Crazy insane love addiction/obession! HELP

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Back ground info:
So my mom had a crazy love addiction and went with my dad. Well they broke up and now they are both 40 somthing and depressed!! !

I have this love addiction/obession passed on to me. I am a crazy obsessive and clingy girl. I love relationships and dating. I have had 2 serious relationships that lasted over 1 year each. I have so much love and care to give someone I get obsessive to the Max!! I will call/text my boyfriend all day and when he doesn't reply in less than 10 min I will call his phone until he responds. Mant times he has showed me 45 missed calls when he was just in the bathroom. This is a serious case! When my boyfirend tell me he can't come over a day we planned to hang out I will yell at him, cry, and completely overreact. I will keep calling him, Threathing him to come over even when he said he can't for whatever reason. I have cut myself many times over this and even attempted suicide just from 1 missed date! If I could have things my way I would want to be with my boyfriend every second of the day! I never get sick of my parenter and I hate not being with him. Often he had to lie to get away from me which hurts me more and makes me go phyco!! ! I am serious issues and I know it. I am so crazy and obessed that I cry and cry and get angery over stupid things. I keep hurting myself but blaming him. I can't take not being away from him. When he is not around or when we break up I will lay in bed and cry my eyes out, think about suicide and pretend my boyfirend is beside me. I have an imagany boyfirend that I talk to. I hug a pillow at night and cry and talk to it as its my boyfriend. I even printed his picture out and taped it to a pillow. My whole world revolves around him and I can't stop. I give him everything and because I am so crazy I scare him off and I push him out of my life when all I think I am doing is bringing us closer. I can't handle not having things my way. I need help.

I do this of fear because my parents didn't work out and I don't want to end up lonely and depressed like them!! !

Yes, fear is the overarching theme here. You have to really stand back and look at why you behave this way. Take the "45 missed calls in the bathroom" thing. So, how did you feel after he showed you that he was just in the bathroom? It's pretty silly. I am not admonishing you, I am stating a fact that you yourself probably realise. I know that the majority of us might wonder whats up if we call or text someone and they don't get back with us in 1 or two hours. But, even this can be written off: they could be washing the car, taking a nap, doing laundry, any number of things. I have felt that sharp pain too wondering why they don't get back with me. Then when they tell me what they were doing I feel relieved and a little silly for having made such a big deal out of it.
My opinion is that your fear is controlling you to point that your sense of yourself and being a separate person has atrohpied and you need this attention in order to validate that you are a person deserving of love. My recomenation, I am not a doctor (unless you count Witch Doctor...) ,is to take some time to yourself and learn who you really are and what it is you are looking for and find the reasons behind the feelings. Because as you are now, you are an addict and nobody wants to be with an addict because one can never give enough. Like you said, he had to lie to you just to have some time to himself.
You WILL end up like your parents if you don't take charge of your life. Take some time, let the dust settle, relax, find out who YOU are ok!

goodluck sweetheart.

I was like that in my 1st relationship & for a while in my 2nd. It was somewhat related to OCD & anxiety for me. I got better in my 2nd one after I started taking Buspar for anxiety & I started really trying to manage my behavior. I'm not severely obsessed in my current relationship but I'm taking Neurontin for OCD. I would not suggest going the medication route unless you have a history of having anxiety or extremely obsessive behavior with things unrelated to relationships or having panic-attacks due to relationship stuff; I had all that.

I would discuss these issues with a therapist. You are correct that you can never maintain a relationship with that type of obsessive behavior, and there could be a medical reason behind it.

Well I have went to the doctor twice this week and he told me im completely mentally as well as the blood tested showed that. He just said I'm a teenager who need to learn. He told me medication was not nessacary at all. I have also talked with many concellors and in each session I learn something new but no enough to help this problem. Me and my boyfirend have been dating for 1 year and 4 months and we just broke up a week ago because of these impossible expectations from addiction I put on him. We are working though it but the obsessiveness won't let me move on from him. I'm scared I won't find anyone else and most Importantly I am scared of waiting that time !

Completely mentally fine *
( sorry missing word error)

Alone doesn't have to mean lonely and depressed. Just because something happened with your mom and dad doesn't mean it will happen with you. It isn't the end of the world to be alone sometimes.

It kind of sounds like this is all based on anxiety. Anxiety is a continuous low-level of fear, and it's usually about something that won't even happen. Anxiety and/or worry are supposed to alert you to a potential problem. Any anxiety or fear in excess of what it takes to let you know something might be wrong is a waste.

i agree with all of this^^^

Rainbowskykat, has it occurred to you that you don't have to be like your mother? you know what she is like and what caused her problems, and you don't have to be like that. the more you try to pull people too close to you, the more they will pull away. one way or another, you have to let the anxiety go if you want to have successful relationships (or if you want to be happy single. it can really happen you know).

your patterns of behaviour sound very similar to Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). i am not saying that you have it or anything, but it seems like lots of aspies have similar behaviours to that disorder. you may want to look into treatment options like Cognitive Behaviour Therapy (CBT) or Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) as it could help you.

here are the symptoms of BPD:


http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmedhealth/PMH0001931/

and treatment options can be found here:

http://www.webmd.com/mental-health/tc/b ... t-overview

The good thing is you acknowledge and accept that your behavior is not normal and that it is affecting your relationships.

You mention you visited a doctor. Doctors do not have the training to treat mental health conditions; they deal with the body only. Try to visit a psychologist to get an informed opinion. You may not need medication (it is an artificial solution anyway) and many anxiety issues can be resolved with therapy and learning some skills.