me like you are on the Autism/ Asperger's spectrum.

You are among friends here at WP! This site has a lot of helpful info. It also has some forums for non Autism/Asperger's stuff too, so you can just hang out here if you want to. Lots of people do--including me.

Thank you, everyone,for the welcome.

I remember some things that I can't really figure out why I forgot, but I suppose because there is just so much.

1. I tend to repeat words and phrases I say out loud or I hear others say over and over, but only mentally. Usually it's the most important word/phrase to my brain or the last. While I do that, I usually spell the word out using my thumb on my finger and only using firm pressure but not actually lifting my thumb. I've never heard of anyone doing this.

2. Firm touches don't bother me, only light touches. My stims include pressing my fingers onto another very hard and pressing my fingernail into my gums or between two teeth for no reason. Waving my foot back and forth usually very quickly, especially when anxious, or restless. I rub fabric and I usually wear a pendant that is very smooth and rub that very much. I don't always realize when I do these things until I've been doing them for some time, but sometimes am aware. I was thumb sucker while rubbing my ear as a toddler/child, so the firm rubbing has been my whole life.

3. Fascination with water as a toddler, according to my foster mother, and high sensitivity to cold still. High pain tolerance and am usually sweating before I realize I'm too hot.

3. I was an avid reader, usually sci-fi, classics, some fantasy., turning to wanting only non-fiction "input" as an adult. Always tried to find books and pictures of my special interests to pore over and stare at., Which is why the internet is my best friend, now!

4. Became fascinated with etiquette books and proper behavior, and was upset that clear and concrete rules I understood were ignored but ambiguous, subtle social rules and cues were focused on and I couldn't understand.

4. Become oblivious to time and surroundings when involved with my special interests and extreme irritation when interrupted.

5. Set routines and mental rehearsals of new developed routines when I need to change something.

6. I developed OCD in my mid to late 20's due to anxiety, work problems due to my executive functioning and social issues, and a very bad marriage.

All of this seems to click with what I've found in my research so far, and had no idea that my seemingly disconnected oddities and difficulties could have a core cause. It's almost unbelievable that there are others like me and I'm not some freak that others think is very intelligent and/or slightly ret*d depending on the person and situation.

Thank you again, and I welcome any and all input and shared experiences.

Welcome, Outofsync!

Hello and welcome to WP!

If you feel that you may have Asperger's, then this is a great place for you to be. You'll see when you explore the forums that many people have asked similar questions to you - just do a search on the keyword diagnosis and you'll find umpteen threads

There are some helpful scientific tests you can do if that might be useful to you - have a look in the General Austism Discussion forum and you'll find a thread just for them.

You are most certainly not alone - and by joining WP you've taken the first steps to spending time with other people who are like you and who will understand what you are going through.

Thanks,all!

I've taken every online test I could find in the past several months, read Aspergirls by Rudy Simone, found a chart for females that fit like a glove, and have looked at numerous autism/Asperger's sites for guidance. All point to the answer to the questions and confusions I and others had had about me.I just wish I was better at describing them but I've read others' descriptions and relate to so much.

Thanks you for pointing me to some tests I had not found before. I will be going through those to get a better picture.
This appears to be 'the right planet' for me.

Hi blooger Outofsync i am curretly new and a new member to this webpage WP, My blogger name is Sezzy but yeah i know how it feels to be an Aspie girl and yes i am currently reading the book in my soial girls womens group on Aspergirls by Rudy simone and i think it syas alot between the reltionships you have with friends Nt an dboyfriends or girlfriends and etc...... i myself over the years before i was diagnosed has trouble with socail communicatin and fitting in but now todya i am better in the social area but still struggling. i think if for aanothr good book to read as well is a book called Look me in the eye and temple grandins life and her aspergers and her 2nd book on threapy with animals and humans on aspergers.


it relates sooooooo sooooooo much.

Sezzy 8O

Welkome to WP

Mick